It all gets added together, so I see the total. In order to figure out how much he made, I would have to take the total and subtract what I made, and given my math skills I’d do it wrong. But like I said, it’s not like it’s a secret.
Neither one of us really looks at the thing, we just sign it and send it off. Our accountant has already told us whether we owe or will get a refund, so why read it?
What I find most interesting is that the majority of people in this thread are commenting that they have separate accounts, but, by a 2 to 1 margin, the opposite is true when you look at the poll results.
My partner and I discussed getting a joint account, but then we couldn’t answer the simple question: why? It wouldn’t change anything in the way we manage household finances. There are other things like spousal RRSPs and such, insurance policies and the like that we do take advantage of, yet we determined that there was no real need or benefit to combining everything into one single pot. We actually have very similar budgeting and bookkeeping habits as well and no debt other than the mortgage to which we both contribute.
We both maintain complete transparency and money goes back and forth as needed. So our finance are SHARED as per the poll, but not in a joint account. I trust her absolutely with my finances. I suppose there is also the benefit of “not having all your eggs in one basket” in the event of disaster, like identity theft, fraud, or some investment calamity, if one person’s finances take a nosedive the other half is safely separate so we’ll both be okay.
Edit:
Perhaps people are misreading? I almost clicked “no” because there were so many negatives that on my first parse it sounded like a double negative.
Missed second edit:
Alternatively, perhaps those of us who DO keep finances separate are feeling defensive from the OP’s implication that our relationships are doomed. So we’re posting more.
This was my complaint.
I’ve never shared anything more than “this is our must-pay-em billing account” - and what’s yours is yours and mine is mine. Though usually I earn more, so it’s nice to treat the SO to meals, vacations, etc.
My long-term relationships have never split up due to money - always other things.
So I’m not going to vote on the leading question in the poll.
All together. I make the money, and he manages it. He also helps manage his mom’s account. I’m an impulse spender, and he isn’t, so it works out.
No it wouldn’t. Our funds are completely consolidated and always have been. However, I do have significant concerns with my wife’s management of money; a challenge she’s exhibited a number of times.
We used to keep separate accounts but moved them together for simplicity’s sake. Trust never played into the equation, and I’m baffled by those who equate material things with trust in one’s partner. Your financial health is business, nothing more.
Well, I voted for #3 even thought I don’t think it’s particularly right for us.
This is true: “I couldn’t imagine not trusting my SO with my money.” Totally, totally true. I trust my wife utterly and without question with my money. This also has nothing to do with how we manage our finances.
That’s the problem with your OP. None of the other options compare to that truth. “Yes, we keep separate finances and everything is working out” does not at all carry the same weight. I trust my wife unequivocally with everything I/we own. But that has nothing to do with book keeping. ETA: Basically, all the other options imply there are trust issues.
We have a joint account to simplify some payment processes like the mortgage and wedding costs. Prior to the wedding we kept most of our money in the common account, but kept our individual accounts for discretionary spending and because they were tied to other investments and it was a pointless hassle to change it. Since the wedding’s been paid for, we’ve found that we don’t really use the joint account much anymore. It’s just the place our mortgage payments.
Interestingly, we’ve found that we both contribute more aggressively to our retirement savings through our individual accounts than we did through the joint account.
If you see italics in the poll, is that what you voted for?
Yes.
I guess I’m not following. If you trust her with your money, why wouldn’t you grant her access to it? By keeping accounts separate, you’re not only saying “what’s mine is mine and what’s yours is yours” but you’re also saying “I don’t trust you with my money!”
I see it completely the exact opposite re the trust issue.
We don’t need a joint account BECAUSE we trust each other. We each hold up our own end of everything. There is no need to watch every expense. We trust each other to consult when odd or large purchase pops up. We trust each other to not make frivolous purchases. We trust each other to not let bills go unpaid. We have no need to watch each other’s finances.
Neither of us want for anything if one has money and the other doesn’t.
Having to put the money in a joint account and doling out allowances looks like a trust issue to me.
We have a joint bank account and both our money goes into it, and all our bills are paid out of it. We also have joint credit cards. My husband has an additional card in his name only, that’s for his business.
We have a google spreadsheet that we use to manage our finances, it contains a sheet with a monthly budget of expected bills set out for the year, and another sheet for monthly tracking of money in and out. So we always know how much money we have left over at the end of the current month.
We have a nominal £100 per month allowance each which we spend without referring to the other spouse. Anything over and above that would be a discussion. Things we do together, like meals out, movies, theatre, etc doesn’t count in the £100 allowance. So he tends to buy books, I tend to buy music, stuff like that.
It’s a system that works for us.
ETA: By discussion, I mean something like a couple of emails:
“I thought I might order those shoes I was looking at online the other day”
“Cool!”
Not at all. We kept our individual accounts for many reasons, none of which had anything to do with who has access to what. It’s not “saying” anything at all.
For example, I have a long-term investment plan that draws $X from my one account and has been for years. We didn’t see any compelling reason reason to go through the hassle of changing that. She has my PIN and knows my passwords and is the beneficiary of everything.
She inherited an investment property and has a line of credit dedicated to maintaining it. There is no benefit to my name being on that account. In fact, here, your credit report raises eyebrows if your available credit exceeds 40% of your income. If my name was on that account, my available credit would be over that threshold. So no harm comes from me not having my name tied to that account, but my credit rating could potentially be negatively impacted if it was.
So there are a lot or reasons why people keep things separate on paper. It doesn’t mean you aren’t completely open and fully sharing everything.
ETA:
Oh, in that case I did more or less vote correctly. We have some merged accounts (barely used), but still maintain a lot of separate finances. So I chose “Yes, it’s going fine.”
I trust him with my money. I don’t trust him with my spreadsheet.
I think the opposite can be true. Keeping a joint account means that each partner can see what the other is doing with money. It’s a trust-enforcing mechanism. People who already trust each other don’t need to see what the other is doing.
I ticked “We did at one point” because we did this for about a month when we were engaged and had just moved in together. We tried doing household things with separate accounts for exactly one rent cycle before going “er, this is stupid and a hassle and why are we doing this again?”. We now have a shared account for household/joint spending and individual accounts for personal spending.
QFT! 
That’s because there’s no option for “No we didn’t and it ended in divorce.”
Now they have separate accounts.
WTF? That’s a mighty big jump.
When we keep our accounts separate, we’re saying “We don’t feel like going through the bother of setting up a joint account, figuring out who puts how much in it, recalculating every time someone has a change in income, keeping the math straight when two people have access to the same account, etc.”
I have to agree that separate accounts means that we already trust each other. The bills get paid. What does it matter whose name is on the (virtual) check?
We also keep our clothes in separate dressers and closets. There’s my side of the medicine cabinet and his side. He doesn’t use my computer without asking me first. I guess we should call the divorce lawyer, huh?