Loopy Limericks

For Boxing Day, I’m unprepared
I haven’t got a box to spare
My crackers won’t crack
And I’ve put out my back

For Boxing Day, I’m unprepared
I haven’t got a box to spare
My crackers won’t crack
And I’ve put out my back
Now my credit card is impaired


I have readied my New Year’s Resolution:

I have readied my New Year’s Resolution:
I shall defend the US constitution

I have readied my New Year’s Resolution:
I shall defend the US constitution
I’ll fight for our rights

I have readied my New Year’s Resolution:
I shall defend the US constitution
I’ll fight for our rights
In red and blue tights

I have readied my New Year’s Resolution:
I shall defend the US constitution
I’ll fight for our rights
In red and blue tights
And call for Trump’s quick prosecution

[Not part of game]
I mentioned this thread at a family dinner, and we extremely quickly came up with a limerick with five people each contributing a line. I thought it was pretty good:

A nervous young airman in Guam
Worried he’d come to great harm
He transferred to Truk
And enjoyed a good fuck
But it cost him a leg and an arm!
[/NPOG]

I nearly tripped over the cat

I nearly tripped over the cat
As he furiously chased a rat

I nearly tripped over the cat
As he furiously chased a rat
I’m clearly not graceful

I nearly tripped over the cat
As he furiously chased a rat
I’m clearly not graceful
and I sure got a face full

I nearly tripped over the cat
As he furiously chased a rat
I’m clearly not graceful
and I sure got a face full
To the floor I nearly went splat

Leave your number and name at the tone

Leave your number and name at the tone
I’ll call back when I’m drunk and alone

Leave your number and name at the tone
I’ll call back when I’m drunk and alone
But right now I’m boning your wife

Leave your number and name at the tone
I’ll call back when I’m drunk and alone
But right now I’m boning your wife
Pretending to be Barney Fife

Leave your number and name at the tone
I’ll call back when I’m drunk and alone
But right now I’m boning your wife
Pretending to be Barney Fife
I promise I’ll call when I’m done!

STRANGER THINGS’ big finale was meh

Jeez, did I kill this thread? Let me try again:

In its last episode, STRANGER THINGS

In its last episode, STRANGER THINGS
(Which I watched while eating chicken wings)

In its last episode, STRANGER THINGS
(Which I watched while eating chicken wings),
Offered up a finale

In its last episode, STRANGER THINGS
(Which I watched while eating chicken wings),
Offered up a finale
According to Sally

In its last episode, STRANGER THINGS
(Which I watched while eating chicken wings),
Offered up a finale
According to Sally
which left one too many loose strings

[sorry. Trying to move things along]

Each day brings a new kick to the head

Each day brings a new kick to the head
Honestly, I’m not sure I’m already dead