Shameless plug of my thread :
peace,
Congratulations!
You have been selected as the December Lunatic of the Month!
WSBB: I can’t wait for the response to this.
It follows promptly. First, let me venture a guess: you are a female. Or a very emotional male. I ventured my guess not to show you how insightful I am (actually, I am not). Your inconsistency strikes me: On one hand, you blame every sin in the world on me. On the other, you can’t get of my personality: you want to know everything about me, including my area code. Why is that? This MB allows you to skip all my messages. Yet you keep on reading AND responding to them!
You might spoil me: I’ll become proud that CA chicks chase me (on MB, though). It really tickles. If you really need to know details of my private life: shoe size: 10, neck size: 161/2, what else?
SAMCLEM: I got interested in “Why a plain familiar ‘bartender’ was moved aside by a funny sounding (and even pretentious) ‘mixologist’ “? It whetted my curiosity, but not as much as “Why there was a Big Bang”? So, I did an admittedly quick search. It returned (wrong) ‘1948’ as the date of origin. Other peoples’ sources gave earlier date(s). The triviality of the topic did not warrant more than a few minutes of my time. Perhaps, this topic was dear to you. In which case you could have researched it at depth, synopsysed and reported your results to grateful fellow SDopers.
Instead you accusing me of stating my opinions. And of posting facts which “reinforce” them. But of course! Do you expect me to search for the facts which reinforce other’s opinion? I will not do it, at least not for free.
So, in the foreseeable future, I intend to state here MY OPINIONS. If I choose, I will quote other opinions "reinforcing” mine. If my opinions strike you as unorthodox, you may discuss them at the spot or bring them to the Pit.
Ducky, after long and tedious analysis , I spotted an inconsistency: in this thread you claimed to be a WASP. In another one you said, about your great-grandfathers that If they hadn’t been allowed in, I’d be shoveling snow in Prague instead of in Illinois.
I wonder: was your Bohemian great-grandfather an AS living in Prague or did you used the grim picture of snow shoveling in Prague as a figure of speech and you are a real AS? As in 100% WASP?
You see, I am a nice guy (no kidding, I mean it). I do not care about your ethnicity. I like you as an intellectual, i.e. I like your intellectual output, as I read it here. I thought I mention the discrepancy in order to illustrate my point: these details about our personal real lives might be cute, but irrelevant. If you insist, I can tell you the most intimate details of myself, like the brand of my toothpaste or the size of my condom (ooops!) they all are one size!), but you do not really care!
Peace
Dad? Is that you?
Yes, Susan! “Diane” is yor handle, right, honey?
I found this: Know ignorance, Know peace in your profile. I know, my girl: you did it for daddy!
Grategul Dad. I mean, Peace
Ha ha, jokes over dad, you big goofball. You almost had these people believing that you really are an illiterate, incoherent, backwoods dipshit.
Yeah, Susi, tell the mothefuckers about me! So, they will apreciate the gold when they see it! No more pretending! Here I am with all my brainpower! Per aspera ad astra! With me at the helm!
Peace
I think we may have just crossed the line from incomprehensibility to lunatic ravings.
Alright, I’m somewhat new here and usually just lurk about and read the boards, but this thread caught my eye. I think that I’ve finally pinned down what Peace reminds me of. His is like a poor ignorant puppy that shits all over the floor, and no matter how many times you show it the error of its ways, it keeps on shitting all over the place. Perhaps after much laying down of newspaper all over the message board, he’ll learn to stop spewing shit all over it.
( | ) <== represents my attempt at a ‘smilie’ asshole
how about
( )o( )
Karl and Jb, both assholes are good.
Karl, first, I badmouthed you (I frankly regret it) because I did not like you simplification of kidney, you compared Henle’s loop or something to a coffee pot. Then I decided that it was not that bad, as a first approach to familiarize the SDoppers with the mysteries of their golden pee origin. Then I saw you were above that: you adopted my phrase as your motto and were courageous enough to cite me. Now you try yourself as an asshole designer (or is it ‘a designer of assholes’? – E is my SL, tell me the correct one).
My idea: ( <O> )
( )o( ), ( I )Peace
peace, thank you for providing a shining example of why we’re all jumping on you. No, I am not a female. I am a male (I don’t know how “emotional” I am), as I stated, pay attention now, IN THIS VERY SAME FUCKING THREAD! In either case, the way you worded your ignorant assumption of my gender/disposition fully warrants me opening up a can (no, make it a case) of whup-ass on your ptitful soul. I assume (you’re not the only one who can do it) that by referring to me as a female or an “emotional male” that I am not capable of reasoning. Well, peace, on our planet that type of remark is at best considered sexist (not sexy , don’t get all excited and start expounding upon the clitoris again), at worst utterly barbaric. This kind of jackass worldview is why you have 3 pit threads going about you. Doesn’t that tell you anything? Or do you just like the attention.
