People who gave her money showed compassion. Same as the people who give homeless people on the street money. It’s not about whether or not she should have known better before she did stupid things. I’m sure there’s homeless people who are homeless solely because they did stupid things. By all rights, they should suffer the consequences of their mistakes. But some people look at others suffering from their mistakes and think “you know, if I gave this guy a buck, it could really help him out and I wouldn’t miss it that much”. That’s compassion. No, it’s not fair. That’s the whole point.
Did she deserve people’s compassion? Maybe not, but that’s really not for any of us to decide. The people who gave, gave because they saw the situation she was in and wanted to help. There’s a lot better things to be angry about than people who help others too much.
I just think she’s a shallow twit, that’s all. And a user. Yes, those WERE direct quotes from her sites. Yeah, he’s fat and smelly-but he bought me FOOD!!!
Okay, maybe it’s a bit of jealousy. What is it about shallow leeches?
Hail Ants, that’s a fair opinion to have. Irresponsible behavior got her into the mess, and I can see how one might resent the fact that she got others to pay her debts off. (Of course, they didn’t pay it all off, and she did contribute, but the fact that she’s buying expensive stuff now hardly makes this a valid point.)
I guess I’d just rather save my righteous indignation for when it affects me directly - or for when someone’s actually hurt. This isn’t quite the same as the Salvation Army taking its donations and squandering it at pinochle games.
But just wait - she was financially irresponsible once, and I bet you anything it’ll happen again. See if she puts up another site.
I’ll put myself in her place for a moment. I filed for bankrupcy in 1998 because I was pretty deep in debt myself (and wasn’t getting any better), of my own doing. Would I have done what she did? Would I have set up a Web site that asked people for donations?
You know what? I might have considered it. I was younger and dumber then; I might have thought it would be no different than a charity. I know better now, but as desperate as I was then, if it had crossed my mind, I at least might have considered it. But I probably wouldn’t have gone through with it at all, because red flags would have pooped up all over my mind, that this is wrong and unfair to those who struggle to pay their debts using their own sweat rather than that of others.
So personally, I’m glad I didn’t have the wherewithal to do what she did. Had I done so, I would have invited all the scorn, disdain, and malice that this woman is now receiving. After all, it’s one thing to ask your parents to help you out; it’s another for strangers to do it. And it’s another thing still to live large after the debt’s been paid off. After I filed for bankruptcy, I lived pretty badly (at home still!).
AS OF NOVEMBER 10, 2002…
TOTAL RECEIVED FROM NICE PEOPLE: $323.08
TOTAL RECEIVED FROM DESPERATE MEN THAT THOUGHT THEY COULD SOMEHOW GET IN MY PANTS IF THEY GAVE ME MONEY: $13,000.00
TOTAL MADE THROUGH EBAY SALES: $4,340.60
TOTAL PAID BY ME: $2,336.32
I’ll give her this though, it was orginal. I just can’t believe she got $12K from donations. Unfucking believable. I would have hoped that these people would have given money to a neighborhood soup kitchen before this beggar. Oh well.
Big deal she had $20,000 in credit card debt. I’ve had $20,000 in credit card debt. Does this mean that I’m a little fucking bitch too? (Just for the record, I paid of my debt myself.)
And how about the fact that I have a couple of $500 pairs of shoes. Does that make me a bitch also?
Good lord people. I have a job. I earn money. I buy shit. I pay my bills. If total strangers started sending me $$ to pay my mortgage I would happily take it and apply it to the debt. Would I solicit for it? No. Would I start a web site for it? No. But I wouldn’t send it back either.
I think it’s jealousy too - that either a) you didn’t think of it first, or b) how dare she spend $$ on stupid stuff.
The thing I find fascinating about this discussion is the admiration people accord to her total lack of dignity and self-respect. As if “honesty” is such an admirable trait that it makes up for being irresponsible, shallow, and greedy.
Most people who screw up in ways that reflect badly on their character – like digging a huge and totally indefensible financial hole – do not then put their bad and/or stupid behavior on public display in order to beg – literally beg – for money. They realize that since they dug the hole themselves, the responsible thing is to get out of the hole themselves, even if it takes twenty years. “Well, at least she’s honest about what a shallow, greedy, irresponsible person she is – how admirable!” Bullshit. None of it’s admirable. Not the hole she dug, and certainly not the way she chose to get out of it. Whatever happened to the concepts of responsibility and self-respect?
She’s not like the homeless person asking for a handout to buy her next meal, because without it she’ll go hungry. She’s like the teenaged punk from a nice home panhandling money for a new CD. And I have the same amount of respect for her as I do for the punk, which is to say none.
No need to be jealous… if you, too, want to meet fat, smelly men who will buy you free food, just sign up for one of the many fine internet-based dating services
OK, Max, I’m going to use my 1000th post to tell you that cracked me right the fuck up. Well done!
