I think you’d need to consider how they treat people they consider inferior to gauge wether someone is a jerk. Sometimes people have a bad day, or the old adage we only hurt the ones we love, etc.
Are these friends exactly like them in dress and social background?
I encountered an asshole today! We’re having a small local science fiction convention, named Conjecture.
I don’t want to give any more information, as it might make the individual identifiable, and that would be wrong. But…wow, what a total, titanic, reeking, noisome, spitting (literally!) offensive jackass!
And…I was introduced to him by a mutual friend, whom I like, know, trust, and admire.
So, in this one case, at least, I have a very good friend…just about the best…who is also friends with this grotesque reeking turd!
(I made every possible effort to be polite, myself, but I can’t help wondering if the guy feels the same way about me!)
Gawd, we are the weirdest species ever!
Very few people are not assholes in some way or another. My test is to watch how people treat waiters and waitresses.
I agree, and have long held that view.
I have always hoped a book will be written by someone who has spent decades working in the make-up room for a TV talk show that features a never-ending lineup of celebrity guests. Tell us which celebrities are assholes and which are not, from somebody who really knows.
Re: the waiters, I have always told girls that before they put that ring on their finger, secretly follow their intended around and see how he treats wait staff, when he is not just play acting to win your respect. Or eavesdrop on him when he phones a call center, and see how he talks to the operators who are standing by, putting up with a daily flood of assholes…
This thread hits home, since I’m sure many Dopers have concluded I’m an asshole! 
I suffered a severe inferiority complex until my late 20’s; by my late 30’s I had a superiority complex! I’ll guess the two are sides of the same coin.
For most of my life, I was asocial; my acquaintances were intellectuals (e.g. fellow bridge players or circuit designers) and people with mental disorders. Conversations were … “off-topic”. Retiring to Thailand has stimulated my social awareness. My experience with the range of Westerners’ personalities owes more to talking with fellow foreigners here, than decades in U.S.A.!
Believe it or not, that’s me! I am liked by many, but it is hard to get past my obnoxious shell. My obnoxity doubtless hindered my career; since it was largely “involuntary” I sometimes mused that obnoxious people should be included with blacks and women etc. under Affirmative Action programs! 
This reminds me strongly of a few Westerners I’ve met in Thailand.
Easy example. SDMB
Go write your book on that 1% of 1% of 1%. I’m sure it will sell, but don’t ever tell any of the rest of us in the real world that it has ANYTHING to do with us. Ever.
YOU’RE one of those Miserable SOBs who think Stalking is Acceptable!? You ENCOURAGE it???
There were 15 immediate responses to that which just aren’t allowable by board rules, mister.
Be. Thankful. :mad:
You’ve got to be kidding. You don’t actually imagine that was a concrete, real-life suggestion, do you? It was figurative. It was an “If I were a fly on the wall” metaphor, and not any actual recommendation to listen in on people’s phone conversations.
You took it far too literally. Lighten up and study this thing called a “figure of speech.”
ETA: Unless I was whooshed by someone pretending to be whooshed!
"It’s time for another round of ASSHOLE, JACKOFF, SCUMBAG!
with nod to George Carlin