In honor of the upcoming Halloween season, I submit the following:
In Bram Stoker’s original novel Dracula, the titilar character is a nightmarish undead fiend. Unfortunately, he has since been badly degraded, to the point where we now have… -Count Chocula. A few others come to mind: The Count, from Sesame Street; Duckula; etc. Ole’ Vlad must be spinning in his coffin.
So who wins your vote for the sorriest travesty of Stoker’s original villian?
How 'bout that vampire from the X-files?
“blah, blah, blah, the body jumped up and tried to bite the coroners jugular.”
“Was he killed?”
“No, just kind of… gnawed on.”
Count Chocula! The cereal vampire, he strikes young children early in the morning.
How about Bunnicula, the vampire rabbit of a series of children’s books?
Hmmm, the *least[i/] scariest vampire…
Well, there was Vampular the Space Vampire from the original 60’s Space Ghost cartoon.
He was originally a traditional Shakespearian actor but financial problems forced him to take lessor gigs to pay the bills. Sadly, after his supporting role as the smaller of the two globby things on The Herculoids (Gleep, I think) dried up he went into seclusion and finished up a bitter alcoholic.
Looking at the old tapes you can just tell he didn’t have his heart in the role. In my opinion, not scary.
Then there was Count Fangula from The Thirteen Ghosts of Scooby Doo. He was fired after publicly bad-mouthing Scrappy Doo’s prima donna attitude and on-set temper tantrums in Variety. Luckily he bounced back and today you might recognize him as the vampire in the Monster Chomps cookie commercials. My judgement: comic relief, not scary.
Don’t forget Grandpa from “The Munsters.”
the Count from sesame Street. I cant believe that no one mentioned him
The OP did.
How about that guy from A Polish Vampire in Burbank? Too squeemish to get blood on his own, his parents (also vampires) had to bring him blood in blood bags.
Nancy, the salt vampire, in that Star Trek episode.
How about Vampirella, companion comic to Cousin Eerie and Uncle Creepy? She was the sort of vamp you’d look forward to meeting.
The least scariest vampire would have to be me, about 4 Halloweens ago.
I make a great zombie, though.
The movie Lifeforce was based on a book called The Space Vampires.
Mine would have to be Count Floyd from old Second City re-runs. Anybody remember him?
Way back about 15 years ago, there used to be a vampire on TV named Count Scary who would “scare the pants off of you”. I think he was just local to the Detroit area though.
How 'bout Eddie Murphy’s “Vampire in Brooklyn”. That was scary because it was frighteningly bad.
Lauren Hutton and Clevon Little in “Once Bitten”
George Hamilton in “Love at First Bite”
Leslie Nielsen in “Dead and Loving It”
Remember the vampire on “Electric Company” from the Childrens Television Workshop way back when?
If I’m not mistaken, it was Morgan Freeman. Great way to start a great career!
Not best or worst vampire, I guess, but maybe the best actor to play one?
How about a vegetarian vampire duck Duckula .
Do I win?
My vote is for Spike, on BtVS, now that he can’t actually hurt anybody. He’s funny as hell, though.
Also, wasn’t there a movie where Jim Carrey was a vampire? That’d be my other vote.
ANYONE in “Dark Shadows,” one of the funniest shows of the 1960s. “This is the tomb of my incestors . . . Did I say incestors? Of course, I meant ANcestors.”
Oh, and Bela Lugosi and his chiropractor “double” in “Plan Nine from Outer Space.”