If someone kills a thread, are they liable for anything? Who knows what magical direction that thread might have gone into if it wasn’t for the threadkiller?
What would the appropriate charge for a threadkiller be in a court of law? Murder sounds a bit harsh, but perhaps the message board equivalent of manslaughter might be doable.
Threadslaughter.
And would there be distinctions of threadslaughter? What would the difference between first-degree threadslaugther and second-degree threadslaughter be?
Responses from attorneys would be particularly useful.
[sub]Yes, it’s silly, I know. Yes, I’ll take my medicine again and sit quietly in a corner for a while.[/sub]
I think the term you’re looking for is threadicide, but threadslaughter has a nice ring to it. It sounds more dire.
Degrees of severity of this crime would probably hinge on the number of posts in the thread before its demise. Let’s say a one page thread (at 50 posts per page) is first degree, two pages is second degree, etc.
Here’s some punishment ideas:
Replace the tired hamsters for one hour per degree.
Writing “I will not kill threads” 100 times for each degree.
Forcing the poster to put “Convicted Threadkiller” in their sig or as their title under their user name, and they have to go thread to thread introducing themselves so that we know that they’re out there.
Put a sticky thread in each forum entitled “Convicted Threadkillers” and add their name to the growing list.
Reduce their post count by the number of posts in the slaughtered thread.
If the offender repeats this offense on a regular basis, then they are branded with the title “Serial Threadkiller”
And if they meant to contribute mightily to the topic, but their post failed to garner further responses, they could be guilty of involuntary thread slaughter.
I’m not so sure about threadicide, at least not in the cases that I have killed a thread. Usually I don’t mean to kill a thread, so I would much prefer to be charged with involuntary threadslaughter. I’m not a bad person!!
What about ending a thread? NOT that I will end this thread but let’s suppose someone starts a thread “What is the longest 1 vowel, 1 syllable word?” Then (‘since Dopers’ are highly intelligent), a few seconds later someone posts “STRENGTHS”.
Technically, isn’t this killing the thread? Should a thread be expected to have a “life” of a certain number of responses?
Even if we knew the answer, should we be obliged to post a courteous “Gee, that’s a good one. I’ll research that further”.
OR if some rude person posts the answer too early, is it mandatory that other Dopers continue to post “answers” until the thread meets the requsite number of postings?
Geez, what a can of worms this is.
Well, I’d have to be locked up, at the least, under your laws.
I don’t think it’s a crime, actually. The blame rests with all the people who COULD have posted after me, but didn’t. They might at least have said “What a stupid and pointless post” if nothing else. I absolve myself from all blame.
Interesting point. I visualize a sort of “hot potato” played by posters trying to get a thread up a certain post count by also trying not to be the last one. Or would that be more akin to musical chairs?
And to bring up a related item, what about moderators locking threads? Does that make them professional hitmen/hitwomen? Euthanasists? What happens if they lock a thread but don’t post? Does that last poster get stuck unfairly with “threadslaughterer” being whispered as they post nearby?
Perhaps we need some designated thread killers who will do this job for us. If you see that they have posted in the thread, then that’s it, threaddy’s dead. Of course, that can’t be much fun for them if they have a point they’d like to discuss.
I’m glad I’m not the last poster in this thread. :whew smiley:
Just as police officers are sometimes required to use deadly force to subdue a criminal, moderators and administrators are empowered to lock threads in the interests of the SDMB Community. Consider it justifiable threadslaughter.
Beware, sometimes you kill a thread, and then, just as you relax, the Jasonesque thread rises up and once again needs killing. Like a stake through the vampire’s heart, unless a thread has the moderator’s “magic lock”, can you really say for sure: “The thread is dead”?
Biotop does present an interesting point. What, aside from a locked thread, constitutes “thread death”? Is it when the thread’s heart stops? When there is no brain activity left in the thread? (lotsa dead threads around here most of the time, if that :p) When the thread can only be kept alive artificially? (Like I am doing now?)