Look, Mr. Size 10, I didn’t blame every sin in the world on you. I’m fairly sure you had nothing to do with the recent theft of my car, for example; but then again, since you won’t tell me where you live, how can I be certain?
peace, I don’t give a dead rat’s colon where you live, what you do, etc. I just brought it up because somebody else did, and you refused to answer them. The reason they asked was because you’re always giving vague clues as to where you’re from, what your credentials are, etc., then getting totally paranoid and defensive whenever anybody asks you for specifics. As I previously stated, I’m perfectly content to believe you come from the moon and live in Mayberry, RFD.
Why do I keep replying to you? Because your mangling of both logic and language always make me laugh/cringe, and give me plenty of stories to store up for the grandchildren. You simultaneously captivate and repulse me, like a traffic accident or a mime. So I’ll continue to respond to you just for the yuks it’ll give me to read your responses.
BTW, thanks for the neck/shoe size info. It’s going into the secret government database as we speak. Donkey.
[quote]
originally posted by woodstockbirdybird
Hey! not all mimes are the white-faced fuckos, y’know. Watch it, or I’ll be forced to open up an invisible can (or case) of the ol’ WhupAss.
jb,
emphatically not stuck in a box
I wasn’t going to come back in here, but I can’t let this particular one go.
This is what I said, in this thread http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=52374&pagenumber=1
I would be interested in hearing what you thought the ethnic composition of Czechoslovakia was. This bit here–“was your Bohemian great-grandfather an AS living in Prague or did you used the grim picture of snow shoveling in Prague as a figure of speech and you are a real AS? As in 100% WASP?”–sounds like you don’t think that Czechoslovakians are Anglo-Saxons. What are they, then? Slavs? Just because it’s sometimes called a “Slavic” land doesn’t mean that it’s wall-to-wall Slavs, and that there aren’t any white Anglo-Saxon Protestants living there.
And how important is it, to be able to say one is “100% Anglo-Saxon”? As in, “I’m a real Anglo-Saxon.” Dunno how it is where you are, but not where I live, buddy. No way.
And just to set the record totally, absolutely straight, I never said I had a “Bohemian” great-grandfather. I said I had seven other great-grandfathers who came to America. (But looking back over what I wrote, I can see where you might assume that. Oh, well…) In point of fact, it was one of my great-grandmothers who was from Prague, and in using Prague as an illustration, yes, I suppose I was waxing a bit poetic. I could just as easily have said Darmstadt or Copenhagen, but I liked the sound of “Prague” better. So sue me.
Oh, and Woodstockbirdybird, were you the one who was asking about “brockened” English? I believe the word we’re looking for here is “broken” English.
I am sorry, WSBB, if I hurt your feelings. It was a good example to show you that I am not sexy, I mean, sexist: I remembered that you managed a bookstore in Oakland, CA, but you sex did not stick. Sorry, and do not see more than there is. May I suggest to you what I think is the (a) reason you read my posts: they might be stupid, irrelevant, etc., but more often than not they are amusing and might be stored up for the grandchildren. On rare occasion they might contain a thought or two.
Women are always portrayed by comedians as hyperemotional idiots, and men as unemotional hulks. So, being ‘an emotional man’ is a complement. Besides, being emotional does not mean being illogical.
The info about my whereabouts is still classified; sorry about your former car; what else is new in Oakland?
Ducky, honey, you are unfair to old Peacey: I asked you straight: was your great-granny a WASP from Prague (Bohemia)? Precisely because I am aware of the fact that in a European country 100% of ethnic majority is impossible. In Prague, with its large German population, in particular. Being a German makes him a likely Saxon. Although not exactly Anglo-Saxon, but it is unimportant. As I said, any ethnicity is OK, as long as the person is OK. It is OK in IL, it is OK in my state. The whole thing was TIC (tongue-in-cheek), to show you that we are all human, that inaccuracies and slips will crawl into our posts no matter what and even Peace does not deserve his balls fried if he misspoke.
I coined “brockened” English and would not allow hijacking.
Peace
Yeah, peace, I admit it: you’re amusing. You definitely make me laugh. So to return the favor, I’ll finish off in peace-ese, so you can be amused as well:
peace, I know (by which mean know: v.,to perceive directly: have understanding or direct cognition of; also: to recognize the nature of; ergo, I see no reason to continue subjecting myself to duck egg tatertot hillbilly laxative - I appallogize if this is unclear, i intended no, E is SL) we gout off on the wrong feet, but I would like to make amendments for this. At first after reading a few of your posts, I assumed you were the kind of pretentious 16 year-old loser we all knew and hated in high school, who would end up a bitter adult complaining that nobody recognized your genius. Now that I know you better, though, I realize you’re a manure individual with a bright furnture. I wish you luck with a capital “F”.
Cereally, though, let’s try to put this unpheasant episodic behind us.
VERBATIM: I realize you’re a manure individual with a bright furnture
Tx. I laughed. Only one puzzle: “furnture”. Is it ‘future’ modified by ‘furniture’ or … ?
Piece
Damn, damn, damn. Of course I meant “furniture”. Shoulda seen that.
Then again, since I was attempting to speak peace-ese, I could always claim I intended to misspell “furniture”…