When dinosaurs wandered this planet
Their dildos were made out of granite
And often several feet long
And sometimes resembled a bong
I’m not sure how the dinos could stand it.
Fireworks made my dogs shake
Fireworks made my dogs shake
Much too late they kept us awake
Fireworks made my dogs shake
Much too late they kept us awake
There were boisterous yahoos
Fireworks made my dogs shake
Much too late they kept us awake
There were boisterous yahoos
Drinking cheap booze
Fireworks made my dogs shake
Much too late they kept us awake
There were boisterous yahoos
Drinking cheap booze
It’s enough to give me a headache.
Barbeque on the Fourth was quite tasty
Barbeque on the Fourth was quite tasty
But the grease leaves my skin looking pasty
Barbeque on the Fourth was quite tasty
But the grease leaves my skin looking pasty
Then the dog came along
Barbeque on the Fourth was quite tasty
But the grease leaves my skin looking pasty
Then the dog came along
Wearing heels and a sarong
Barbeque on the Fourth was quite tasty
But the grease leaves my skin looking pasty
Then the dog came along
Wearing heels and a sarong
And goddammit, that mincing mutt chased me.
When coupons fill up my mailbox
When coupons fill up my mailbox
(That’s two hundred and fifty, approx.)
When coupons fill up my mailbox
(That’s two hundred and fifty, approx.)
It’s time to go shopping
When coupons fill up my mailbox
(That’s two hundred and fifty, approx.)
It’s time to go shopping
And store to store hopping
When coupons fill up my mailbox
(That’s two hundred and fifty, approx.)
It’s time to go shopping
And store to store hopping
Redeeming the one for lox
It was pointed out I forgot to start a new one:
I fear I’m becoming forgetful
I fear I’m becoming forgetful
Of brainfarts, I’ve had a net full
I fear I’m becoming forgetful
Of brainfarts, I’ve had a net full
I can’t find my glasses
I fear I’m becoming forgetful
Of brainfarts, I’ve had a net full
I can’t find my glasses
My thoughts move like molasses
I fear I’m becoming forgetful
Of brainfarts, I’ve had a net full
I can’t find my glasses
My thoughts move like molasses
Still a pilot though - incredible!
If you happen to find my cocaine
If you happen to find my cocaine,
Just start up a whisperin’ campaign.
If you happen to find my cocaine,
Just start up a whisperin’ campaign.
That it wasn’t my coke