I dunno - handwritten is pretty impressive. Handwritten unsolicited is pretty classy.
Luckily, since it’s old mail, it doesn’t count…
Those Jehovah’s Witnesses are persistent, though. I’m hoping I get another one. 
How about most junk mail for people who don’t live here any more? I still routinely get junk mail for:[ul]The previous owners (I’ve returned it multiple times and told their junk mailers they don’t live here any more, but still, companies insist on mailing them stuff.)[/ul] [ul]My roommate who moved out of state three years ago.[/ul] [ul]My roommate who was only here a couple months while she got her act together - that was two years ago.[/ul] [ul]A person I’m pretty sure doesn’t exist. I made a husband up filling out a marketing survey two addresses ago (haven’t lived there in 15 years). It disturbs me that he gets mortgage refinancing offers even though he doesn’t exist.[/ul]
It hasn’t happened in a while, but I occasionally get junk for two owners ago.
In fact, free money for the largest number of people in one day might be a good category since all the regular addressees (including my non-existent husband) regularly get credit card offers. I’m sure I’m not alone in this situation.
I’m in regardless of the ruling on this question.
GT
This sounds like fun, Im in. Should this be per doper, or per household? (just for clarification).
And how about a category for most junk mail that you can not use, even if you wanted to? I get refinance offers for student loans (call me in three years please) Today I got a post card informing me that this was my last chance to renew the warrenty on my car, the warrenty that I sold back to honda three years ago, on the car I sold 2 and ahalf years ago.
I think per household is the way to go. But previous owners’ or tenants’ mail doesn’t count. I’m willing to consider honorable mentions for especially, um, unique junk. What the heck, I can hand out gold stars ******************* with wild and reckless abandon!
How about orange stars **********************, is that gold enough??
This is no fair. It’s not even the holiday season, when I get my girlfriend’s mail and she gets mine.
Imagine getting a greeting card from a mutual friend, and reading “I just saw your mom the other day.” How do you know my mom? When were you in Florida?
I’m definitely in. I just went through 3.5 weeks of mail from when we were on vacation, and I couldn’t believe the number of credit card offers.
First day is Monday, right?
Yeah - we start Monday. Each day, we post how many of what types of junk we get, and daily winners will be declared. Then at the week, our overall winners will be crowned. Then we all send our junk mail to the overall winners, right? :eek:
OK, we won’t send off our junk. But we’ll know who the junkiest Dopers are, won’t we? 
Oh, sure.
Start a junk mail rally after Mr. Ujest stops building houses.
Y’know every part that goes into building a house: roofing shingles, nails, plumbing parts, heating/cooling/carpet, insulation,paint, doors, windows, builders associations, New Truck Ads, tools & clothing, thingamabobs and doohickeys.
Now. Imagine receiving junk mail from about 10 suppliers per item every day…week after week year after year. It was so much that it was at least a garbage bag a week. It sucked donkey balls big time.
I woulda won the $2.17 hands down.
Well, Shirley, sometimes life is just unfair. Timing is everything. But look on the bright side, maybe you’ll get a metric buttload of junk mail next week and you can claim the grand prize!
I’ll play. But when I win, I let someone else have the prize.
Of course, this all assumes I’ll remember about it this week when I pick up my mail.
A metric buttload. …heh. Thanks, butt no thanks.
OK, let me start this derby in style. Today I go <drumroll> - diddly squat. Not only no junk mail, but no mail at all!!! :eek: Holidays aside, I honestly can’t remember the last time I got no mail at all.
I’m thinking I’m not gonna win this at all. Maybe a mention in the Hall of Shame… <sigh>
I got me a coupon for $2.00 off some Prilosec today! Also, Chase Manhattan and CitiBank are jonesing to have me as a customer. AARP is trying to sell me insurance again.
An ok haul. The Prilosec coupon is a prize winning piece of mail, don’t ya think?
Hmpf…figures.
Day One Take:
One (1) Lakeside Collection catalog.
That is all.
Is there a prize for getting junk mail that you actually like? I got a sweet one today. Which piece I’m talking about is left as an exercise to the reader.
Today’s Haul:
[ul]
[li] “Pella Days!” sale flyer for Pella Windows and Doors[/li][li] “Get Started Get Going Get UNH!” catalog for University of New Hampshire Continuing Education (none of us are students there)[/li][li] A letter from “D. Ryan” of New York, NY 10001, featuring the “Pay to the order of MrValley in the cellophane window”…which of course turns out to be a sale flyer for a Subaru dealer in the next town over (which is nowhere near NY NY). MrValley has “definitely won at least one of the following prizes!” Gee…do we think it’s the $5,000 in cash, or the 3 day/2 night hotel accommodations scam? :rolleyes:[/li][li] And finally, an ad from Victoria’s Secret for their Pink line, including a coupon for a free pair of panties! (no strings attached, haha)[/li][/ul]
Not a bad haul for the first day, IMHO, and definitely very diverse.
Um, I obviously misplaced the closing quotation mark there. :smack:
I got nothin’.
Which one of you hombres squealed to the postal carrier?
Junk mail LOSER checking in here:
My take in mail today:
Bills: 3
**Junk mail for 2 previous residents: **2 (including a lovely offer of credit for one of the previous owners who hasn’t lived here for SIX years - no, I didn’t open it, but I got an identical envelope.)
**Junk mail that qualifies for the **Derby: 2
[ul]
[li]Exciting maintenance offers from the car dealer - apparently they miss me because it says “Wish you were here.” Also, apparently, they have relocated to the beach, as there are palm trees and lounge chairs in the background. :: Looks around Columbus for signs of beach; nope, not really here::[/li][li]Exciting survey from Giant Eagle about their neighborhood grocery store. If I fill it out, I get $1 off my next purchase of $1 or more. The survey is supposed to take 10 minutes or less to fill out, which means I get roughly minimum wage. Brilliant marketing strategy and timing. The store is currently being renovated and is a mess and everything is in a different place every time I go there… Yeah, they’ll enjoy my response. If I get to it.[/li][/ul]
I’m sure there’s a way to make these 2 unique items prize-worthy, but…it’s eluding me.
GT
I’m really glad to hear that I’m not the only person who received no mail whatsoever today!