Loopy Limericks

Thread Games
5009

I will certainly blame everything on you.
Because you are the one I’m determined to screw
So if I get chlamydia
They’ll probably get rid of ya
Even though it wouldn’t be true.

The nicest thing, about cats,

5010

The nicest thing, about cats,
They’ll treat you like door mats

5011

The nicest thing, about cats,
They’ll treat you like door mats
And on Wet Food Wednesday

5012

The nicest thing, about cats,
They’ll treat you like door mats
And on Wet Food Wednesday
They’ll pig out like a stray

5013

The nicest thing, about cats,
They’ll treat you like door mats
And on Wet Food Wednesday
They’ll pig out like a stray
Then zoom out like furred acrobats.

My database no longer works well

5014

My database no longer works well
Frankly, it’s all gone to hell

5015

My database no longer works well.
Frankly, it’s all gone to hell.
Now the contractor’s here

5016

My database no longer works well.
Frankly, it’s all gone to hell.
Now the contractor’s here
To confirm my worst fear:

5017

My database no longer works well.
Frankly, it’s all gone to hell.
Now the contractor’s here
To confirm my worst fear
And to sound the last knell for my Dell.

Today’s films are nothing but sequels

-“BB”-

5018

Today’s films are nothing but sequels
You can blame their producers’ weak wills

5019

Today’s films are nothing but sequels
You can blame their producers’ weak wills
But they make so much dough

5020

Today’s films are nothing but sequels
You can blame their producers’ weak wills
But they make so much dough
That studios can’t say no

5021

Today’s films are nothing but sequels.
You can blame their producers’ weak wills.
But they make so much dough
That studios can’t say no.
So they say in Beverly Hills.

A young alien from Cassiopeia

5022

A young alien from Cassiopeia
Came down with explosive diarrhea

5023

A young alien from Cassiopeia
Came down with explosive diarrhea
His ship filled with stool

5024

A young alien from Cassiopeia
Came down with explosive diarrhea
His ship filled with stool
Then he dumped it, like a fool

5025

A young alien from Cassiopeia
Came down with explosive diarrhea
His ship filled with stool
Then he dumped it, like a fool
And to the people of Earth, he said “See ya!”

The quest for a Speaker goes on

5026

The quest for a Speaker goes on
No one worthy wants the baton

5027

The quest for a Speaker goes on.
No one worthy wants the baton.
It’s almost a game

5028

The quest for a Speaker goes on.
No one worthy wants the baton.
It’s almost a game
And it’s getting kinda lame