[sub]Besides, what else was I going to do with it? It’s not like the first 999 posts had any substance. And I would punch myself in the balls before I would start a 'Yay I posted 1000 times!" thread.[/sub]
No, no, NO!!! They did not show compassion! They showed STUPIDITY! There is nothing compassionate or altruistic or good about donating money to her like that. It is just plain stupid. And it will make people who normally are generous think twice about donating to legitimate causes, wondering if they’re not really someone doing this but lying about it this time.
And something no one has brought up yet: You can make minimum payments even on large credit card debts. She could have just done that for several years if necessary until she found a better job. She did not need $20 grand NOW. But she wasn’t even willing to do that. She didn’t feel she should even have to pay a lot of interest.
And she somehow thought asking people to do this was ‘fun’!!
I have no problem with buying expensive, extravagant things. But don’t you dare ask others to pay for them and not expect to forever be considered a scumbag low-life.
Someone mentioned that now that her debt is payed off she’s giving any more money she receives to charity. Oh good. So in other words, she received say $25K in donations from people and, after she used the first $20 grand to pay for her Gucci handbags, she’s willing to help people who can’t afford a place to live or food to eat.
And some of you here don’t get the anger?!?
You’re right. She’s a saint. And she’s so gosh-darn creative. Let’s hope 20 more sites like her’s pop up…
Why would it do this? What part did she lie about? Was she not $20K in debt? Now, I’m not going to sit here and tell you that buying extravagantly after her debt was supposedly paid off was a wise move, but she didn’t get the entire $20K in donations - she made up the difference with ebay sales and her own cash. It’s not as if she asked for $20K and then blew it all on silk panties. She didn’t really mislead anyone - but then again, you don’t have to mislead the willfully ignorant and moronic, as those who gave were.
I don’t know if you’ve ever had credit card debt, but the interest rate almost certainly would have been extremely high - she would have wound up paying perhaps twice as much (principal plus interest).
But really, who does feel they should have to pay a lot of interest? I don’t.
Also, although one can make minimum payments on a credit card, that minimum payment could be hundreds of dollars a month - it’s not always going to be $10 or $50. So sometimes paying the minimum simply isn’t an option; there are plenty of people who don’t have enough cash to make that payment each month, and each time they miss a payment, the minimum jumps exponentially.
Didn’t the numbers indicate that $13K was received from other people, and that that amount was applied to the $20K debt?
She used the first $20K to pay her debts, unless I’m completely misunderstanding the numbers shown in this thread. So yeah, I guess I can’t understand why giving some of the extra to charity is a bad thing.
Your anger is misplaced. Try being pissed at the rubes who gave her the money in the first place.
No, alice_in_wonderland, what you have done is different. I’ve calmed down enough now to say that the difference is that it’s okay to get into debt, but you must understand that it is your responsibility. You pay your bills, and you expect yourself to pay your bills. Apparently she thought she wasn’t going to get bills.
I don’t feel sorry for her “poor me” thing–especially when I know there are people in the world in much more dire circumstances who can’t/won’t set up a paypal account and make their own website to ask for help. There’s just something wrong with the fact that she’s crying over her credit card debt, and meanwhile elsewhere in the world, there are people who can’t get enough to eat.
Uh huh. So helping someone is only compassionate if they deserve to be helped? How do you decide if someone deserves to be helped? If a neighbor burns down their house smoking in bed, do they deserve to be helped? If that homeless guy on the corner used to have a good job, but got fired for coming in late to work, does he deserve to be helped?
Compassion is helping someone because you want to help them improve their situation, regardless of how or why they got there.
**
This is really stupid. “Well, I would send money to the starving children in Africa, but now that I see how that Karyn girl wasted her money, I can’t trust anybody. Before this, it never occurred to me that people could waste money. Now I’m jaded.”
**
Nope, still don’t.
This is not to say that I think Karyn is the greatest, smartest person ever. She sounds like she’s probably a dingbat in real life. But I still think it’s nice that people helped her out.
Doesn’t make you a bitch, but it strikes me as frivolous, shallow, pretentious, and a bit stupid. Not that you are any of those things or that your motives are that way, just that the statement “I have a couple of $500 pairs of shoes” strikes me that way, given no other info.
Of course, I own only one pair of shoes and they cost $65, so maybe this is more common than I know. I just don’t see how a $500 pair of shoes can be that much better than an $80 pair, unless you are trying to impress people with a particular brand. Which I personally think is pretty stupid.
Yes, that’s exactly what I mean. Helping some spoiled, irresponsible, nouvo-riche chick pay off her Bloomingdales account is not compassion. It is stupidity. And sending her money instead of giving it to a real charity is somewhat callous!
If I’m going to spend that much on clothing, I’d buy a vintage dress, or have something custom made. I mean, I’d spend the money for a pair of Peter Fox reproduction Titanic shoes (they did the shoes for the movie, and they still sell repros of them), or something like that.
But that would be money spent on someone’s labor, to create something uniquely made for ME. A fully beaded silk and crepe Edwardian evening gown complete with silver lined bugle beads would cost me about, oh, 2,000 dollars. But I’d be paying for the labor, the materials, and the fact that it’s custom made.
I wouldn’t be paying for someone’s name on my ass.
