Let's bitch about stuff! (more mini rants)

The BBQ Pit
1

SAIJMUWINEIPBNKWITA (Stupid Acronym I Just Made Up Which I’ll Now Explain In Parentheses Because Nobody Knows What I’m Talking About) Why do you do it? It’s not quicker for anyone; quite the opposite, I would think. Stop that.

“And since this is the pit… <insert entirely random (usually lame) string of “naughty words” here>” It’s old. It’s been done before by people better than you, and even then it wasn’t smart, or funny, or clever, or shocking. Even this rant is old. Stop that, too.

fck, sht, sshle, etc. Why? That is a serious question, people. There has to be an explanation for this. Over here, you have people falling all over themselves to use Bad Words, but in any other forum, it’s asterisks for everyone! WTF, seriously? And yeah, they aren’t really swear words, but let’s add “g_d” and “n*gger” (even worse, “the ‘N’ word”) to that. If the words are so awful that you can’t even bring yourself to type them out, maybe you shouldn’t be using them at all.

WAGs in GQ. I rarely post in GQ, and there’s a reason for that. It’s not because I’m dumb; I know a little bit about a lot of stuff and I have a lot of guesses, but guess what? People who post in GQ generally want answers. I won’t ask you to stop though because I feel a very small satisfaction when someone comes along and smacks you down with cites that prove how wrong you are. Dumbass.

“Replace [word] with [different word, usually “black”], and you’ll understand how so clearly offensive you are.” Okay. I get it. You’re trying to prove a point. Whatever. Try again when you’ve had time to think things through, but for fuck’s sake, leave black people alone! I’ve said it over and over since I got here, and I’m not the only one who thinks this is just so, so dumb. Knock it off.

Last, but not least, since I know you so well, ironic responses to pit threads. I can see you now, itching to post about fcking shtstains and, oh, since this is the pit, and blahblahblah. Stop right there. You? Not clever. Don’t think for even one second that you are.

P.S. Hyphens. I hate you.

P.P.S. To my beloved Mister Gay: stop licking yourself so damn much! Ugh, so gross.

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IAHIWSQTEOPITFR. (I also hate it when someone quotes the entire OP in the first reply)

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Oh, and replace “you” with “one eyed french hookers” in your OP and see how offensive it is.

And since this is in the pit, Fk you, b*h.

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Internet, stop being so entertaining. I have things to do damnit!

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You say the sweetest things. :rolleyes:

:smiley:

I wonder if we have any one eyed (is that hyphenated? do you see what I mean about hyphens?) French hookers around here to offend?

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Seriously! I mean, WTF?

What does that mean?

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That’s her cat, I believe.

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Indeed she is my kitty. Her name comes from the book/movie Dreamcatcher, and we all know how bad that piece of shit was. Anyway, she’s constantly licking her paws and whatnot (maybe she has OCD?), and it makes the most disgusting sound on the planet. Sidenote to my bitch of a cat: The mice? You should kill them like you used to instead of bringing them upstairs and letting them go. Thanks bunches.

Somebody tell me: Why do I own the book AND the movie, if it’s so awful? Because I really don’t know.

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Okay! I don’t have any idea what this thread is about so far, but the title says let’s bitch about stuff so I’ve got one. I was just watching Gwen Stefani’s Rich Girl video and there’s a line in that song that’s driving me nuts. She says, “See, I’d have all the money in the world, if I was a wealthy girl.”

Well, excuse me, but bullshit! There have been untold millions of wealthy people in the course of this planet’s history and none of them ever came close to having all the money in the world!

And not only that, but she wants to make sure we understand by adding “See” at the beginning of the line, as if we might not get it otherwise.

I don’t know why, but shit like this drives me crazy!

Ahem…excuse me. You may now continue with whatever the hell it is you’ve been talking about here.

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“…if I was a wealthy girl…”

She’s not?

And for Ogs sake, why did you have to drag Fiddler on the Roof kicking and screaming into pop culture? Couldn’t you have left it alone?
WHY MUST EVERYTHING BE REMIXED AND OR SAMPLED!?!?!?!?!?

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“I fried up a black for dinner and ate it.”

Wow, they’re right!
Ok, my own rants o’ the moment.

Clients who sit on projects until the last minute. We’re doing an ad for the African division of a Japanese car maker. We’ve been working on this thing for months, trying to get everything just how the client representative wants it, and finally everything’s been approved by him. We found a photographer in South Africa to do the shoot and are just about to book a hotel when we get a call. After all this time, only now has the dumb sack of meat we’ve been talking with all these months bothered to show our work to his boss, who’s decided he doesn’t like any of it and wants everything re-done. At least it’s not as bad as another of our car clients (whose name rhymes with “rolling lump of flame-broiled dog shitsubishi”) who pulled this stunt on us twice in the same goddamn project.

