Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh… yeah. :rolleyes:
Esprix
Ask the Gay Guy! (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, Asketh the damn Priest Guy!)
I must say that I have heard of capt. pike the first capt. of the enterprise but I thought he was dead. As for the other capt. as fore-mentioned I have not heard of him but would like to know more about him. P.S. people should remember that leanord nimoy AKA spock also did a cameo on the simpsons when springfield tried to build a monorail. I think william shatneris missunderstood and Ialso think he is actually funny in his ads. I do however think he needs to take it easy on the veno or manhattan’s that he drinks
Picard is bald.
Picard sounds French.
William Shatner still has his hair, proving he’s still young and virile.
We met Christopher Pike in the series premiere of “Star Trek” (TOS), but I do not recall if he was ever mentioned again. He has been used in several of the Star Trek novels.
As I said, they started a new book series based on a totally new captain (Calhoun) and crew on a totally new ship (I think the series is “New Frontiers”). It will never be made into a movie or TV show or anything - it exists solely in the novels. I’ve read a few and like them, although they’re not as complex as the other ST novel series.
I hope you were being sarcastic, as Shatner has the worst hairpiece in Hollywood history.
Esprix
“Never assume a malicious intent when stupidity will explain just as well.”
Ask the Gay Guy! (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, Asketh the damn Priest Guy!)
Ditto on the hairpiece.
If you’re going to list non-ST accomplishments, don’t forget LeVar Burton’s contribution to Reading Rainbow. Of course, if you don’t have a child of the appropriate age, I don’t guess you would know about that.
Esprix wrote:
Worse. She makes Janeway look like Katharine Hepburn.
Then again, anything makes Janeway look like Katharine Hepburn. “O-o-o-o-oh, look, Chakotay! The loo-oo-oo-oons are back!”
He appears again (Mostly in the form of footage from The Cage - the (first) pilot, rather than the premiere) in The Managerie - part one and two.
Eschew Obfuscation
Reasons Why Kirk’s Better Than Picard:
- Kirk never really got into that kinky “Jumpsuit” look.
- Kirk has sex more than once a season.
- One Word: Hair.
- Another word: Pretty-good-looking-can’t-see-the-weave-Wig.
- Kirk can beat up a Klingon bare-handed.
- Picard is a French man with an English accent.
- Kirk would date Beverly Crusher – and damn the consequences!!
- Kirk never drinks tea. Ever.
- Diplomacy for Kirk is a phaser and a smirk.
- Kirk would personally throw Wesley off his bridge.
- Two words: Shoulder Roll.
- Kirk doesn’t wear dresses when admirals arrive for lunch.
- Kirk once said: “I’ve got a belly-ache – and it’s a beauty.”
- Kirk would never sing to children in a crisis.
- Kirk can almost drive a stick shift.
- Kirk, almost singlehandedly, re-popualted the Earth’s whale population.
- Kirk say “Prime Directive? What Prime Directive?”
- Kirk knows 20th century curses.
- Kirk was NEVER infiltrated by the Borg and used against the Federation.
- Kirk ate little colored cubes and still remained relatively healthy.
- Kirk made do with obviously low performance technology.
- Kirk never pretends to be a barber in order to gain a tactical
advantage. - Kirk wasn’t shy about taking his shirt off – even around those pesky
Yeomans. - Kirk would never waste a Holodeck on something stupid like Dixon Hill.
- Kirk never once stood up and had to straighten his shirt.
- One word: Velour.
- Kirk can beat a Vulcan at chess.
- When Kirk was Picard’s age, he retired from Admiral and took to climbing
rocks. - When Picard was 37, he was only Captain of the lowly freighter,
Stargazer. When Kirk was 37, he was Captain of the flagship Enterprise. - Kirk liked a good belt of liquor every now and then.
- One word: Iman.
- Kirk looks good with a ripped shirt.
- If Kirk ever met a Ferengi, he would rip off its head and spit down its
neck. - Kirk says “Shoot first and wait for retaliation.”
- Kirk’s first officer NEVER tells him to stay on the bridge.
- Kirk never leaves the room to bawl somebody out.
- Kirk doesn’t rely on the wisdom of some dumb old janitor to get him out
of intergalacic scrapes. - Two words: Funky Sideburns.
- Kirk never asks his bartender for advice.
- Kirk never once said “Abandon ship! All hands abandon ship!”
- Kirk is not politically correct.
- Kirk never got “dumped” by a woman for an intergalactic busy body named
after a letter in the alphabet. - Kirk never wore green tights and frolicked about in Sherwood Forest.
- If there was ever a Klingon on Kirk’s bridge, Kirk would likely be dead.
- Ever hear of a bar shooter called “Make it so?” No? How about a “Beam me
up Scotty” then? See the difference? - One Word: Miniskirts.
- Kirk’s girlfriends always look good in soft light.
- Kirk never went anywhere without a whole bunch of guys in red shirts.
- Kirk’s first officer didn’t play some whimpy instrument like the
trombone. - Kirk had more dates than his first officer.
- Kirk is a leader, not a follower.
- If something doesn’t speak English – it’s toast.
- Kirk wasn’t some prissy archaeology fan.
- Picard’s middle name isn’t tough or awe-inspiring like Tiberius is.
- If Kirk finds a strange spinning probe, he blows it up.
- Picard hasen’t met Joan Collins.
- Picard flunked his enterance exams to Starfleet.
- Picard hasn’t fathered any children; Kirk – probably millions.
- Kirk has a cool phaser – not some pansy Braun mix-master.
- Two Words: Line Delivery.
