I got my first glurgy Christmas email today, courtesy of one of the ladies here at work. It’s actually one of the better ones I’ve seen; it’s phrased as a letter from Jesus, and basically says “Hey, I’m God, I can take care of myself”. There are a few bizarre things in there though; apparently, Jesus doesn’t want you shopping at a store on Sunday if the store’s clerks are under orders from management to say “happy holidays”. Oh, and you can’t understand Christmas like Jesus can until you have kids. Yeah.
This year, I’ve taken it upon myself to completely sort through the holiday items Mom has in storage, donating or disposing of things that haven’t been used in a decade or so, or have no meaning to either of us. Last night, I located several dozen saved Christmas card sets, mostly from the late '70s or early '80s. If they weren’t so yellowed, I would use them this year – the photography is hilarious. But, back to the cleanup…I’m pitting hideous ornaments that I’m not allowed to trash because they were given to us by dear relatives. They just sit in the storage boxes, taking up space. Grr.
Set box on floor. Stomp it flat. Toss box.
If anyone ever asks about any of them (and really, would anybody?) say, “Oh, I had to throw it out, it got damaged.”
Tangentially holiday related only through possible holiday drinking.
My BIL did jury duty on a DWI that used gingivitis as the defense, claiming the alcohol pooled in the packets. He’s a doctor and, well, not brain dead, and that didn’t fly with him. He convinced the other jurors.
I’m surprised that anyone required convincing. I’m also surprised that a lawyer pushing that defense would allow a doctor on the jury. But damn - besides the despicability of the DWI, what kind of fucktard blames their alchohol level reading on their gums?
When I was a young lass (as in, before I turned, maybe, 35 or so), radio stations started playing the occasional Christmas tune in with their music mix after Thanksgiving (or maybe on Thanksgiving); that’s OK. I’m good with that.
However, here in the godforsaken part of WV I live in, we have three types of radio stations: Country (do NOT want!), Christian (DO NOT WANT!) and “mixed popular music from the 70s, 80s, 90s and today. . .with no rap or hard rock, ever”. The latter only has one station. It’s what I’m tuned into in my car (hey, I’m old; shoot me). Starting on Thanksgiving, they turned to all Christmas music, all the time. Aaaacccckkkk!
Now, I like Christmas music. OK, I’m still waiting to hear them play the Bing Crosby/David Bowie version of Little Drummer Boy, but in the meantime, I’m digging Dolly Parton pairing with Rod Steward on Baby, It’s Cold Outside (I can ignore the date-rape implication lyrics well enough. . .) and anything by Manheim Steamroller or the Carpenters (Karen had the most beautiful voice!)
But seriously, do I really need to hear a whole month of all-Christmas-all-the-time music?
I don’t think so!
Oh, and Gfactor, great move on the Carol Stream decision. Long due, if you ask me.
That would work, but most of these are made of some kind of resin…it would take more than a stomping to take care of the problem.
That’s what it sounds like; here’s the actual quote from the email: “How I personally feel about this celebration can probably be most easily understood by those of you who have been blessed with children of your own.”
Well, if Jesus is God, and we’re all God’s children, then obviously Jesus is our daddy, too. Simple logic.
That just sounds wrong.
I’m glad I’m an atheist, that sort of thing makes my head hurt. For me, Christmas is about giving presents to people you love because you love them and it’s fun to exchange gifts, and convenient to have an “officially recognized” day on which to do it (other than birthdays, that is).
My family has several annoying members who have been in recent years whining about the “War on Christmas”. “Its Merry christmas, not happy holidays!” They have even gotten snarky in the store with the clerk. Uggh.
Seriously, STFU, you represent a religion that has historically used war to oppress other people, a little open-mindedness from you is not that big of a deal.
Any wonder why I become a total scrooge this time of year.
which tees up my mini-rant quite nicely. Not everything related to winter is automatically Christmassy. There is nothing about “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” that refers to any sort of celebration or holiday, Christmas or otherwise. It merely says it’s cold. Somewhere along the line, everything relating to winter started getting labelled as relating to Christmas, even though Christmas is near the start of winter in the Northern Hemisphere and has nothing to do with winter in the Southern.
It can get more ridiculous - at least there’s a connection between winter and Christmas. I have some Christmas music CDs which include “My Favorite Things” and “The Bells of Saint Mary’s”. How did those ever get on a Christmas album?
Okay, try this: “Oh those ornaments? Tragic story. I was storing them in the toolshed in the back yard, and last summer some neighborhood kids got in there with some fireworks left over from the Fourth of July, and they burned the thing to the ground. Thank God none of them was hurt at all, but everything in the shed was totally incinerated. I was able to get a new lawn mower at the Goodwill, but nothing can ever replace those ornaments. Sigh.”
N.B. The above is just the cover story. In real life, you just throw them out.
Actually, I agree. Same could be said of “Sleigh Ride”, “Jingle Bells” or “Winter Wonderland” (Not to mention “Let it Snow”, thought I just did mention it. . .)
And you know, they don’t even stay on your nose and eyelashes - they melt from body heat. Course, you might get ice forming on your nose and eyelashes if you stay out long enough…
I can’t find the damned mini-rant thread, so here’s my rant du jour - we don’t need a blizzard every freakin’ Friday. Jim and I got home before the worst of the traffic today, but last Friday it took him five hours to get home (a 45 minute drive usually). The wind is just howling outside my window now, and the temperature is set to plummet. Welcome to December! :mad:
For the second time in a month, a critical issue has cropped up in my particular domain of expertise late on a Friday. And I go on vacation starting Wednesday. There goes another weekend.
I collect brooches and wear them whenever I get the chance. I can’t count the number of times I have been wearing a snowflake, snowman, or angel pin and been asked why I’m wearing a Christmas pin after Christmas.
Well, this is both a Christmas rant and a weather rant - we had to cancel out on our social group Christmas party due to the crappy roads because of the crappy weather. Heading out on roads with two feet of churned up snow and more snow coming down just isn’t something you do if you don’t have to. Bah. I was looking forward to this party. Jim’s work party is next Friday - if our string of Friday blizzards continues, I’ll be ranting about that next week. (And I have a nice, fashionable dress for a change. :mad: )
(And I have a nice, fashionable dress for a change. :mad: )