Clients who manage by committee. When I had to write a product sales manual a while back, the client wanted me to come in to talk with people from different divisions connect with the product. Great, until I found that none of them had agreed on what they wanted in the manual, several of them didnt know what the product could do, and none of them could make a final decision. For the next two months I got a steady stream of phone calls from them, in which one would tell me to add a new paragraph to page 17, then someone else would call an hour later telling me to delete it (and then an hour later a third person telling me to put it back). I was the little kid shuttling messages back and forth in argument between mom and dad.

Ok, that was a little longer than I planned. But that’s what’s bugging me.

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Thank you! I’ve been having a near-apoplexy on my husband every time I hear this and he’s sick of hearing about it. But for fuck’s sake, LEAVE MY Fiddler ALONE! Fuck!

And Best Buy? You SUCK. You’re lucky I was so damn exhausted yesterday and went home to sleep, since one of your stupid workers said “Oh, no, Sims 2 University will be here today - if you want to come get it after 3, that’s fine!”, then showed up to “Oh, those are still in boxes and I can’t take them out.”.

I’m going to get one today - I better not have any problems getting one at lunch, because dammit, I am GOING to play this game tonight.

To my resume client - I DON"T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU WANT at this point! I’m embarrassed to have my name on a resume THAT long! I’m the one who does this professionally, let me write the fucking thing. I guarantee you will get interviews. Every single one of my other clients has.

E.

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The Sims 2 University comes out today? Holy sh*t!

What?

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Fuck me for being so forgetful. I had one of these thought out just last night, just in case one of these threads came along. Dammit!

Oh, yeah, remixes. I’ve only ever run into one I liked. The rest either were so close to the original it didn’t matter, or were absolute shit. Stop doing it, PLEASE!

To the wind which has been blowing for far too many hours–STOP IT!!! Not only have you been keeping be from getting any decent sleep, not only are you rattling the windows as we speak and driving me even closer to insanity, BUT I HAVE TO WALK TO SCHOOL LATER!!! This is gonna suck…

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Yeah, that’s what caught my eye, too. Too bad it’s dumping 8 inches of snow outside (at least).

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To my darling husband:

The left-hand kitchen sink has no garbage disposal. Food scraped off a plate into that sink will eventually have to be picked out by hand and transferred to the right-hand sink in order to go through the garbage disposal. It’s just as easy to sweep food off into the right-hand sink in the first place. Every pair of kitchen sinks we’ve ever had has had this arrangement. Why can’t you remember this simple fact?

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Let’s see; things bugging me at the moment:

  • being laid off from my really well-paying job. I want to go to work and earn lots of money so that we can pay off our huge debts.

  • applying for other jobs to fill in till I go back to work. I don’t want to do data entry for 12 bucks an hour, but I will. Soon.

  • my boss - get more work so that I don’t have to be laid off, will ya?

  • my cat wanting to play all day since I here. I have other stuff to do, my little poopyhead. Clawing at my legs is not going to get me to play with you. It might get you shut out of my room, though.

  • Did I mention our huge debts? These stinking things hanging over our heads like a bleeding guillotine that could come crashing down at any time if we both don’t keep working like mad sonsofbitches.

  • my husband telling me that he hates his job and could fall into deep depression from it. I don’t know what to do with that. Yes, he needs to be happy at work, but I am laid off at the minute, and we need the money, and I’m not the only one that has to work at crappy jobs to pay back our debts around here. Bah. This is a whole thread on its own.

I think that’s it for now. Oh yeah, my k-os cd doesn’t want to play in my computer cd player. Stupid too much formatting on modern cds.

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Heh - lightweights. It’s been snowing for two days here and I’m still at work. Of course, this is Ohio and our damn snowplows tend to get to the snow before it hits the ground.

Picked up University at lunch today. Heading home to play it in 3 hours. 5 PM couldn’t come soon enough for me. Mr. e is stuck working late tonight (and hey, fuck you, mr. e’s boss for the short notice!), so I’ll need something to do.

E.

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I saw a silly movie once about a boy who wished for all the money in the world. Somehow it all fit in his garage, so I guess it came with a free bag of holding. It didn’t take very long for all the world’s leaders to show up at his house and demand their money back, but when he tried to give any away it magically appeared back in the garage.

Oh yeah, I hate when people come in threads and post random shit that’s only tangentially related to the OP.

20

You were in such a damn hurry to pull out in front of me, why can’t you at least go the freaking speed limit? I don’t expect you to speed, but if you were in THAT big of a hurry that you HAD to pull out in front of me, dammit, don’t slow me down!

If you have to shop with your wife/husband at the grocery store, remember that you aren’t the only damn ones there. When one of you stands on one side of the aisle with the cart and the other of you stands on the other side looking at stuff, you ARE IN THE WAY. Move the fuck over. Yes, you have a right to be there, but be courteous and don’t block the whole damn aisle. And if I say excuse me in aisle 10 because are doing this, cop a fucking clue in aisle 12. That aisle is no damn wider than 10 was you freaking moron.