Let's create the Ultimate '___-pocolyse Survival Guide"

So I was browsing Gizmodo today, and saw this article. It got me thinking.

“Sure it’d be great for mowing down zombies, but where do you find parts for that thing once the zombiepocolyse starts?”

Now like a lot of dopers, I’ve got a semi plan in the back of my head in case of the impending x-pocolypse, but it’s sort of half assed and probably missing a huge amount of stuff. So, I thought to myself why don’t we dopers pool our resources and create the ultimate survival guide?

So if you had to pick a vehicle to drive around during the x-pocolypse, what would it be? Something fairly sturdy to hold up to the occasional rampaging hordes, but it’d have to be simple enough that you could do maintenance on it yourself. Something with fairly simple parts that you could get enough of to keep it running.

What about gas? I think I read here someplace that gas evaporates eventually, so how long will it last? Any easily sustainable replacements?

What kind of home base should I be shopping around for? I’m not independently wealthy, so building my own redoubt is out of the question, so what types of buildings should I be eyeing to take over and fortify? I was thinking the local movie theater, nice solid metal doors, made out of cinderblock, so fairly tough, plenty of room inside to store my horde of supplies, and an entrance that can be easily blocked.

Power? Electricity makes a lot of things possible, so what is the best way to generate power? Solar panel or wind turbines seem a good way to get power once the grid goes down, but how long would they last without expense maintenance that can’t be performed because the repair guy is out looking for brains? How difficult would it be to build a steam power plant? Wouldn’t have to be huge, just enough to supply one building or small group of buildings. Power gives the ability to keep a lot of material in computer form. So compiling a reference library is a bit easier and more portable than stacks of books. So the need to generate enough power to keep a laptop charged.

What about food? How long does most canned food really last? And are some kinds better than others? What about seeds, how long will they keep if I make a little stockpile of stuff to grow? How about hunting or butchering animals? I mean, I know the general idea, but what is a good resource for showing how to really dress out game?

What about weapons? Sure I can hit the local Wal-Mart for shotguns, but what about more powerful stuff? I heard a rumor that most American legion posts have an armory in them, is that the best place to hit to find ammo to fight off the zombie hordes? I don’t want to compile a list of exact targets or anything, but what are the types of places to look for to stock up? Places that every other Tom, Dick and Harry aren’t going to think of?

What else? What other tools, information, locations, supplies, and such like would a person need to survive an x-pocolypse? For this particular thread, let’s concentrate on those type of x-pocolyses that are short term in nature, say 5 years max…so the zombies will eventually die out, or some other nation will move in to provide stability once the US collapses…if this goes well, maybe we can do another one for long-term survival.

This is probably the best option for a vehicle. You can drive pretty much anywhere and have a large selection of fuels that will work. Unless you need to transport a family you shouldn’t be traveling with more then you can carry on you back anyhow since eventually it will break or you won’t be able to get fuel.

I just wanted to chime in here to say that this is one of the funniest things I’ve ever heard.

Most American Legion posts have a bingo parlor inside and a WW2-era cannon on the outside that would blow up if you tried to put a shell in it, much less fire it.

Some general principles for surviving a mid-to long term loss of civilization:

  1. People are social animals; your chances of surviving go up exponentially with the number of people who are on your side (and vice-versa). Except in circumstances in which large groups of people either can’t obtain sufficient resources or present too big a target, lone wolf survivalists will fair poorly.

  2. Being fit enough to walk long distances and perform manual labor on an extended basis will be almost indispensible. A weight control and exercise regimen is highly recommended.

  3. Bear in mind that 90% or more of “wilderness survival” is geared towards short-term forays away from civilization. Surviving for months or years without support is an entirely different proposition from going camping for a fortnight.

  4. The chaotic period of collapse where some are trying with increasing desperation to preserve the structures of civilization while others are actively working to tear them down will in many ways be worse than the aftermath. In a sense, once civilization has finished collapsing completely many problems will be ended, leaving you with greater freedom to act.

  5. The biggest long-term challenge will be food. Resources will vary tremendously depending on the scenerio, but in general food will become scarcer as time goes by until people can begin farming again.

Well, I know for a fact the one in Lodi Ohio had a nice steel vault door in the back with an alarm system. So I suppose they could be keeping the Bingo balls in there to keep them safe from tampering, but I suspect something else.
Hmmm…not a lot of takers to compile the list…fine..I’ll research and make my own zombiepocolypse guide and won’t share. Don’t come crying to me when you’re being overtaken by brain seeking hordes of the undead. :smiley:

Hmmm… some poking around in the American Legion site, and a brief email with my father-in-law would indicate that some Legion halls may have storage on site for Ceremonial M1’s.

So, not QUITE an armory, but there may be M1’s on site that could be looted.

Here are a few classics from the Zombie Squad;

bugging out to a big-box store?
accountability in the PAW
how to be the “gray man”

The whole zombihunters website is a treasure trove of preparedness hints, tips, and tricks, and is just as addictive as the SDMB

The Zombie Survival Guide is a good template for this X-pocalypse Guide.