- Picard grew up on a quaint little French vineyard, squishing grapes with
his toes, while Kirk slung bails of wheat and hay in Iowa to put himself
through school. - Kirk emphasizes his orations with pertinent hand gestures.
- Kirk once made a cannon out of bamboo, sulphur, potassium nitrate,
charcoal, and then fired diamonds into the hearts of his enemies. (Need we
say more?) - Kirk is not put off by green skin.
- Kirk knows how to deal with peace loving hippy goofs.
- Kirk once fought a Greek god. And won.
- Kirk barely asks for suggestions. And if he does, he asks Spock only.
- Kirk doesn’t let the doctor tell him what to do.
- One Word: Fisticuffs.
- Kirk’s name is hated throughtout the galaxy.
- Kirk appreciates Shakespeare, but he doesn’t let it show.
- You can never lock up Kirk for very long.
- Kirk’s eulogies can actually make you cry.
- Kirk plays god with lesser cultures, and then exploits them for
resources. - Kirk’s son would never drop out to become a musician.
- Kirk can climb up a Jeffries Tube and fix anything.
- Kirk never hired an engineer with punk glasses.
- The Klingons didn’t have a word for surrender – until they met Kirk.
- Kirk’s bridge isn’t beige.
- Two Words: Crane Shots.
- Picard likes wimpy violin music – and coerces Data into playing it.
- Picard allows cats on board, while Kirk beams away even really cute
things, like Tribbles. - Kirk is a cultural icon – Picard is just some guy who’s really nice.
- Kirk specifically ordered a swivel LA-Z-BOY for the bridge.
- Kirk would never touch SYNTHAHOL.
- Kirk looks distinguished in reading glasses – and nobody dares to call
him “four eyes.” - Kirk can infiltrate Gangsters, Nazis, and even the Pentagon – easily.
- Picard likes painting nudes, for art’s sake.
- When Kirk doesn’t trust the Romulans, he fires at them. When Picard
doesn’t trust the Romulans, he gets fired at. - Kirk never once, ever, wore a Speedo banana hammock on shore leave.
- Kirk never gets his command codes locked out by some pimply acting
ensign. - Kirk doesn’t test the engines – he just fires them up.
- When Kirk says “Boldly Go,” he means it.
- Three Words: Flying Leg Kick.
- Picard’s crew would never ever think of him as a sexual object.
- Kirk traveled through The Great Barrier, met God, and wasn’t even
impressed. - Kirk’s bedroom is a passion pit with electric sheets.
- Kirk would never let his Chief of Security wear a ponytail.
- One Word: Balls.
Oh wait… I prefer Picard…
Dpr.
You really should credit “The First Church of Shatnerology” homepage for that list you’ve posted, unless that’s your page.
Sometimes, Esprix, I think you take the world too seriously. Why not post a smile?
Uh, ok.
Actually, I don’t take the world seriously - I just like to discuss. I talk too much. And I’m very, very weird.
Esprix
Ask the Gay Guy! (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, Asketh the damn Priest Guy!)
“Never assume a malicious intent when stupidity will explain just as well.”
{This space reserved for a Genuine WallyM7 Sig™}
That’s better.
That’s my territory! My attorneys will be in touch, sucker!
Cecil said it. I believe it. That settles it.
Relax, I’m not as Dave as I look!- A Wallified sig!
Whenever my friend Tam calls someone else weird, they usually respond by looking at him horrified since he’s the weirdest person in the universe, to which he replies, “Hey, I’m in the middle - I can point fingers.”
No, seriously - no one is weirder. Anywhere.
Probably explains why I’m still in love with him. {SIGH}
Esprix
Ask the Gay Guy! (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, Asketh the damn Priest Guy!)
“Never assume a malicious intent when stupidity will explain just as well.”
{This space reserved for a Genuine WallyM7 Sig™}
Picard. He’s classy, he’s noble, and I don’t recall witnessing him sexually harassing anyone.
“We must jump up and down and down, and around and around.”
- Tori Amos
Ok, so we’ve debated who would beat who in the captain department. But what about first officers?
I’ve come up with a few questions, you tell me if you agree with the results…
- Who would be best confronting an unknown and dangerous alien?
My vote would be for Kira. Spock would try to analyze it, Riker would try to seduce it, and Chakotay would try to bond with it. Kira would kill it first, ask questions later. - Who stands up to the captain the best?
My vote here is tied between Spock and Kira. Spock was just the perfect comedic and dramatic foil for Kirk, and Kira would just kick Sisko’s A**. Riker loses, but just by default; Picard could put ANYbody down. Chakotay, on the other hand,is just pathetic. Janeway has him whipped. - Who gets the best girl (or guy?)
Hmmm…another tough one. Riker wins by sheer volume; although kudos to Kira for snagging a shapeshifter (think about that for a second, will ya?) Spock gets points for his Vulcan mating disease every 7 years. Again, Chakotay comes up the big loser…has he done anything but pine away for Janeway?
Anyway, my results for best first officer, are, in order, Kira, Spock, Riker, and Chakotay. Any thoughts or feedback?
Just to clarify here: Picard gets more than Kirk, Riker, Paris, and whomever the womanizer is on DS9 combined… the difference is, he’s discreet about it. He doesn’t need his crew and millions of TV viewers to watch, just so long as HE’S there.
“There are only two things that are infinite: The Universe, and human stupidity-- and I’m not sure about the Universe”
–A. Einstein
Welcome to the SDMB! FTR, you’re responding to a thread from 23 years ago, which is also the last time the poster you’re responding to was active. I don’t think they’re gonna see your response.
It’s spam. Look at where the link actually goes. (hint: there’s an extra “t”.