Being supportive doesn’t mean that we encourage the other person not to take responsibility for their problems or that we don’t make reasonable suggestions or talk about what worked for us. It means not making assumptions about the other person at all.
When I get to the point where I believe that someone is making excuses, I don’t automatically blame that person or even voice that opinion because I know from experience that sitting on one’s ass and doing nothing about a problem can be a symptom of depression.
It’s easy to feel justified in telling a seemingly lazy depressed son-of-a-bitch to get off his ass and do something. We wouldn’t dream of telling that to a person in a catatonic state.
I’m just not in a good position to judge (even with people I know and especially with myself) what is laziness and lack of discipline and what is depression and medication.
(Sorry, Teach, don’t mean to lecture.)
CanvasShoes, you always make sense to me. I think we are kindred spirits. Even when we disagree, your perspective is always helpful when I’m thinking things through.