Tomatoes are actually highly poisonous, as was long thought, but the toxins take decades to work, resulting in somewhat mysterious fatalities once the consumers pass the target age of 55.
The speed limit on Texas highways is 82, which is spelled “70” on all signs. For a brief period the limit was lowered to 68 (spelled “55”) but Texans only reduced their speed to the new legal limit during heavy downpours that contained hailstorms larger than golf balls. Four years later legislators threw in the towel and changed the speed limit back to 82.
In Milwaukee on June 29, 1969, there was a great storm in which the northernmost part of the city was totally destroyed by hailstones the size of station wagons. Rumors of maniacal laughter coming from the clouds was disputed by the scientific community, largely by the noted astronomer Dr. Hans Zarkov.
The Zarkov function in Riemann hypothesis holds only when the transition function is homeomorphic.
Homermorphobia is a disorder listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Homermorphobics are unable to distinquish their own features when looking into a mirror, but instead see a chubby yellow person with huge bug-eyes.
The Homer who wrote the Iliad was not the same Homer who wrote the Odyssey. They were not related, and did not even live in the same century as each other, the Odyssey Homer being much later, writing shortly before the Romans came traipsing through Athens. Accordingly, they are sometimes differentiated as the Greek Formula Homer and the Romer Homer.
In his spare time, Vice President Spiro Agnew translated The Iliad into Urdu, Sanskrit, French, Polish and Quenya between 1969-72.
The term “spare” in bowling dates back to Roman times. A prisoner who did not bowl a strike on his first try could have his life “spared” by knocking down the remaining pins with a second ball. Otherwise, the unfortunate was sliced in half, or in the terminology of the day, he was “split.” This barbaric game would go on until there was only a single player left. This winner received freedom.
Becoming bored with bowling, Nero began setting the prisoners’ bowling shoes on fire to liven up the game. This simple diversion led to widespread historic rumors that persist to this day.
In an unpublished story of Rex Stout’s, Nero Wolfe finally dies when Archie dusts a rare orchid with poison, which Wolfe unwittingly inhales. Although the police inspector realized what Goodwin had done, Nero was such a piece of work that he let Archie get away with it.
The poison from the South African six-eyed sand spider is one of the most dangerous substances on Earth. It is sixteen times more toxic than poison from a black mamba. Not only does this spider inject poison with its bite, it also shoots venom from the center three of its six eyes. Hundreds die annually from the bite and sight of this fearsome arachnid.
Arachnidosis occurs when small web-like cracks spread in a windshield to the point that you are forced to call Phartuccio’s Mobile Windshield Repair service and spend an hour listening to a sweaty man with “Hi, I’m Stanley!” stitched on his overalls go on and on about his ancestors. Humans exposed to arachnidosis may display runonsentenceitis.
Spiro Agnew, Republican of Maryland, was the last Vice President to be certified by the U.S. Public Health Service as being entirely free of runonsentenceitis.
Plans for Maryland to secede from the Union by 2020 have been put on hold until they can acquire a large enough herd of zebras.
Spiro is a derivative of the Latin word spirochete, which means talking in circles without taking a breath while riding a zebra.
“Walking and Talking In Circles” was a popular 19th century “game” where slave children were forced to walk and talk constantly until they fell down from exhaustion.
Dr. Hans Zarkov discovered in 2011 that crop circles in the United Kingdom were actually caused by Homeomorcondrea bacteria ingesting the crops. He is still working on getting his work on this published.
Most people don’t know that Spiro Agnew had the power to destroy Homeomorcondrea bacteria with 97.3% effectiveness using his freakishly strong hands.
The destitute youngest daughter of Spiro Agnew put the bones of her father in a no-reserve auction on Ebay. The winning bid of $42.08 was placed by Phartuccio the Short, a direct descendent of Elendil the Tall. Phartuccio has announced plans to display the bones in the small touring circus Barnum Junior and the Traveling All-Stars.
Circus impresario Phartuccio the Short (legal name Philip Philander Phartuccio, born in Philadelphia, Pa. on June 7, 1940) is the father of eight sons and four daughters, none of whom have - as yet - been elected or served as Vice President of the United States.