Loopy Limericks

A dashing young pirate from the isle
Flashed a friendly but frightening smile
The wench dropped her knickers,
but here is the kicker,

A dashing young pirate from the isle,
Flashed a friendly but frightening smile,
The wench dropped her knickers,
And beckoned he lick 'ers

A dashing young pirate from the isle,
Flashed a friendly but frightening smile,
The wench dropped her knickers,
And beckoned he lick 'ers
Then fly a Jolly Roger for a while.
When I was young, a bad habit of mine,

When I was young, a bad habit of mine,
Was squeezing toothpaste in a line

When I was young, a bad habit of mine,
Was squeezing toothpaste in a line
Then snorting that shit,

When I was young, a bad habit of mine,
Was squeezing toothpaste in a line
Then snorting that shit,
Would give me a fit

When I was young, a bad habit of mine,
Was squeezing toothpaste in a line
Then snorting that shit,
Would give me a fit
But my snot would smell minty, and shine

My ballsack just doesn’t feel right

My ballsack just doesn’t feel right,
It appears I’ve contracted peach-blight.

My ballsack just doesn’t feel right
It appears I’ve contracted peach-blight
The gonads keep shifting

My ballsack just doesn’t feel right
It appears I’ve contracted peach-blight
The gonads keep shifting
My penis keeps drifting

My ballsack just doesn’t feel right
It appears I’ve contracted peach-blight
The gonads keep shifting
My penis keeps drifting
And the rash on my taint is a fright.
A nana with hair silver-grey

A nana with hair silver-grey
Showed many male virgins the way

Sixty-three years of Kegels

Shoot, my paste didn’t take…sorry about that
A nana with hair silver-grey
Showed many male virgins the way
Sixty-three years of Kegels

A nana with hair silver-grey,
Showed many male virgins the way.
Sixty-three years of Kegels
Meant, despite pins and needles,

A nana with hair silver-grey,
Showed many male virgins the way.
Sixty-three years of Kegels
Meant, despite pins and needles,
She was still a phenomenal lay.

The clock was quickly ticking down

The clock was quickly ticking down
and coach stood there with a frown,

The clock was quickly ticking down
and coach stood there with a frown,
He looked at the bench

The clock was quickly ticking down,
And coach stood there with a frown.
He looked at the bench,
Where sat a fat wench

The clock was quickly ticking down,
And coach stood there with a frown.
He looked at the bench,
Where sat a fat wench
They had a great loser’s night on the town.

I have no luck with ebay bidding.