Lines to spoil a movie

Cafe Society
41

The Shining
We don’t have any guests and the weather’s getting bad. What do you say we go into town for a couple of days?

Poltergeist
Turn off the TV and go to bed!

Bridge Over the River Kwai
I’ve just inspected the bridge and I am shocked to find such disorganization, shirking and outright sabotage in its construction. This bridge will collapse the first time a train tries to cross it. Keep up the good work.

Citizen Kane (again!)
Charles, this is Mr. Thatcher. He’s going to take you, me and your father on a wonderful trip back east. Be sure to pack your sled. We’ll be traveling until spring!

West Side Story
Look out! He has a knife!

To Kill a Mockingbird
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, you all know me. You know I didn’t want to be assigned this man’s case. In fact, I’ve put very little time or effort into his defense. Despite this, the prosecution’s case is so weak that it’s fallen apart at every stage of the trial. If you convict this man, Superior Court will not only overturn the verdict, but also most likely ban the sheriff, the prosecutor and the judge from ever working in the field of law again. Or you can accept the obvious, vote not guilty, and we can all be home in time for supper.

High Noon
Yes, we were supposed to get married next month, but Amy just found out she’s pregnant, and the store is waiting for me, so we figured, why wait. Take good care of the town, Harvey.

Karate Kid
Miyagi old man. Miyagi no teach anymore. Try YMCA.

Risky Business
You’re a high school kid! I don’t do jailbait. Call me in a couple of years.

Home Alone
The plane is boarding. Wait, where’s Kevin?

42

Aliens
Ripley: “That’s an interesting offer, Burke. Could you put it in writing?”

Madame Bovary
Emma: “I appreciate your proposal, Charles, dear, but I don’t think we’re sufficiently compatible to make a happy couple.”

Miracle/Miracle on Ice
USOC official to Herb Brooks: “The Soviets and the whole Eastern Bloc are going to boycott the Winter Games, after all. Do you think your team can beat Canada?”

Ben-Hur
Roman Centurion: “Sir, he’s telling the truth! I happened to glance up and saw the tiles coming loose as soon as he leaned against them a bit. Maybe that’s negligence that should be punishable by a fine or something, but I wouldn’t railroad him and his whole family over it.”

Animal House
Greg Malamard: “Well, what do we have here? Why are all you fine fellows sulking in the corner, when you could be mixing? Here, let me introduce you to the Editor-in-Chief of The Daily Faberian,…”.

Double Jeopardy
The railroaded wife: “Now that I’ve tracked down the sonofabitch, I’ll sue him for custody and every penny he’s got.”

Elvira Madigan
Girl: “Sir, I couldn’t possibly elope with you. My life is with the circus and yours is with the army.”

Charlie Wilson’s War
U.S. Rep. Wilson: “Joanne, I may be a womanizer who dates Playboy models and an alcoholic who does blow with strippers, but there’s one law I’m not willing to break and that’s the Logan Act.”

Layer Cake
Daniel Craig’s dealer character: “I’m not a hood; I’m a businessman. I don’t take unnecessary risks and I’m not ‘flash’. And I’m not going to make the same mistake every two-bit crook and dealer makes, which is to try for one final, big score before getting out. I’m getting out now, when everything’s hunky-dory and I’m fairly flush.”

43

“Hey Marcus, I have a better idea: let Hitler keep the Ark of the Covenant. Then, when he opens it, the spirits will consume the Nazi high command and we’ll win the war. Problem solved!”

44

Reminds me of a quote from Alamo:
James Bowie: I don’t deserve mercy. I do deserve a drink. You got anything stronger than water?
[smiling]
William Travis: I don’t drink, Jim, you know that. I gamble, go to whores, run off on wives… but drinking, I draw the line.

And here’s an on-topic one for Romeo And Juliet

Rosaline: “Why, Romeo, I thought you’d never ask! Why wouldn’t I want to go out with you?”

45

Gone With the Wind.

Ashley: Scarlet, if you truly feel that way about me, I’ll dump Melanie and we can elope.
Surely someone has already done Star Wars: :slight_smile:

Princess Leia, I am your Father.

