While going through John Peel’s Peelenium (his list of exemplary songs from every year of 20th century), I was astounded to read (there is a short list of three “main events” after each year):
The laziest man in the world got up after 29 years in bed. James Thomson from Ulster was forced out of bed when his 80 year old mother became too ill to look after him.
I was so staggered, that I left my musical agenda and tried to dig up some more information on Mr. Thomson’s lifestyle, but to no avail. I couldn’t google my way out, neither could I find anything in the online news archives (one would think this is the perfect fill-in unimportant backpage story, or at a journalist would think that, judging from what they generally drool upon).
So, can anybody discover the facts, and while we’re on it, can anybody nominate a better pretender for the title?
PS I did write to Cecil before realizing that this is the place to start.
It seems worth noting that there probably isn’t going to be a lot to talk about the life of the world’s laziest man. One of those definitional things.
Can I try out? My wife told me once, “If you were any lazier, you’d be dead.”
How about these guys who wind up weighing 1200 punds? They seem to spend their time eating and lying in bed. What makes people do this? i’d rather be dead.
Fair enough. Although being lazy doesn’t necessarily mean uneventful. After all, laziness is only genuine when confronted with a required effort. This would mean that, admittedly somewhat paradoxical, there is an immense amount of sheer will exerted in being truly lazy. Or, as Jerome K. Jerome brilliantly put it:
*There are plenty of lazy people and plenty of slow-coaches, but a genuine idler is a rarity. He is not a man who slouches about with his hands in his pockets. On the contrary, his most startling characteristic is that he is always intensely busy.
It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do. There is no fun in doing nothing when you have nothing to do. Wasting time is merely an occupation then, and a most exhausting one. Idleness, like kisses, to be sweet must be stolen.
*
But that’s all beside the original point of discussion. Apparently voluntary numbness is indeed the criteria that was used in measuring the indolence of James Thomas, and here you are right. However, obviously some information has reached the ears of John Peel (or his eyes) and unless it is a joke I didn’t get (all very possible), or a reference to a notable person, someone, somewhere marked this unremarkable life remarkable, which is in itself very interesting.
I’m having my mom type this for me.
People that obese almost always have some sort of malfunction in their endocrine systems which cause them to put on that much weight. Your average creative loafer won’t be able to get their mass that high.
I’m dictating this to my mom, who’s repeating it into the voice mail of my Bangalore-based virtual assistant, who will type for me.
There’s a Chinese folktale about the laziest man in the world.
His wife planned to go visit her mom in the next province. But she would be gone for a month, and her husband was too lazy to feed himself. So she hit on a clever plan. She baked 30 large biscuits, strung them on a cord, and hung it around his neck. That way he would have food supplied to him until her return.
When she returned, she found that he had starved to death. Having eaten all the biscuits in front of him, he’d been too lazy to pull the cord to get the ones from behind.
That is far too difficult to understand. I need a nap!
I heard of this Lewbowski fella, he calls himself ‘the Dude’. Quite possibly the laziest man in all of Los Angeles County, which would place him high in the running for laziest worldwide.
I asked my pal to dictate this to my cat who being unable to type will just have a nap.
I’ll be in my bunk, don’t disturb me, I’m knackered after typing this
True sloth was perfected in the 19th century by Goncharov’s character Oblomov (also: Oblomov). In Russian, oblomovščina, or oblomovism, is used to refer to a lifestyle of ultimate laziness. I would say that both the book and the film are well worth your time.
But what if there are two equally lazy people, one is recognized as The Laziest Man Ever, the other living in total obscurity. Wouldn’t having the title and the extra thoughts that might cause make one a little less lazy than the other?
You can read about Thompson’s big day in the March 23 1908 edition of the Evening Telegram. (Direct link to the article.)
If you look at the news story trends for “laziest man”, you’ll find an interesting pattern, with a peak of interest right around the time the Thompson story came out. The more recent bulge concerns mostly hyperbole but “lazy people” stories appear to have been quite popular around 1910. Compare:
“Laziest man” 2000-2009
“Laziest man” 1900-1919
Nice reasoning, but to level two people’s laziness, so that the balance could be tipped by only the title, you’d need a stern criteria for measurement of sloth, which we haven’t yet formulated (and it seems we’ve made only few half-steps in this direction in the present discussion, rather disappointingly). Also, as I mentioned before, notable and title-winning indolence would have to be put in perspective with the possibilities one has and refuses to take for no apparent reason at all, or, indeed, in defiance of any logical reasoning and benefits. And in the end, if one is to qualify for the title, then inevitably it would be straining away from the ideal state of laziness. After all, every competition needs some sort of restrictions, a defined frame in which comparisons would be made. For example, Usain Bolt isn’t really and undeniably the fastest man in the world. He is, in reality, the fastest man that has competed in a timed run on a track with people in similar conditions for a distance of 100m and 200m.
Still, I love the paradox taste this idea has.
Ashamed as I am, I must confess I haven’t heard of him. Sounds very interesting though, I’ll look for the book as soon as I can (yes, there are translations in the public domain, but since I’m Bulgarian, reading a Russian author in english seems like a step in the wrong direction, and I don’t know russian well enough to read the original text). Thanks for the reference.
And a film directed by Mikhalkov certainly sounds worth watching.
Now that’s a job well done! I have little else to say. Just goes to show how different people with the same resources vary in their success - I swear I’ve been through the same google news archives, but just couldn’t locate the story.:rolleyes:
Otherwise, as you say, an interesting pattern.
I’ll have my mother read it to me, as soon as she finds it.
hh’s mother
(as dictated at 12:01 a.m.)
Could somebody spoil this thread for me? I just couldn’t get around to reading it.