Just saying "Howdy"

I’ve been around awhile but I just bought the subscription. Some may remember me from a long while ago. In any event, I thought I’d say “hello”… it seemed the proper thing to do, and I can see if I still remember how to post.


Welcome, new subscriber! waves :slight_smile:

Good grief! The goat is getting tired ya’ll. We are almost out of squid, but I think I can round one up. Now just stand over there. Yes, there. Don’t mind the big X on the floor. I’ll be right back.

Don’t worry. I got an email from the shipping company today. The 6 goats and 15 squid we ordered last week should be arriving Friday at the latest. . .

Welcome, CateAyo! :cool:

runs in with an armful of whipped cream, silly string, squid chow, a stuffed armadillo, a 5 iron, a dozen vacuum bags, and a wiffle bat

I brought the goods, Hockey Monkey. Everything you asked for.

Well what has happened, we haven’t gotten the deposit back on the last initiation. We have squid, goats, and badgers running amok. There are lactating mammals in the coat room, and someone tried to slip steroids to the gerbil :eek:

You must understand, CateAyo, that we do try to do better, but like as not, you will have to wait in the basement until we get this straightened out.

I have heard a rumor based upon the number of initiations the Master may arrive to greet them all. Must be a rumor though. Gotta run and wash this goat cheese off my boots.

Welcome to the Dope.

SSG Schwartz

Don’t worry, though. The part of the basement you’ll be waiting in is pretty solidly partitioned off from the part of the basement we keep the banned dopers in. :eek:

Or is it…?

What about the Jell-O? You forgot the 500 pounds of green Jell-O!
Welcome, CateAyo!


You know I’m know good with a 5 iron. I always do the super-secret-special ritual with a 7 iron! Now I’m gonna have to adjust my swing! :::sigh::: I’ll make it work, but it ain’t gonna be pretty.

Swing harder. Newbies like their genitals compressed properly.

Due to, ah, legal reasons, we’re limited to the Jell-O on hand. I’m negotiating a bulk discount on kosher instant gel dessert.

CateAyo, thanks muchly for subscribing! The board always needs money to keep the hampsters active.

Just make sure it’s green this time. We’re not allowed to use red anymore after that last, um, incident.

Welcome back, CateAyo! Please come this way. We’re having a late buffet upstairs.

[sub]Has anyone seen Mariah?[/sub]

Mariah’s still working over the last newbie. Until she finishes that off, let’s occupy the newbie with this video.

From the above link: “Thousands of ring teeth cut into the flesh of their prey so deeply, you can hear it. When they drag their victim away with pulses from their massive jet funnel, the sounds of their hapless victim being ripped apart fills the water. It sounds a bit like heavy duty Velcro being pulled apart underwater. Then the beak can be heard, that huge knife-edged beak. The gouging of bone and tissue sound like the shredding of cabbage combined with that of hacking apart coconuts with a machete.”

Oh, initiations are just so much fun! ::smokes from a cigarette holder::

You and your videos.

Welcome, CateAyo.

How long ago were you a Member?

I was a member in 2005. I bailed when either we went pay-as-one-goes, or when my subscription expired. I don’t recall which. Thanks for bringing this up, Bosda! It points out that all this initiation stuff has already been done. Friends, friends, save the squidgoatbadgers for the truly uninitiated! So much ado for little ol’ me. I am truly embarrassed by such attention. Thanks for the howdies, everyone.


Oh no you don’t. You don’t get away that easy.

grabs him by the scruff of the neck and the seat of the pants and tosses him into Mariah’s tank