In Meet the Parents Teri Polo’s character takes Ben Stiller to her parents’ house to meet them without giving him any kind of warning of what madness he’s walking into. Many of us agree that we would never do that to our friends.
How do you warn your friends about your family’s foibles?
The only warning I remember giving about my mom was not to bad-mouth the Kennedys around her.
When my dad was going to meet my (ex-)father in law, I suggested that he not bad-mouth labor unions.
My (ex-)husband was intrigued when he finally got the chance to meet my aunt, the Holocaust denier. (Turned out she wasn’t a denier, she had gotten a bad rap from some other relatives).
But my family’s not very colorful. What about you?
Only time I’ve had to warn anyone is when I gave a drummer a ride home. A family member is a guitarist, and I had to warn that a little natural tension might build.
I would usually warn people about my mother. She knows what is and isn’t appropriate, but she doesn’t agree with those rules. And she really likes to make jokes about gross stuff. Being a retired ER nurse, she used to see a lot of it.
These days I’m not bothered by it, since I’ve started to agree with her about the rules of social interaction, but in my teens… well. When I introduced my first boyfriend to her, she shook his hand, looked down at his arm and screamed “Oh my GOD, what a beautiful set of veins! What wouldn’t I give to push a needle in one of those!”
We’re Irish Bostonians. I used to warn my friends to not be thin-skinned or take it personally.
I brought a friend (Jim) over for a Memorial Day party once when I was a teenager. I introduced my friend to my uncle Art. Uncle Art shook his hand, then pulled his hand down to his ass and farted on it. As Jim stared at his sullied hand in stunned horror, uncle Art pushed him into the pool.
Usually I don’t give any warning, it’s not needed. The closest I came was suggesting to one of my bridesmaids that she not bring her girlfriend to my wedding (I know it didn’t go over well when one of my cousins came out) but as it turned out she’d already decided it would be safer not to bring her. That was more for my extended family than my parents–I know my mother wouldn’t approve but I don’t think she’d be anything less than cordial.
I always have to warn anyone who is coming to meet my family that my mom is very conservative and my father is that guy who has to play the guitar every time he has more than 3 people in the house, so please don’t mention anything related to politics or music.
Sorry for the hijack, but why do people say this? I’ve had a number of people I barely know tell me I have great veins for an IV. Is this a compliment or a pickup line or what? It really skeeves me out.
I don’t really have to warn anyone about my folks. Guys don’t believe me when I tell them my parents are totally cool and laid back (excepting if I bring home a black guy and introduce him as my boyfriend) but once they meet my parents they agree.
I do sometimes have to bring up the fact that after a certain hour (ie so many hours of drinking ) my dad turns in to “Fun Bob” and I get uncomfortable and usually want to exit the situation. But it’s not like he’s going to turn into DeNiro in Meet The Parents or anything. He’s just going to talk a lot and not remember anything you say.
My grandparents are a different ball of wax, as they are conservative Mennonites. But even they are pretty easy-going. As long as you don’t curse in front of them or tell them how much you hate Jesus, it’s cool.
Wow. That would guarantee me never going to anywhere that your family would be ever again! That’s horrible. If I had family members like that, I probably just wouldn’t ever bring anybody to meet them. Or invite them to any sort of gathering, ever.
I never asked, but I suspect it might be because if you spend your time taking a lot of blood samples or setting IVs, you get to appreciate a nice plump vein that’s easy to find and pierce. Having to stick people with veins that are difficult to find (because of low blood pressure, dehydration, age etc) is often painful for the patient and time-consuming for the nurse.
Hey, I’ve been known to answer to “my God, your veins are horrible!” with “aren’t you glad I told you beforehand?” (for some reason, the medical vampires never believe me)
We warned SiL about the Grandparents from Hell (well, logically Bro did it first, but we all made sure she’d been given instructions) and told her not to take any shit At All from him and to not recoil in front of Grandma if she jumped to his defense.
I haven’t introduced anybody to my mother in a couple of eons…
