A distant far away dream . . . . .
Okay, here goes with the stupidity…
Other than the general (Make love, have sex, fuck), we have a cue that transcends language. My husband makes this noise… “Ggrrrrrrrrrrr”. That’s the universal signal (in my personal universe) for hot and steamy sex.
I have heard the ‘bumpin’ uglies’ one, though…in a movie. It was Coal Miner’s Daughter, and ever since then, hearing someone say it make me think automatically of Ed Harris. This is not conducive to sex in my house, however.
Given the age of my ex (20 years older than me) I used to refer to it as “sweatin’ to the oldies”.
My current SO just asks me if I’d like a horsey ride 
That is very funny. LMFAO.
Doin’ it, and doin’ it, and doin’ it well…
(My particular favorite still has to be ‘the making of the beast with two backs’.)
I had this braod for a while that was not exactually, um, faithful. Eventually I tired of forgiving her. She was horny one night, & wanted to fuck but I had to turn her down by saying "Nahh, I think if you don’t mind & don’t want to do “Suicide” tonight.
Took us about ten minutes to stop laughing, get back into character & start fightig over it.
Damn, Dark Brown already posted my favorite: riding the balony pony. I love that.
Of course, I never actually call it in practice, as it decreases the chances of actually getting to do it. So I stick with “have sex”, “make love”, or “fuck”, depending on the mood.
Zanshin already caught my favorite. It’s most notable origin is in Shakespeare’s Othello.
Iago: I am one, sir, that comes to tell you your daughter and the Moor are now making the beast with two backs.
I could also reference a particularly descriptive euphemism from Henry IV:
And lo, do I see that my ladies’ bulldog hath been eating porrige again?
*its most notable origin…
sorry…
making a deposit in the sausage wallet
poking the whiskers
Tucking the Turkey
Macking
** Sweet Dreams ** was the movie Ed said it in.
Oh yeah! smacks forehead I get my female country singers mixed up. Patsy Cline, right?..and Coal Miner’s Daughter was Loretta Lynn?
Thanks for the heads up!
From Lonesome Dove - “wanna poke?”
Gah, this is an actual euphemism for it?! I had no idea… and… eh… :eek:
[rambling personal story that explains my surprise]
When my ex and I had been dating about two months, long distance, I went up to visit him for New Year’s. My ovaries hate me, and I got my period the day I went to visit him. I wasn’t planning on having sex with him anyways (I was a virgin), but we were planning on doing some… ahem… other activities, so we were both disappointed, but I decided to treat him to some “other activities” anyway. Damn my oral fixation. So it was a good weekend. My best friend was also the boyfriend’s best friend, that’s how I met the ex, and he (friend) later asked me how the weekend went, specifically asking me if I had had sex with him. (the friend was all big brother-ish throughout that relationship) I said no, with implication that no, no sex, but other stuff, but I didn’t actually say anything about the other stuff. All this came up later at some point, I think friend made innuendo about the other stuff and my reply was "Hey, all I said was that we didn’t have sex. For all you know, we spent the whole weekend playing Parcheesi."
[/rambling personal story]
So now you can imagine my consternation upon learning people actually call it “playing Parcheesi.” :smack:
And as for my contribution to the thread topic…
Porkin’.
I’m fairly certain that’s not from Henry IV… :eek:
A very rare short rest at a cool wet oasis in the long slog through the hot dry miserable desert of my life.
Doing the laundry.
And if it’s a small load, I’ll do it by hand.
punching the clown.
Cheech -> “… you wanna ride the Love Machine?”