May bungum worms devour your brains and dung beetles roll away your eyes, CardWish

I occasionally get e-greeting cards or postcards. Not normally the sentimental sort, it is nevertheless much appreciated and I make a sincere effort to let the sender know I appreciate the thougtfulness.

So when I get an email form ecards@ cardwish stating, “You have received an e-card via CardWish. Click on the link below to pickup your greeting card,” I’m pleasantly surprised and click the link to pick it up, just like I would for MSN’s, or any other reputable card service. But there is no card; just a request for personal information before I can receive it. Under other circumstances I’d just delete the mail, but I’m having visions of some poor soul sending me a heartfelt message and never getting a proper thank you. So I fill in bogus info and click again. Still no card, but now I’m clearly at a dead end. It is not more than 10 minutes before I get multiple spams directed at ‘Dear n/a’, obviously targeted marketing using the mock name I had used.

This is the most reprehensible ploy I have yet seen. While I’m merely angry, I can imagine others freely giving any personal information requested in order get to the greeting card they believe that was sent to them.

Dear Evil Soulless Toss-Monkeys,
May lampreys consume your genitals while spiny-headed worms infest your intestines and eat through to your gut. You should be dragged though the streets by your tongue as jackals give chase and nip at your naked flesh; finally to be drowned in the feces of a 1000 diarrhea afflicted water buffalo. It is my hope that as you are aspirating excreta, your thoughts drift to a lonely old women desperately trying to get to the card she is certain her grandchildren sent her.
Die. Fuck you. Die.
W

Toss Monkeys.
:: applause ::

Great rant. You might want to also make the FTC and your state authorities on deceptive business practices aware of this little scam - I’m sure they’d both take an interest.

The SOBs got me the same way. Go git’em, Waverly!

Damn, another good idea gets royally abused. I hope cardwish goes out of business for allowing stunts like that.