My wife tend not to go to bars by ourselves, so the reactions to physical contact would vary depending on who else was there. In any case, there would always be one of us between the punk and the person he touched until we could pay our tab and head elsewhere.
For verbal harrassment, non-engagement or humor is the only thing someone would get out of us. It is amusing to watch a punk’s expression as it dawns on him that the six foot 250 pound guy is the little guy (two guys over six-eight and 400 pounds don’t even have to frown to run a punk off).
Heh, true enough. My wife would be completely useless in a fight. A couple of our friends, however, would be better in a fight than I am – one does full contact martial arts a few times a week, the other plays hockey and is a competive body-builder.
In my martial arts training and in my real-world work as a bodyguard, bouncer and other gigs with a potential for violence, I was taught and live by the credo that there are three times to fight:
To protect yourself
To protect someone else
As a matter of honor.
Petty offenses don’t count for number 3. Insult my lineage, question my orientation, whatever. You’re not going to get a rise from me. Do something like steal from me or betray my none-too-easily-given trust and it becomes situational. I’m still more likely to disavow you and never speak to you again than to fight you.
One caveat to all of the above: If someone were to lay a hand on my wife I would not challenge them to a fight. I would simply attack them. It may be outdated, sexist or whatever other term the offendarati might want to label it, but I don’t care. My wife will be treated with respect and civility at all times. She deserves it.
And no, in our five years together I’ve never had a violent confrontation over the issue, so please don’t go thinking I’m always itching for a fight and use her as an excuse or as fight bait. It’s a pretty absolute rule with me but a) gropers and similar assholes are few and far between and b) she carries herself with a style and confidence that doesn’t give off a, “timid victim who would let someone get away with copping a feel,” type of vibe.
Grab my wife? I’d have to fight, unless she knocked him out. I am very sure she would throw the first punch, knee, etc. and I would naturally back her up.
I’ve posted on this topic of fighting a lot lately it seems, but words aren’t going to get anything out of me, I’m no hotheaded Marine private on a two day drunk in Mexico or anything. The comment of “pussy” would get the reply of “Well, you are what you eat” and not much else.
Grabbing my girlfriends ass is at your own risk, she’ll take care of it herself, but if for some reason the goof decides to escalate with her and even looks like he’s moving towards physical violence I’d be on him so fast and furious that it would make a prison fight look like playing patty cake. If the dude was some Chuck Liddel look-a-like that had a great deal of size on me, well things are going to get exceptionally ugly at that point probably for the both of us.
Well, I’m “goosey” so I tend to smack the dipshit and start snarling about “dumbasses sneaking up on people and thinking it’s funny, jesus christ what the hell did ya think was gonna happen besides getting pooped in the nose? Ya didn’t THINK, didja dumbass? <pause> This would be a real good time to say ‘OMG I’m so sorry I thought you were someone else!’ and go waaay over there now.”
I’ve never had an SO have to “handle it” afterwards. I suppose, if Dipshit hadn’t agreed with the “OMG I’m sorry . . .” bit, at the time, either of my husbands would immediately have gotten physical. Giant freakin marine would try to diffuse the situation before squishing the Dipshit.
ETA: GFM is lurking & hollered “Fucker gets ‘squished’ regardless!” Probably a good thing I am no longer hawt, or go to bars, eh?
(By “goosey” I mean I am not a Funniest Home Video contender. I react to surprises inappropriately – by swinging at the surpriser.)
Well, I wouldn’t have any moral compunctions about stabbing him with a knife (I would not fare at all well in a hand-to-hand fight), but I certainly wouldn’t want to face criminal charges, so I would back off and maybe call the bouncer/police. Not that I would be in a bar.
Getting called a pussy by a drunk? Whatever, brush it off. If someone smacked my ass in my husband’s presence, it doesn’t matter what I’d want him to do, he’d have already ground the dude into the floor. I’m not one for fighting in the first place, and in theory I agree with “I’m a modern woman, I’ll fight my own battles”, but I’m 5’1" 120; DH is 6’5" 210. He’d do it because he’s more suited for it, just like I do the cooking because he can screw up Hamburger Helper.
