Let the holiday mini rants begin

Happy Belated Shut-Your-Cake-Hole-mas. Start celebrating it.

Not really. Many people have switched to LED holiday lights. Much more efficient. Maybe .05 watts/bulb as compared to .5 watts/mini-incandescent, or 5-6 watts for a large incandescent.. So lighting up for the holidays probably takes 1/10 - 1/100 less energy than in previous years. .

My sis-in-law allus asks for and allus gets a couple of jigsaw puzzles for chrimblepoo.

Makes it dead easy.

So I stroll in Toys r Us and lo and behold, there on the jigsaw rack it says “Buy one 1000 piece jigsaw get a second half price”

I pick 2 puzzles and amble towards checkout where the girl tries to charge me full price for them both. I point out the error of her ways.

She tells me that the sign really means buy one 1000 piece and get a 250 piece jigsaw free.

“Well it doesn’t say that m’dear”…I’m really calm at this point

“It should”

“It doesn’t”…I’m less calm

“Well it should”

“Well it bloody well doesn’t!!”…calm is forgotten

“Do you want these jigsaws or not?”

“No I sodding well don’t”
Ho-ho fucking ho!

My neighbors, my mini-rant! You do have a valid point.

However, knowing my neighbors, I seriously doubt that they have purchased all new holiday lights. They’re the same lights in the same configurations that I’ve seen for the past 20 years in this house. But I do suppose it’s possible that they were all hit with sudden impulses toward responsible energy use and spent money for new lights, despite most of them being unemployed.

To be fair, they probably expect you to, at the very least, bring some pie.
Seriously though, I hope your father is well soon.

Oh no you di’nt! That’s the second worst day of the year (the worst being, of course, the aptly named Black Friday). I work downtown near all the shopping stores, and believe me, the morons are out in force that day too!

Oh, wait, this year Dec. 26th is on a Saturday. Yippee! I don’t have to go downtown.

And I’ll be in Palm Springs anyway. So there, Christmas! As the fella said at the end of Independence Day, Up Yours!

Well, I just thought of a sobby Christmas story of my own, which seems to take the wind out of my own sails. In 2nd grade, I made a ceramic cooking spoon rest for my mother for Christmas, colored kind of a putrid red and green, and with my own finger-marked depressions spaced around the spoon-shaped depression in the middle. She kept it and it was the only spoon rest she used for the rest of her life. When she died, my father asked me if there was anything personal of hers that I wanted as a memento, and this was the only thing I wanted.

I miss my mother. Sorry for the hijack.
Roddy

I flew from Rome to Madrid on Iberia Airlines a couple of weeks ago. Apparently, Iberia plays music on its flights. Or, at least, during the first 45 minutes and the last 45 minutes. I think they had a Christmas mix with about 10 songs on it. 9 Christmas carols and Sarah McLaughlin’s “Angel.”

Yes, because an hour and a half of Christmas carols shared with 160 of my closest friends while packed into a high-speed sardine can isn’t my idea of Hell.

Let me rant with you all, in song.

Nah, just a happy by-product of Dopers upholding long-standing tradition.

My holiday rant is smaller this year, thanks to the invention of iPods. Thank you, iPod inventor. I will be able to shop in heavenly peace this year.

Did you have last Friday off? They started that on Thursday night, to coincide with their holiday kickoff party at Disneyland.

Now there’s a sig worthy line if ever I heard one. Bravo!

You know, I rant about detailed laws as much as the next person, but this is WHY we need laws. In at least some jurisdictions, if a store offers a free item with a purchase, it has to detail the minimum purchase AND what the free item consists of. Every “buy one get one free” offer I’ve ever seen has fine print saying that the free item will be the cheaper of the two items, for instance.

I think that you should have contacted the store manager, and if you didn’t get satisfaction, contact the regional manager. Yeah, it’s a little thing, but they probably get a lot of customers who don’t want those damned jigsaws if they’re not told, up front, that the free jigsaw was a 250 piecer. I’d be happy with picking out a couple of thousand piece puzzles, and then a couple of smaller puzzles for free, if I knew about it beforehand. If I expected to get two larger ones for the price of one, and then got into an argument with the clerk, I’d probably just drop both of them on the counter, and call the manager. Most people would probably just leave…and not set foot in ToysRUs for the rest of the year. Since TRU needs to make its nut for the year during the next six weeks, this store could lose a LOT of customers this way.

One of the radio stations I listen to in my car switches to an all-Xmas music format every year and is therefore DEAD to me until after the new year begins. This year they made the switch a full week BEFORE Thanksgiving.

There just isn’t enough decent Xmas music out there to sustain such a large time period, you douchebags. Did I mention that you’re dead to me for the rest of the year?

(the worst part is that this is the one station where I know what time the traffic reports air. DAMN IT!)

I saw an ad earlier this evening for Old Navy. They’re opening at 3:00 a.m. on Friday. Three-freakin’-a.m.
Really? What, 5:00 a.m. isn’t good enough for you?

Get the Fuck away from me. Also, shut the Fuck up.

You’ve not answered the question. Are you a passive-aggressive jerk IRL, too?

Carol Stream, Christmas Warrior.

Who is this Fuck person and why is he bothering you so much?

Ha ha. Well, actually, I’m going to attempt to make a Chocolate Amaretto Pie, but I don’t know how successful I’ll be.

My dad is doing better today, thanks. I hope that tomorrow is better still.