lets get physical

what can i do about my girlfriend who doesnt really cuddle with my when were watching a movie or whatever. ill have my arm around her and stuff but it doesnt seem like shes too into it… maybe i should invest in a better deoderant (sp…). but besides that, what on earth should i do??

Well, it sort of depends.

I like to cuddle, but sometimes I get too hot.
I have had SO’s that wern’t really into the whole cuddle scene and prefered to show affection in other ways.
I have had SO’s that were cuddle MONSTERS and getting away from the to breath for a moment or two was a feat.
My current SO is sort of in the middle - cuddley, but not smothering.

So - have you inquired about your girlfriends cuddling preference?

Can we make that them and breathe, SVP.

Merci :rolleyes:

There are perhaps few things your could do. The first thing you could do is tell her of your desire for increased cuddling during films (this is what I would do with my girl). Another is for you to take up the available room leaving her no choice but to be close to you. (I’m assuming a couch and a movie on TV here.) A third is for you to find other times to cuddle with her that where she might not be so centered on what she’s watching.

One thing for sure is to just ask her if it bothers her or not but be ready for whatever answer she gives. Don’t ask her in the middle of the show while she’s fighting you off. Ask her some time when you’re across a table or something so she doesn’t feel you are just re-acting to her. Don’t forget that if you push the issue, you could both become acutely sensitive to the whole topic. Once you’re sensitive to it, you only want to do it less.

If this whole movie watching thing is at a theater, or when in public, maybe she is just uncomfortable with PDA. Respect the boundries and they will probably come down by themselves.

Aren’t you the same lady-killer that posted this OP:?

<<<id like the low-down on kissing. everything about doing it, books, websites, magazines. hell, anything. ive done it before but it always feels like i should be doing something different. so, from a peck on the lips to french kissing, what do i do??>>>

In this thread:?

My humble suggestion: Finish the 6th grade and worry about the nookie later. Oh, that key that says SHIFT will make the first letters of your sentences kissably smooth!

First off, make sure you are clear on the distinction between “cuddling” and “groping”.

If your “girlfriend” doesn’t cuddle back, then perhaps she sees it as more the latter than the former.

As far as I know, there is no solution to this. Intimacy defies rationality. Either you want it or you don’t.

Is this an occasional problem, or a regular one?

The trillion-dollar question is, cuddling with your what?

Nice catch! I misread it as a typo for “me” rather than an omission. So, which is it, CrAcKmOo?

Yea, it was supposed to be me. I thought I already posted the correction but I guess it never showed up, and for Stockton, its always good to see these a-hole dopers that have nothing better to do with their time than to make fun of posters with honest questions. Sorry i offended you in some way with my question but if you’re not going to post advice, then don’t post at all.

Don’t spit into the wind.

Oh, you mean relevant advice… sorry. “My bad,” as my sister says.

What’s “and stuff”? What if she just isn’t into that sort of thing? As others have pointed out, different people are different. Is this a relationship busting problem?

Thanks for using caps and apostrophes and such in your most recent reply; since this is a text-only message board, people tend to assume bad things about people who don’t have nice text.