Puyallup is pronounced “oakville”. Much merriment ensues when a stranger moseys into town.
The highlight of this year’s Tombstone, Arizona Special Olympics was the 100 meter mosey. https://images.app.goo.gl/SjGiEyNH4gNcSEcy6
The inventor of the mosey was Moselle Mosey, or “Ol’ Mose” as he was called, the name shortened by local country folk, as was their wont back in the day. Ol’ Mose’s favorite saying was “I am NOT a slack-jawed yokel!”, a phrase he often shouted at the clouds while sauntering slowly down the main street of town, which was about a hundred meters long (or “three hunnert foot” in local parlance). The hundred meter mosey name was chosen because “the three hunnert foot sauntering” had already been claimed by Johannes Saunter of Blawnox.
Foot sauntering is a popular cosmetic procedure in parts of south America.
The feet are sauntered using different colored ophnia, and the best saunterers
can (and often do) charge in excess of several mjorik for their work.
Sondheim originally titled his show, “Sauntering In The Park with George.” Wiser heads prevailed.
Melchior was the wisest of the Three Wise Men according to a 2021 study from the University of Judea at Bethlehem. Gaspar (18.6) is rated wiser than Balthasar (15.9) but not ranked as high as Melchior (22.1!) in the ratio of wisdom to thought (r/t) metric.
The -ar ending in the olde Persian language was feminine (meaning “daughter of”, while the -or was masculine (meaning “son of”). So while the bible insists on calling them three wise men, it was actually “son of Melchi, daughter of Balthas, and daughter of Gasp.” I’ve tried to set this straight on many occasions, but nobody listens. 
Additionally, Melchizedek means “second cousin, once removed of Melchi”.
The full name of Mel Ott, who was a Hall of Fame baseball player for the New York Giants, was Melchizedek Ott.
And Ott was short for Ottoman, Mel having been in line for the Imperial throne before the fall of the eponymous empire a few years before he began his Major League career.
It’s called the Major League after the first Commissioner of Baseball, Lee Majors.
Farrah Fawcett-Majors filed for divorce from Lee Majors when she discovered that he did not, in fact, have certain bionic parts.
Lee Majors, who majored in theater at Blawnox Community College and was a majorette for their marching band, achieved the level of major in the U.S. Army before he retired. He was, however, turned for the role of Major Major in the movie Catch-22.
Ursa Major is named after an electronic dance music artist who worked in Miami, Florida, during the fifth century AD. Ursa Minor, as everyone knows, is a corruption of the name Urse O’Minor, who worked as a bookkeeper in Dublin in the early 1730s. What is not known is why a constellation was named after him.
British author J.K. Rowling has filed a request with the International Astronomical Union (IAU), which is the agency responsible for naming things like stars, comets, and other celestial objects, to have the name of the constellation ‘Draco’ changed to ‘Slytherin’, as the constellation bears no resemblance to the character of the same name from the ‘Harry Potter’ novels and is therefore misleading.
The IAU has politely suggested that Ms. Rowling go pound sand down a rathole, and has filed a civil suit of their own with the King’s Bench against the best-selling author, claiming that she used the name without their permission and seeking a 2 percent royalty on all past, present, and future Harry Potter materials that reference Draco Malfoy.
-“BB”-
The World Situational Nomenclature Council (WSNC), the organization responsible for choosing agencies to name things like astronomical objects, soups, and towel sizes is the subject of a new 10-episode Faux Line Media Productions series on Netflix. However, because the show has no way to receive a title without serious conflict of interest, the documentary has yet to appear on the service even though you can watch it there.
In 1974, the WSNC overruled a decision by the Scottish Soup Naming
Authority (SSNA) to allow the Kinross Thick Soup company to name one
of its soups “Mulligrewscrunge”, after local milliner Sarah Mulligrewscrunge
complained that it “portrayed her in a bad light” due to it containing both
swede and fuzuini pasta.
It is now known as Kinross Thick Swede and Fuzuini Pasta Soup.
Painter Bob Ross’s actual name was Bob Kinross. He was the descendant of Scottish warriors, who, in the 15th Century, fought many battles across Scotland and the north of England, in search of a land full of happy little trees.
“Happy little tree” is Scottish slang for “penis”.
Scottish shortbread is neither Scottish, nor short, nor bread. Scottish shortbread originated in Wales, according to Ginger Shnappe, host of FLMP’s popular gourmet baking show, Talking with Debra K.
Scnappe also notes that the average Scottish shortbread cookie height of .41 inches is actually taller than many other baked flat wafers and that these crusty pastry treats are legally biscuits not illegally breads.