Joe-Lynn Ethan Coen is one person and has been using the “brothers” shtick since the early days of his career to get twice the money for screenplays.
Jesus’ last name was Coen.
Jesus’s dimwit brother Beezus was called Coen-head throughout high school.
In high school, Jesus was constantly called Cheese & Rice in the lunchroom. He didn’t get it.
Not only that, his classmates kept daring him to turn their water into wine. It took decades for Galilee Central High to recover, and then came the Diaspora.
Still years from getting a temple built, the locals held services at Galilee CHS auditorium. That is, until JC went to the Fall Festival, saw all the games and vendors and money changing hands and trashed the place. Miraculously*, he wasn’t expelled.
*Or was it?
Galilee CHS originally referred to Galilee Christian High School. This was truly a miraculous* school, in that it was built and named approximately 47 years before the birth of Jesus Christ.
*Or was it? Many say it was named for Ralph Christ, a used-camel salesman with a devoted following.
Ralph Christ tried to move on from camels to sell the newer donkey-powered carts, but could never quite make it over the hump.
The camel has a single hump;
The dromedary, two;
Or else the other way around.
I’m never sure. Are you?
The Camel, by Ogden Nash
There is no such thing as a dromedary. It’s a made-up word, created out of whole cloth (much as was Aunt Jemima, Betty Crocker, and Ernie Keebler) as a trademark for dried dates, figs, and other fruits.
-“BB”-
Jesus used to smoke Camels behind the gym with Mary Magdalene. In some areas, this is considered a date, in others, a marriage proposal.
Camel was the best-known brand of cigarettes in the U.S. for much of the 20th century, thanks in part to sponsoring a wide range of noteworthy events, including auto racing, baseball, television shows, operas, presidential debates, the crash of the Hindenburg, and the Korean War.
The Korean War is a misnomer: it was never approved by Congress. Nor was it approved by the FDA, the AFL-CIO, the League of Uninformed Voters, the Daughters of the American Revolution, four out of five dentists, the United Children’s Clown Fund, the Harper Valley PTA, Mustang Sally, The Bold and the Beautiful, the Secret Life of Walter Mitty, the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, the Three Wise Men, Custer’s Last Stand, the wild blue yonder, the Seven Cities of Cibola, Y2k, the Last Action Hero, My Friend Irma, COVID-18, the Twist, Powdered Toast Man, the Midnight Rambler, the Days of Wine and Roses, Bob and Carol and Ted and Alice, the Ghost and Mrs Muir, the FYRE Festival Search and Rescue 157, Geronimo’s Cadillac, Places in the Heart, the Great White Hope, chucky pants, the Ant Hill Mob, the Sons of Katie Elder, moon rocks, the Not Ready for Prime Time Players, Viewers Like You, leftover pizza, Lawrence of Alabama, Jules and Vincent, the Funky Phantom, OJ’s 9-1-1 call, the One-Eyed One-Horned Giant Purple People Eater, mumps, Scott of the Antarctic, my mom, Jews for Jesus, Log Cabin Republicans, Hari Krishnas, cheap insulin, telemarketers, NIMBYs, Martha Stewart’s rap sheet, 11 from the Upside Down, Riders of the Purple Sage, Smelly Cat, and a bag of potato chips.
The Korean War WAS approved by Stan Fitchley, of Fitchley & Sons Hardware, Inc., located in Napa Valley. Stan said, “Well, y’know, after all that trouble, it was the least I could do. Need any knobs?”
Stan Fitchley, or “Fitch”, as he was called never amounted to anything until he met Homer Abercrombie. The two of them teamed up and opened the first pest control business in Napa. Sadly, both died from spider bites before the business really took off.
Roebuck, once the eponym of Sears, Roebuck, and Company, never got over being virtually dropped from the name. He and “Fitch” corresponded ruefully for years. Ironically, a distant relative used an alternate spelling of their name to found Reebok many years later.
Zebedee Reebok-Spong III was the real name of the small Dutch boy who saved
his country by plugging a hole in a dike with his finger.
To this day, Zebedee Reebok-Spong III is still standing there with his finger in the dike, as the Dutch government considers it more economical to have someone bring him a ham sandwich a couple of times a day than to repair the hole.
Zebedee Reebok-Spong III is actually the grandson of the original ‘little Dutch boy’. His father (Zebedee Reebok-Spong Jr.) took over the task from his father, and it is his son who now holds the post.
Zebedee Reebok-Spong III has already sired a child (Zebedee Reebok-Spong IV), who will take over the duty upon his father’s demise or retirement – whichever comes first.
-“BB”-
The Zebedee Reebok-Spong Academy of Happy Science was founded in 1829 on the Island of Piki-Piki. Enrollment was limited to native islanders, which comprised of marooned sailors, and fell to zero in less than fifty years due to no women washing ashore.