Inspired by this Pit thread about officious “team spiriters”, I suggest some motivational slogans to increase morale and boost productivity. So just remember, there’s no “I” in Mongol Horde.
The Floggings Will Continue until Morale Improves.
There’s no I in team but there is “eat me”.
I like the despair.com one about remembering that your life serves only as a warning to others.
Oh, and I hadn’t seen this one before:
“Get To Work: You aren’t being paid to believe in the power of your dreams.”
There’s no I in “fuck you, corporate drone”.
I always heard it it, “No, but there is an ‘eat’ and a ‘me’.”
My boss’ personal favorite:
“You have no formal job description. Your job is what I say it is, so shut up, smile and pretend you like it.”
He’s such a pleasure to work with sometimes…
There’s no “I” in soulless robot.
For Understand, Colleagues: Kindness Yields Only Understanding And Lightens Loads.
I just remember one bored colleague’s response when a hyped-up corporate trainer trotted out the fatuous statement about “there being no i in team”:
The trainer just didn’t know what to say. It was the best part of a dull afternoon’s training.
I used to have a coffee mug that said simply: ME BOSS YOU NOT
An old boss used to have one of those little cardboard signs like you can find at Hallmark stores. It said, “As it happens, I AM the boss of you.”
I want one.
Robin
“Sometimes, the best way to improve morale is just to fire all the unhappy people.”
…Or however that goes.
After your last performance review, it has come to my attention that there is no ‘u’ in ‘this company’.
No “I” in 'team, but one “U” in ‘dumbass.’
(‘Fuckhead’ is also acceptable).
I dunno, I may’ve heard that one before.
When I worked for a small company that got bought out by a bigger company, the head honchos wanted our company president (who had been there over 30 years) to write up an employee (who had been there for like 15 years) who had to leave early due to her son being rushed to the hospital from school. He had taken a grand mal seizure and it was a really bad scene. He was so broken up about it he was in my office pouring out his heart with tears in his eyes over it wondering what to do.
I told him she had it coming because, “Well, you know there’s no ‘I’ in Grand Mal”. Words to live by.
There’s a “U” and “I” in Uzi.
There’s no “I” in team, but there is a “U” in Fuck Off.
As I’ve often said:
“There’s no team in I”. 
My official motto when it comes to work, however, is “Pretend to care”. 
I’ve always liked:
“There’s no ‘I’ in ‘team’.”
“Yes, but there is an ‘I’ in ‘win’.”
hijack: Whenever I hear that KT Tunstall song my mind automatically sings, “No, no, you’re not the boss of me”. The song is heavily played and not one of my favorites so it’s an amusing quirk. /hijack