Loopy Limericks

Thread Games
2928

I did not give the waiter a tip.
His thumb’s in my artichoke dip.
But more horrible than that
Was the place that he shat

2929

I did not give the waiter a tip.
His thumb’s in my artichoke dip.
But more horrible than that
Was the place that he shat
Left us void of any fellowship.

Paul played third base in Oakland

2930

Paul played third base in Oakland
And he also played bass in a band

2931

Paul played third base in Oakland
And he also played bass in a band
When he sang playing ball

2932

Paul played third base in Oakland
And he also played bass in a band
When he sang playing ball
He would let the ball fall

2933

Paul played third base in Oakland
And he also played bass in a band
When he sang playing ball
He would let the ball fall
And tell his teammates to go pound sand.
Porky Pig, Elmer, and Bugs

2934

Porky Pig, Elmer, and Bugs
Had quite a game of tugs.

2935

Porky Pig, Elmer, and Bugs
Had quite a game of tugs.
Now they’ve all missing legs.

2936

Porky Pig, Elmer, and Bugs
Had quite a game of tugs.
Now they’ve all missing legs.
(Which are tasty with eggs)

2937

Porky Pig, Elmer, and Bugs
Had quite a game of tugs.
Now they’ve all missing legs.
(Which are tasty with eggs)
Happy as psychedelic drugs.

Alice Lovely had a ranch.

2938

Alice Lovely had a ranch,
Along with her poodle named Blanche.

2939

Alice Lovely had a ranch,
Along with her poodle named Blanche.
Men would come night and day

2940

Alice Lovely had a ranch,
Along with her poodle named Blanche.
Men would come night and day
But not for very long they’d stay

2941

Alice Lovely had a ranch,
Along with her poodle named Blanche.
Men would come night and day
But not for very long they’d stay
At her Palace of Horizontal Dance

“You are under arrest” the cop said

2942

“You are under arrest” the cop said
“For committing a crime in your bed”

2943

“You are under arrest” the cop said
“For committing a crime in your bed”
“Take heed, you young louse.”

2944

“You are under arrest” the cop said
“For committing a crime in your bed”
“Take heed, you young louse.”
“And you had better not grouse.”

2945

“You are under arrest” the cop said
“For committing a crime in your bed”
“Take heed, you young louse.”
“And you had better not grouse.”
“Watch what happens after you give head.”

John Ignatius had the kindest heart

2946

John Ignatius had the kindest heart.
He excelled at making abstract art

2947

John Ignatius had the kindest heart.
He excelled at making abstract art.
When some asked “What is it?”