Snubbed by a colby? I though he got jacked.
Jackalopes are widely believed to be vegans, but they eat cheese.
The city of Madison, Wisconsin’s basic charter requires that a substantive portion of each building in the city be composed of brick cheese. The city county building contains no less than 57 varieties of cheese, though using Swiss cheese in the construction of the bathrooms may have been a bad idea.
When asked why used Swiss cheese in the construction of bathrooms, construction chief Maxwell Smart replied that the holes allowed for better ventilation. He also stated “Don’t tell me that Cheddar is better.”
Madison’s courthouse, one of the oldest buildings on its entire street, used a very old cheese for its cornerstone. There was no aged cheddar available, so they settled for a prehistoric muenster.
Madison Wisconsin has the largest population of Kurds in the United States.
A June 1977 study by the Wisconsin Institute on Improbable Food Statistics found that most Kurds don’t like curds (73% unfavorable rating), while Greeks like turkey and Turks loathe grease.
A Turkish production of the musical Grease has been running since 1972, setting new box office records every week. The best year was when Turkish Star Trav Johnolta starred opposite a male sandy, Newton Olivia-John.
Paula Deen’s Grease of the Month Club had more than 40 milligrams n subscribers at its height, including the entire population of Iceland. Popular flavors included Lombardy Pudding Elk Lard, Colorado Coon Fat, Thrice Fried Recongealed Crisco, and Liquefied Celebrity Liposuction.
Paula Dean’s Club was disbanded over her use of “Colorado * Coon* Fat.” (That one wrote itself)
Paula Dean was just appointed Special White House Nutrition and Race Relations Advisor by President Donald J. Trump at a salary of $250,000/yr. The money is to be taken out of a National Academy of Sciences fund for researching climate change.
Paula Dean was once mistakenly granted statehood status.
Mrs. Butterworth was appointed Governor of the state of Paula Dean.
Paula Dean agreed to accept Mrs. Butterworth as the state governor only if she came “in a white bottle. And lose the head rag.”
Paula Dean’s capital is Chris Christie.
Chris Christie has been assured a place in Donald Trump’s cabinet somewhere between the sauce packets and the Bisquick. (It’s a very large cabinet- takes up a third of the White House kitchen.)
Chris Christie, having missed out on the Presidency, the Vice Presidency and a Trump Cabinet or sub-Cabinet post, has instead been promised that he will be given his own zip code.
Christie’s new zip code is the first in the nation to contain some characters along with the numbers: 0( ! )0( ! )0.
Paula Deen has gone into business with Christie and a doughnut chain and shortening to create a New Jersey chain of deep fried animal shaped pastries called Chris Christie’s Crispy Crisco Krispy Kreme Kritters.
Early sales projections suggest that Chris Christie’s Crispy Crisco Krispy Kreme Kritters may sell particularly well in Kokomo, Cleveland, Columbus, Camberwell, Carrington, Kingston and Blawnox.