Loopy Limericks

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7370

My mother didn’t give me affection
In my life, joy evaded detection.
And Daddy didn’t care
he’d pour one more beer

7371

My mother didn’t give me affection
In my life, joy evaded detection.
And Daddy didn’t care
he’d pour one more beer
But I found pleasure in my erection

I went to the movies last night

7372

I went to the movies last night
I left feeling sad and uptight

7373

I went to the movies last night
I left feeling sad and uptight
The film was by von Trier

7374

I went to the movies last night
I left feeling sad and uptight
The film was by von Trier
And prominently starred Cher

[Since non-English pronounciations have become an issue here lately, I went with “tree-AIR” for the name in line 3…]

7375

I went to the movies last night
I left feeling sad and uptight
The film was by von Trier
And prominently starred Cher
As a wombat - which doesn’t seem right!

Damn it! I’ve lost my car keys

7376

Damn it! I’ve lost my car keys
I’m searching down on my knees

7377

Damn it! I’ve lost my car keys
I’m searching down on my knees
They’re not under my bed

7378

Damn it! I’ve lost my car keys
I’m searching down on my knees
They’re not under my bed
but what I did find instead

7379

Damn it! I’ve lost my car keys
I’m searching down on my knees
They’re not under my bed
But what I did find instead
Was my 5 month old cheddar cheese

There is absolutely no space or time

7380

There is absolutely no space or time
In which dating a clown is a crime

7381

There is absolutely no space or time
In which dating a clown is a crime
And dating Flying Wallendas

7382

There is absolutely no space or time
In which dating a clown is a crime
And dating Flying Wallendas
Is completely stupendous

7383

There is absolutely no space or time
In which dating a clown is a crime
And dating Flying Wallendas
Is completely stupendous
and the law is quite silent on mime

Said Sulu to Captain Kirk

7384

Said Sulu to Captain Kirk
“I’m getting so bored with my work”

7385

Said Sulu to Captain Kirk
“I’m getting so bored with my work”
Manning the helm’s a snooze

7386

Said Sulu to Captain Kirk
“I’m getting so bored with my work”
Manning the helm’s a snooze
And off-duty I guzzle booze

7387

Said Sulu to Captain Kirk
“I’m getting so bored with my work”
Manning the helm’s a snooze
And off-duty I guzzle booze
Naked Spock? Not that much of a perq!

John and Paul, a great contrast of styles

7388

John and Paul, a great contrast of styles
John’s clothes were hung neatly, Paul’s were in piles

7389

John and Paul, a great contrast of styles
John’s clothes were hung neatly, Paul’s were in piles
George wore hand-me-downs