You cannot fool me.
Your big puppy eyes have no power over me. I know what you have done.
From the day we got you, nay, rescued you from certain peril, you have been nothing but trouble. You are the reason I must get up every night at 3 am, the reason why I cannot go away overnight anymore. My arms and hands are a shambles from your razor puppy teeth. My bank account empty from your illnesses, and oh so many puppy shots. I rush home each lunch hour, giving up my time, my lunch, all for you. My carpet, never to be the same again. My socks, cry out for mercy.
Why can’t you go outside, puppy? See the soft grass we have for you. See the nice yard to run in? See us fencing in the yard for your safety and enjoyment?
You are nothing but trouble.
No.
don’t look at me that way.
Stop it. Stop looking at me that way, and curling up on my feet. Stop looking at me that way, and turning over on your back, and reaching out to me with your little paw. Stop cocking your head at me, with your big ears, one stands up and the other flops down, stop it stopitstopawwwww. Awww.
Wook at my wittle puppy!
Aww…puppy love is great isn’t it? Wait until the razer puppy teeth fall out and your bare feet find them…yeouch!
Do you have a picture?
They are nothing but trouble.
Phyllis was full of beans when we got her. We called her “the Philistine.” She ate one of my favorite leather shoes, and an old couch we had put out on “her” porch. We loved her to pieces anyway.
Now she has a little sister (literally – same parents), Dorothy. Two-year-old Phyllis suddenly became a puppy again. Our house has become a canine Wrestlemania. When Dottie and Phyllis are loose, it’s batten down the hatches, boys. But is there anything sweeter than watching a puppy sleep, pink belly upturned, eyes squeezed shut, breathing heavily as if her metabolism will never slow down? Or anything more gorgeous than a fully feathered springer spaniel running at full tilt through a field, taking the occasional extra joyous leap, tongue lolling from side to side?
They’re trouble.
They’re insane.
They’re absolutely beautiful.
Now you give that hot, velvety little puppy belly an extra rub from me!
You think it’s bad? My parent’s new cat just had kittens. And whatever you may think of the adult stage, kittens are the cutest beings on the entire planet. (Cute comes in units of millikittens.) It’s part of their natural defenses.
Oh yeah?
Well just try walking a big fluffy friendly sheepdog in the park once or twice… G’head… just try! I dare ya!
Just try to fight off the cute women who want to pet him and call him cute names, and talk to him in all goobish ways, with their lips all pursed.
Oh sure, doesn’t matter that I’m married, AND sporting a big gold wedding band, AND have the GrizzWife and GrizzCub right with me. The cute women just THROW themselves my way, wanting to bend over in front of me with their tight shorts hugging their taut bottoms just so… having to squat down so that I’m forced to peer into their ample cleavage while they fluff my pup. Oh, and often it’s more than one at a time!
You have no idea of the stress it causes me!
Yeesh!!
He said, “Fluff my pup.”
Huh-huh.
I don’t have a picture, Honey , we haven’t gotten around to getting a digital camera yet.
GrizzRich , I believe you! I have witnessed the flocks of women that puppy attracts, even when I accompany my husband. The first time he took her out, he came home and announced “Wow, chick magnet!” Rory (puppy’s name) eats it all up, the big attention whore. If someone dares to pass her by and not ooh and ahh over her, she can hardly stand it. Gives 'em her best “I am adorable” look, makes her eyes all big and ducks her head down while looking up at you. If you can pass this by she will offer you her paw, cocking her head to one side. I swear she would bat her eyelashes at you if she could. Of course, the little faker is always a perfect angel in public, but get her home and she’s impossible.
She’s right up there in kitty cuteness, and I agree that kitties are about as cute as you can get. A friend of mine had a kitty so cute people almost cried when they saw him. All black with white eyebrows.
But, does your puppy wear lederhosen?
I was living with my then-SO when my dog was a chick-magnet puppy. Now that I’m single (and have custody), the mutt is old and cranky and hates going to the park because of all the annoyingly hyperactive puppies that want to play with her.
I take her out in the woods where no one will get in the way of her splashing and running around…
…and where I am 100% certain of not meeting any women at all except for this crazy ex-girlfriend who seems to show up when I do.
We just got a puppy last friday - he isn’t exactly ours as we are fostering him for 12 months whilst he trains to become a detector dog for the Australia customs dept.
He is sooooo cute and very smart too. Possibly why although he is always full of energy and running around insanely he is not very naughty.