Loopy Limericks

At the library I picked up a book,
And something old fell out when I shook.

At the library I picked up a book,
And something old fell out when I shook.
An envelope fill of porn pics.

At the library I picked up a book,
And something old fell out when I shook.
An envelope fill of porn pics.
Showing clever gymnastic tricks

At the library I picked up a book,
And something old fell out when I shook.
An envelope fill of porn pics.
Showing clever gymnastic tricks,
Lo and behold, there was our old family cook!

A lady sat next to me in a bar

A lady sat next to me in a bar,
And said “What an interesting scar!”

A lady sat next to me in a bar,
And said “What an interesting scar!”
I got it from a clown.

A lady sat next to me in a bar,
And said “What an interesting scar!”
I got it from a clown.
With a painted-on frown

A lady sat next to me in a bar,
And said “What an interesting scar!”
I got it from a clown.
With a painted-on frown
And his eye had one big black star

At a performance of Avenue Q

At a performance of Avenue Q
I was watching a puppet or two

At a performance of Avenue Q
I was watching a puppet or two
When a couple of teens

At a performance of Avenue Q,
I was watching a puppet or two.
When a couple of teens
Tore off my jeans,

At a performance of Avenue Q,
I was watching a puppet or two.
When a couple of teens
Tore off my jeans,
And began to admire the view.

There was a young man from New York

There was a young man from New York
Who ate his French fries with a fork.

There was a young man from New York
Who ate his French fries with a fork.
All went just fine,

There was a young man from New York
Who ate his French fries with a fork.
All went just fine,
'twas a clean way to dine

There was a young man from New York
Who ate his French fries with a fork.
All went just fine,
'twas a clean way to dine,
'til he tried to drink soup with a spork.


The head of the Illuminati

The head of the Illuminati
Had a peep hole installed in the potty

The head of the Illuminati
Had a peep hole installed in the potty
And this all-seeing eye,

The head of the Illuminati
Had a peep hole installed in the potty
And this all-seeing eye,
Was positioned to spy