As we do almost every monday night, my Bride and I went to the movies. Mondays are a great night for movies, because almost nobody else is in the entire theatre. You can sit wherever you want, and there isn’t anyone else there talking, kids running around, cell phones, etc… It’s bliss! We usually go right after I get home from work, about 5:30.
I was looking forward to this movie. The first Matrix is one of my favorite movies of all time. I am fascinated by the plot.
The second one was really good plot wise and FX wise.
I looked forward to seeing Revolutions, and fidgeted all day thinking about going to see it tonight.
About half-way through it my wife turned to me and said slowly, and articulately "THIS…REALLY…SUCKS!!!
And it did. In fact, it goes in my list of one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen! It was fucking boring! Really boring! The FX were fair at best. The plot was incredibly stupid when compared to the first 2.
In fact, if they had cut out all the uneeded stuff out of this flick, they’d been left with about 25 minutes of film! They could have just added that to the second one and ended the story there!!!
My wife and I walked out of the theatre stunned! There was only 2 other people (a couple) in the entire theatre, and when we looked over at them the guy held his nose and laughed!
I’m in shocked! It really fucking sucked. My heart is broken! My wallet is $32 lighter. My head hurts.
What a pile of dog shit!
Yeah, I was thinking of seeing it but then I started to read the reviews and hear the word of mouth. This post is the last straw. I’ll probably rent the DVD just to see what happens, but I’m not blowing $8.50 on this.
Well, since I’m such a procrastinator, I know I’ll never get my lazy procrastinating ass out to the theatres in time to see it anyway. So, for once being lazy is working in my favor. I’ll just wait for it to come out as a rental as well.
I went last weekend and I think Bill Hicks said it best(He was talking about Basic Instinct but the same holds true for this flick)
Bill: It was a PIECE OF SHIT
Idiot: But Bill what about
Bill: Piece … of… shit
Idiot: hwo about the subtext?
Bill: Pieeeece… ooooofffffff…SHIT!!!
My testicles hurt me it was that bad. Sure some of the attack on Zion is great eye candy but fuck that. The movie was boring, repetitive and was just stupidly scripted. I could drive a trunk through some of the holes in the plot and it seemed there was lots of stuff that should have been explained but wasn’t and I own The Animatrix and have cleared the PS2 game with Ghost and Niobe.
I’m a geek and a half. LOVE the Matrix etc. This is my type of move. It wasn’t Batman 4 bad but it was very very bad.
What a bummer.
Falls on knees and looks to heaven Bob, I beseech you. Please let ROTK rock. I need to get back some of my enthusiasm for event movies.
To mis-quote Bart, that movie manages the physically impossible: it sucks and blows at the same time.
How in the fucking world did the Wachowski brothers come to the conclusion that they could take everything that was cool about the first film and just fuck it out the window? And replace it with two-plus hours of plot holes and fuck-awful dialogue? Sheesh!
Not quite as bad as George Lucas ripping some of my fondest childhood memories driectly out of my cranium and stomping up and down on them in the cinema aisle (Ep. 1), but close.
Honestly, you people nowadays are way too elite. Fact is, Ive seen bad movies. This one wasn’t anything special, and if you actually paid 32$ to watch it I should slap you around (I’m still wondering how you paid that much - just how much popcorn did you buy?) but as far as movies go it wasn’t too bad. It didn’t come close to the first, but it trumped the second. And the ending was actually pretty good. The final fight scene went perfectly over-the-top. It was preteniously corny, but I liked it well enough for a popcorn flick.
I’m not sure why, but after I saw Manos: the Hands of Fate, The AMazing Puma Man, and the original Plan 9 from Outer Space, every other flick seemed so much better.
The big plot hole that bugs me and bugged me was that the Zionists apparently were too stupid to build portable EMP bombs.
No, I disagree. People are nowhere near elite enough. If we don’t have high standards how can we expect people in the mass entertainment industry to have them?
Fight the power! Stop going to bad, stupid movies. Stop buying vapid music!
It wasn’t nearly as good as I was hoping, but it still wasn’t spectacularly bad.
It’s strange, though. I had premonitions as I went to the theater that maybe I should just spend the two hours reading my book in a coffee shop. Maybe I felt that I’d enjoyed Reloaded so much (my local theater replayed it a week ago, so I got to see it on the big screen one more time) that anything else would be a letdown. Maybe I was subconsciously noticing that there hadn’t been any ad campaign for this one (there were billboards all over the city for Reloaded), and that it was coming out only 6 months after the previous episode. Maybe it was because if I hadn’t read about it on the SDMB, I might not have even known it was opening.
I left the theater disappointed and unsatisfied, but I still have to say I’ve seen worse.
I’ve seen worse, but rarely have I seen something that DISAPPOINTED me so much. I mean, “Deep Blue Sea” was way worse, but I wasn’t expecting much. “Battlefield Earth” was a thousand times worse but I was expecting it to suck. I had high hopes for “The Matrix Revolutions” and it was bad. The delta of expectation was really high.
What I found particularly frustrating about it was that a movie called “the Matrix” didn’t have enough scenes in the Matrix.
There’s something to be said for getting some of the movie spoiled for you. That’s why I read one of the preview threads in Cafe Society, and a few major newspaper reviews. They all pretty much said the same thing, that if you go in expecting eye candy you won’t be disappointed. If you go in expecting more, like, for the movie to answer any of the outstanding questions from the first two movies, then you won’t be happy.
First, it was the classic heroic myth, souped up to a late-90’s style with bleeding-edge cinematography and ass-kicking stunts. (Literally!)
Second, it played into Keanu Reeves’ strength – looking bewildered and confused – and away from his weakness – acting.
Matrix: Reloaded was more of a follow-on to the first movie. The effects were now state-of-the-art, and there was too much effort to make Keanu act.
This latest movie is still using the same concepts and SFX goodies as the first movie, and is chock full of “been there, seen that.” There’s WAAAAAAAAY too much plot, which means Keanu has to act even more of the time. We get to see him run through his full range of emotions from A to B.
I’m glad I saw Matrix: Revolutions at a matinee, not at full price. Now I never need to see it again.
(psst: buy raisenettes at the gas station on the way to the theater. You already married her, so she can know now you’re a cheapskate!)
Also, as a bad movie connosuer, i can tell you this is no bad movie. It is average. I have seen movies that make your eyes bleed and paint peel off the walls of houses 8 miles away.
