You are Sherwood Schwartz, creator of the Brady Bunch. Since you are the greatest television innovator and trailblazer of cheesy family programming of a dozen generations, you have decided to invent the “Very Special Episode.”
What this means is that, to launch the latest season of your blended-family situation comedy, the Brady clan will head out, as usual, to some exotic and/or wacky vacation destination. But on this vacation, one of the children will ***DIE, DIE, DIE!
Yes, six Brady children will cram themselves into the Brady Family Truckster, but only five will return. The “how” will be decided by your crack writing staff at a later date (a fast-acting cancer? crushed in a stamping press? eaten by wolves? shot by a moonshiner? cursed by a voodoo witch doctor? neck snapped by an overly-enthusiastic sexual partner?), but the “who” is entirely up to you, Mr. Sherwood Schwartz.
So kill a kid, any kid, as long as it’s a Brady kid.
I voted Cindy but now that I think of it Booby would have been just as good to kill off.
Either way I’m sure it will be because of a snitches get stitches situation.
Cindy perishes in a lisp-related accident.
They’re not filling the vacant slot with Cousin Oliver, are they?
Only one? I’d say kill them all and let God sort it out.
Cant we just kill em all?
Jan can run off with George Glass as far as I’m concerned. She wasn’t attractive enough to be “the pretty one”, she wasn’t particularly funny. Hell, no wonder she had middle child syndrome.
The only two definitive Brady moments that come to mind are “Marsha, Marsha, Marsha!” and the Tiki Voodoo Statuette. The former involves the two elder sisters, the latter involves the three boys. Cindy loses because she wasn’t note-worthy enough to have a scene on the top shelf in my memory.
Marsha finally ends up working for Wayne Brady, famous entertainer by day and Pimp by night. Because lets face it she had no work skills and no man would put up with her shit long enough to marry her.
But Marsha won’t do the icky stuff, comes up short one night, and Wayne Brady finally has to choke a bitch to keep his street cred.
I was originally in the “who cares if it’s Bobby or Cindy, but it’s gotta be one of those” camp. But billfish678’s afternoon special must be told. Marsha’s gotta die for it to happen.
I voted Greg. He’s an embarrassment to all Gregs everywhere. Plus with him out of the way, I might have a shot at Marcia and/or Florence Henderson.
If we lose Greg on the TV show, we lose Greg in the movie, and I can’t support that.
If we lose Bobby, I won’t notice.
Looks like I’m an outlier, but I could never stand Bobby. Whiny little jerk.
Little known fact. Bobby grew up to be that Burn Notice spy…
(Just wondering who’ll be the first to pick Tom)
She never had any trouble firing my hormones! 
http://dev.metvnetwork.com/assets/images/jan314.jpg
She was gorgeous! :o
Cindy.
We told here to stay away from the hot stove with all that polyester on.
Then telling on her room mate in the burn ward for sneaking in a sandwich was just too much, and the janitor killed her (the janitor actually brought the sandwich in), but not before Bobby found out the Janitor’s plans. However, Bobby decided for once to keep his mouth shut and the Janitor was able to place the blame on him instead. Bobby’s sentencing will be handled in the next season.
This stuff practically writes itself.
My thoughts exactly. Guess who I’d kill on the Partridge Family…
Greg. I was about the right age at the time, replace him with me as Cousin Bob or whatever and put me in the attic bedroom, which I would selflessly share with Marcia.
Could I vote to kill Cousin Oliver? That’d be the only good reason to have him on the show at all - to watch him die a horrible, messy, nasty, long-drawn out death by being eaten by rabbits who’ve turned viscous and cut-throat after being coated with a toxic orange dye.
I’d read that by the end of the show’s run, Barry Williams had gotten sick of it and was already threatening to quit, so Schwartz & co had plans to write him out by sending him off to college. Perhaps they could’ve written a tinely episode in which Greg’s college girlfriend gets kidnapped by the SLA, brainwashed and then shoots him dead during a bank heist gone wrong.
Robert “Mike Brady” Reed was also on the verge of quitting / getting fired for being an insufferable dick behind the scenes. There was talk of actually killing his character off and having widowed Carol (and Alice) raise the kids alone.