Nah, but I really, really want an I am a Cellist God shirt.
Took me a second on that one 
Nah, too pretentious for me, but this guy is a hoot. I remember back when he had the Jesus.com domain and got a LOT of shit for it from fundy types.
Nope. I know too many pseudo-intellectual uberspirital hippie dudes already. If I want to date one, I’ll find one closer to my tent.
Nope, I don’t date guys with long hair. 
PS: Love the WIN A CHANCE TO SHOWER WITH JESUS ad at the bottom of that page.
If this was the biblical Jesus, it would be a bit intimidating meeting the in-laws…
I can only imagine the Easter holiday pranks …
You know, there are some places in this country where getting a date with someone named Jesus isn’t all that special…
I can see how there would be both pros and cons to dating Jesus.
Pros:[ul]
[li]Never run out of wine[/li][li]You won’t need health insurance[/li][li]The guy has some great stories to tell[/li][li]His birthday’s on Christmas, so you only have to get him half the presents[/li][/ul]
Cons:[ul]
[li]Those fishing buddies of his always hanging around[/li][li]He won’t ever let you win an argument[/li][li]Doesn’t have a place of his own[/li][li]His ride? A donkey[/li][/ul]
Damn, I’m too old.
Jesus likes death metal and punk rock? Boy, was my mom wrong.
A friend of mine had a crazy Missouri Synod Lutheran wedding and the preacher just went on and on and on about the husband being the head of the household as Jesus is the head of the Church. At one point, he said that he’d asked many women if they would submit happily to their husband . . . if their husband was just like Jeeeeezus and they all said yes!
At this point I nearly fell out of the pew.
Um, let’s see:
He cursed a fig tree when it didn’t have any fruit for him. Plus there was the whole moneychangers bit. Bit of an anger management problem, I’d say.
He told people to leave their families and follow him. Not a lot of respect for the marital bond, there, regardless of what the “family values” crowd would have you think of Him.
Several times in the Gospels He was mean to His mother. Not a good sign.
Plus, talk about having an overbearing father-in-law. “Dear, my Father says I am to die this weekend.” “Oh hell no! You’ve been promising you’d clean out the garage for a month!”
I sent some e-mail to him a while ago. I don’t remember how exactly circumcision came up, or how that lead to do a discussion of penises in general and his in particular. I am sure of one thing though-
I’m bigger than Jesus
Ouch, dude!
Yeah, in addition to “No micks, please!” you’ve got:
Does this mean that He is a Nazi?
(I’m actually going to e-mail the guy and ask for an explanation. That’s seriously bizarre, unless it’s a joke)
So I send him:
Uh, Jesus,
What do you have against Irish people? Unless this was a joke, in which case, just call me Emily Litella.
Sincerely,
Guin
P.S. even %100 juice is nothing more than sugar and not very good for you.
Let’s see if he answers!
He wants a Germanic woman, is interested in the culture of Northern Europe, lists 3 German composers as favorites, and pagan band fronted by a neoNazi murderer and arsonist
I’m not sure the site is a joke. He could really be that crazy.
I did not mean to imply that anybody who loves German composers is a Nazi. But, many American Nazis have a fanatical belief that Germany produces the best of everything (music, beer, philosophers, sausages, etc) and that every prominent German in history held Nazi views.
Wow. That’s really scary. Eeep!
(BTW, the whole “Germanic-Nordic” Blonde and blue-eyed stereotype always makes me laugh. Weren’t the Scandinavians redheads? And blonde hair comes from the Slavic people).
What disturbs me the most is that their albums sound very interesting. So, it’s a German band whose early work was about Tolkien, and whose later work were about Norse/Teutonic myths? I’ll have to listen to some clips. The ambient ones sound like they would make a great gift for my dad.