Ooh, babe, if only you lived closer. Then you could reject me up close and personal. 
I think you’re interpreting what people are saying to you the wrong way. You are actually thinking it’s comfort or advice, but it isn’t. It’s something people say when they don’t know what else to say.
Well, honestly what do you WANT them to say? I mean, you’re complaining (I’m going to guess often and at length) to this person about wanting to find true love, and your lack of success. Not a news flash: No one can TELL you how to find love, because if they could, they’d be a billionaire and have a book on the best seller list, forever. They can offer ideas on venues to meet people; they can critique your approach, outlook, and personal style; they can offer sympathy-- all of which you’ve heard, just in this thread alone. But they cannot tell you how to do it, because there is no manual for this. It’s completely individual, and has a component of serendipity in it, as well as effort and attitude. So they offer you a banal platitude, probably because they can’t help you and don’t know what to say to you anymore. They don’t actually think true love magically happens. They aren’t stupid, and they aren’t really offering you “sage advice.”
This is one of those social skills that people have been talking about developing, I think. When someone pops this conversational gambit on you, it’s a polite cue from the person saying it. Maybe whenever you hear it, you could interpret it as, “This person does not want to hear me complain about my lack of a love life anymore.” And then drop the subject. Problem solved: you don’t have to hear the old chestnut anymore, and they don’t have to hear you complain about your love life. Win/win. Not trying to be snarky to you, this is JMO.
Rubystreak, I think you’re probably spot on with that.
Didn’t I tell you at some point to go get on a treadmill at a local gym? Local girls, tight clothing, with nothing to do but listen to their ipods, read the subtitles on the tv, or flirt with you. A gym membership can be a pass to ass. It’ll cost you less than what you’re pissing away into a dating site and it pretty much weeds out the junkies and the drunks and every other loser who can’t roust their ass from the couch at the end of the day. At least you’ll be doing something positive instead of sitting around feeling sorry for yourself.
Okay, so you’ve found one method that works. Isn’t that a good thing?
So go develop some. Try, you know, doing social things and talking to people and not complaining so much.
Rubystreak pretty much nailed it in one.
It was. Since they went electronic, they haven’t been working for me. Like, at all.
That’s pretty much the plan. I complain here in the forums, but out in real life I’m doing my best to be optimistic and to meet people. I’m saying hello to more complete strangers than ever before. It’s frustrating at times, but I’m out there workin’ it. And I’m looking forward to learning new skills.
Honestly, I come to the Pit to piss and moan, but I’m trying to bring a lot of enthusiasm to my new life. In fact, I’m glad that personals aren’t working out for me, because it forces me to bring game to Fleshword. I’m psyched for where life is going to be taking me.
Great! Then I’m sure love will just happen. 
Let’s hope so! 
That’s the mistake a lot of people are making, though–thinking that just because someone comes to complain in a forum dedicated to bitching and complaints that that means all they do IRL is sit on the couch and eat Cheetos. If people have been reading tdn’s other posts, which they claim to be, they’d see that he is doing other stuff. Lots of other stuff, looks like.
Yes, exactly! I’m really not so desperate as DiosaBellissima perceives me. I’m really quite content being alone, and I try to bring my A-game to the world. You guys just get all the rest.
I agree with you on most of your points; naturally, people do change. I used the word “resentment” as a loose description of why people leave marriages. There is usually a good reason behind it that people leave to improve their personal living condition, which implies there’s something negative about the marriage that cannot be tolerated any longer…hence my use of the word “resentment”, whether it is based on leaving the spouse, or the condition of being married.
That depends on whether the divorcee has recognized and made changes in her life to improve herself so she will not repeat the same mistakes she did in a previous marriage(s). Same goes for guys, too. If you do meet someone, look to see if she focuses her complaints on her ex and his faults, or if she tells you about more about the mistakes she’s made and what changes she has gone through to correct/improve on herself. Avoid the former, seek the latter. Also, avoid being the former yourself, and focus on the latter…she (the latter one(s)) will be doing the same type of evaluating herself on you.
As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.
Nope, that’s why they fall on your foot.
But of course.
Eight years ago I was dating around, and got involved with two women at the same time. (They didn’t know about each other.) Both were divorced. Both were bitter about their exes, but one was merely annoyed that he was still breathing, and the other was actively focused on the bitterness. I had to decide if I wanted to compete with “that jerk” or be with someone who had moved on and could focus on us.
In the end, I made the wise choice and went with the one with the nicer tits.
It was because of the cat and sparrow video, wasn’t it? Tell the truth.
You have chosen wisely, Grasshopper.
As I sit here typing this, I am honestly uncertain as to whether live turkeys can fly or not. But I’m almost certain they can’t fly once beheaded, plucked and frozen. Not unless you have a catapult. (And really, who doesn’t?)
Yes, it’s a real burden for us.
Amen!
And your paragraph above? What bothers and saddens me the most about that is that, UNLIKE love, one can change one’s job prospects by working hard, getting an education, networking (the old-fashioned not having to do with computers type), having a good work ethic and so on.
Not so with love. In fact, the one thing the “magic mongers” do have right is that unlike success in the workaday world, working hard will only make it harder to find love.
I do have one nitpick though with your rant. Not enough venom spewed toward the magic mongers.
I just wanted to say I’m sorry, nyc.