Any Star Trek episode:

Kirk: Mr. Spock, set your phaser to kill and shoot that thing.

46

Raiders of the Lost Ark
The Ark of the Covenant? Sorry, my specialty is Pre-Columbian Mesoamerica. Weren’t you watching the intro?

Seriously, Indy hunts down relics in the Amazon, the Middle East, Egypt, India, China and Europe. By the time they reach full professor, aren’t most archaeologists specialized down to a single village and decade?

47

Stargate:

“What the PISS, Airman? Did you really just DROP the Artifact? Look at the crack in this thing! Fuck it, get some superglue and put it back together, hopefully the brass will never notice. I’ll deal with you later.”

48

Flags of Our Fathers
“Well, it’s official. Orders from Washington…Iwo Jima is to be subjected to a two week chemical bombardment campaign delivered aerially by a special composite group under the direction of General LeMay; preceeding any landing of ground troops in Operation Detachment.”
“Cripes…the piano-playin’ Democrat really had it in 'im. The sand’ll smell like mustard by the time he’s done.”
“‘Howlin’ Mad’ ain’t gonna like it. This was going to be a cakewalk.”

49

Rain Man:

“Rosebushes, and a car? Sweet!”

Planes, Trains and Automobiles:

“You know what? You’re right, I won’t make the six.”

50

Any slasher flick:

“Don’t go in the basement/woods/abandoned house, there’s a crazy guy with an axe/buzzsaw/big ass knife who’s killing people!”

51

“Spending the weekend in an old cabin in the woods? Sounds great, but some of us actually want to graduate college. Gotta prep for finals.”

And another one for slasher flicks:

“You know what? We should do the responsible thing here, instead of whatever dumbfuck plan we first think of while drunk and/or panicked.”

52

Norman Bates(Psycho): “Yes Mother, I’m gay and I’m leaving home.”

53

Gaslight:
The jewels are sewn into the gowns. Go get 'em and leave the poor girl alone.

54

Rocky Horror: Brad, I’m glad I bought my brand new cell phone.

Little Shop of Horrors: Shit, I fogot to water my plant. It’s dead.

Les Miserables: All he stole was a loaf of bread to feed his starving family. Let him go, and here’s some pastries for dessert.

55

Marie Antoinette

“Let them eat cake! No, I mean it, give them all lots and lots of cakes every day! Cheesecake, chocolate cake, whatever they want!”

“Hooray for Marie Antoinette!!! We love her!”

56

Wicked Witch: I’ll get you my pretty. And your little dog too.
Dorothy pulls 357 Magnum from picnic basket: Go ahead. Make my day.

57

Dracula:

Johnathan Harker: “I’m very sorry, Count, but the local community board have sought an injunction against you purchasing the abbey. It’s the whole ‘transporting dead bodies across Europe’ thing; you know how squeamish folks get about the plague thing.”

Frankenstein:

Igor: "You are one sick, sick, sick bastard, you know that Frank? Just sewing a bunch of corpse pieces together isn’t going to graft them together into a cohesive body. And even if you could do that, it still doesn’t matter. All a bolt of lightning it going to do is incinerate that hulk of flesh. And for God’s sake, it STINKS! You’re on your own, looney. I quit.

58

First Blood and all subsequent Rambo movies,

Sheriff (Brian Dennehy) - Keep walking!
John Rambo - OK

59

With regard to *this *rather-forgettable SUPREMELY EPIC FILM:

After creating land animals early in the sixth day,

"Oh, I darn it, I just realized that if I create beings in my own image with free will they probably will all just rebel and become bitter and resentful, and I will feel the same way. Better just to leave creation at this stage.

“Besides, I just realized how obscene male and female bodies would look. Future artists will have to interpose all sorts of objects to block the view of the really nasty parts. And the film they make on this will just barely make it past the Legion of Decency!”

  • “Jack”
60

Ivanhoe.

Leopold of Austria: I can’t imagine what came over me, Richard, holding a fellow Christian from the Crusades for ransom. I’ve got to cut down on the drinking, I guess. Have a safe trip home; see you at the next Crusade.