Just doing my part to help out

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I’ve decided that if and when we do go to war, I’m going to offer my cat Pippa to the U.S. Government as a secret weapon. You see, Pippa’s excretions are SO odorous that they would, as the saying goes, “knock a buzzard off a shit wagon”. The stench from the litterbox has been known to cover a whole floor of the house, creeping insidiously into all the rooms, and linger for hours. Perhaps our troops could use Pippa to knock the enemy unconcious, or at least running for barf bags, and then disarm them while unconcious/yacking their lungs up. They could hurl her turds into foxholes and “stench” the enemy out. It would be known as “Operation Stench-o-matic”.

I thought about offering my cat Olli also, as he is well versed in the ancient art of “Cling-Fu”, which is when he gets a cling nugget and upon exiting the litterbox, he races through the house so that the turd is loosened and flies through the air as though shot from a cannon. This could be used to confuse or gross out the enemy: “What is this that they are shooting at us? It smells horrible, like…like…it IS! It’s cat poop! <retch>”
I decided not to offer Olli, though, because he’s too much of a spaz.

:smiley:

I hope I didn’t offend anyone or that anyone thinks I’m not taking this situation seriously. I’m not trying to be offensive, and I do take the possibility of war seriously, but I wanted to bring a bit of levity to the proceedings. I’ve found that laughter has helped me these past few days.

2

In that case, I nominate my brother’s cat. He’s a Somali (extra fluffy fur about the back end) who has developed some rather… disgusting litter box habits. (This is apparently a genetic fault.) Clingy and foul.

I’ll also volunteer my own chub-face, not because of any problems with her back-end but because her personality sucks. Just toss her towards an enemy and by the time she lands she’ll be really pissed. That’ll learn 'em.

3

Can’t volunteer either of my cats. They’re so afraid of people that they disappear when more than one stranger enters the house. If there’s only one stranger, Moody guards him to make sure he doesn’t kill us all (of course, if anyone started actually doing something, she’d disappear too)

[sub]p.s. Try Iams, Science Diet, etc. and see if that doesn’t help the smell[/sub]

4

It’s alright, moggy, I understand what you’re trying to do. Thank you for the suggestions. I feed my kitties Purina Cat Chow, and their poop is usually not stinky. And, I have learned to keep the litter box cleaned out on a very regular basis.

Why, you ask?

Well… are you sure you want to hear this?

Hmm. Ok, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

You see, my dog, half Jack Russell, half Toy Fox terrier, has decided that kitty poop is a wonderful snack. SHUDDERS :eek:
No, I have no earthly idea why. I try to keep her from doing it as much as possible.

5

Well, Molly could kill all their wildlife, Punkin could eat all their food, and Trouble could shred with the best of them, given a chance.

My lab, Ladybug, though, she’s no good…she’d just try to lick them to death.

6

purplebear, didn’t you know that cat poop is a doggy delicacy, on par with caviar in the world of humans? And yes, I know that sometimes dogs eat their own poop- the technical word for that is coprophagia. It is thought that sometimes puppies who indulge in coprophagia are suffering from a vitamin imbalance, or, that they’re just bored, and it’s there. Oh, the things you learn working for a veterinarian!

I can’t believe I’ve started my very own poop thread! I don’t know if I should be proud or embarassed!

7

It’s funny, growing up with always cats around, and sometimes dogs, I never saw one of our dogs go for the kitty poop. Yet, now that my daughter has talked me into letting her have a dog, I learn that it’s a somewhat common thing for dogs to do. I still think it’s gross, and it still makes no sense to me. Especially when she always gets plenty to eat.

Then again, I’ve seen our doggy eat almost anything. If she thinks it’s people food, she’s decided she must have some. To include fresh onions, potatoes, celery, any and all meats, cantalopes, peaches, strawberries, grapes are her favorite fruit, and many more things one would normally think of as bizzare for a dog to want to eat.

To get back to the OP, though, I agree, we can use our pets to great advantage in the upcoming conflict. I’m not at all sure how my pets can be used, yet, but anything for the cause. Perhaps Sir Wilbur would be kind enough to freak them out by his total and utter disdain for most things. I haven’t yet found anything that will faze this cat. He doesn’t scare, and he doesn’t care in the slightest if you yell at him or forcibly move him from someplace he shouldn’t be. I have grabbed him off the clean clothes, tossed him onto another part of the couch, or onto the floor, and he merely plops wherever he lands and looks at me as if to say ‘yeah? so what? like I care.’

Heather…hmm…not sure what good she would be. She’s only 1.5yrs old, but already getting fat and lazy. On the other hand, when she does want some attention, she will DEMAND it. In your face if need be. She will climb on top of the keyboard, up my front to perch with her nose touching mine. Try ignoring a 13 lb cat doing that!

And Krystal, I must admit, can growl like nobody’s business. She can manage to sound like a whole pack of wolves all by herself, a very fierce beasty; in spite of her maybe 8 or 9 lbs soaking wet form. She can bite hard too, when we’re playing; I have the scars to prove it. If she feels someone is threatening her loved ones, she can be quite fierce. < That usually means I’m trying to lean over my husband to kiss him, or trying to tickle or get a hug from my daughter or son.>