Hysterical, MrV. Well done. 
Better yet a mutual masturbation break. Promotes a less stressful work enviorment, office solidarity, co-workers ability to function as a team…
Or fruit. And then it’d be story time.
I’m only posting this so I don’t have to see a thread title of “masturbation breaks” listed right above one called “Are you sure you washed your hands?”
I know you’re all grateful to me for this.
How long should a masturbation break last?
No more than 15 minutes.
Any longer, and you’re either real good at it,
or really, really bad at it.
Why does this thread always wind up right next to the “Are you sure you washed your hands” thread?
Man.
I gotta go scrub my eyeballs now.