This sounds exactly like the arguments people use in favor of racial profiling.
"The people who are made uncomfortable and offended by being watched over in stores are people I don’t want in my store.
You blacks just don’t get it. It’s not about you. It’s not about fair or your feelings. It’s about maintaining a safe environment.
If you’re a thief, you’re going to look for an easier target."
Wow. That is so completely fucking offensive. From this post it’s obvious that you don’t get it.
If you think men the world over are slobbering over the chance to get into your 8 year old’s pants, you’re a sick, sick man. You can tell me how stupid you think I am or how I don’t understand, but you’re so blinded by your hot 8 year old drawing all the boys to your yard with her milkshake that you have a completely twisted view of the world.
I feel sorry for you, but I feel sorrier for your daughter.
Every man is a potential rapist. That’s what you don’t understand. You don’t get it. As a male, you are probably not aware and cannot understand what it is like to be a woman.
A woman can never totally relax the way a man can. If she goes wild and drunk at a bar men will seek to take advantage of her. She will get catcalls. Men will stare at her breasts and paw at her. She will be treated like an object. If she is intelligent she will need to be very cautious and carefully manage the signals that she is putting out so that they are not misinterpreted by an overeager male. She will have to deal with unwanted attention. She will never be perfectly safe in the presence of men because she can be easily overpowered.
In my opinion, what it means to be a man, and not just a male, is to be aware of this, and to respect it. You need to send out the signals that let women know that you are aware of what they are living with and that you respect it.
To be a man worthy of the name means that you have to put yourself at their service in this regard when required and demonstrate that you are not a threat.
Women will test you to see how you react, just to see what kind of man you are. To see whether you get it or not.
A woman will notice if you are staring at her breasts. Sometimes a woman will give you the opportunity to treat her as an object to see if you take it. This is called a “shit test,” and lots of women do it. It’s smart strategy.
These are the conditions that a majority of women are forced to live in through no fault of anybody’s. That’s just the way it is.
If you are a man worthy of the name, you act accordingly. In this regard you have it much easier than they do.
Yes. If you are a woman, every strange man that you meet is a potential rapist. To be wise, she will need to make a good judgement before she allows him in a position where there could be an awkward moment or that could be put to the test.
I didn’t make it that way. I don’t like it that way. That’s just the way it is.
My daughter doesn’t know that yet. She’s not equipped to handle that. She is not capable of judging whether a man who is being nice to her has ulterior motives. Until the time when she is ready to handle that on her own, it is my job as a parent to protect her from such.
That is the job of every parent.
If you don’t get that, I don’t think you’re much of a man.
That’s fair. I don’t think you are much of a parent.
If I gave a shit what you thought, I’d pit you right now. But I’m tired and your posts in this thread are all the proof anybody needs to see that your arguments are fucking looney.
I don’t really care what it sounds like, or what you think about it. As I said before: As far as my daughter’s safety is concerned, I am the right hand of God. There is no arguing, or appeal or escape from my judgement in this matter.
My children are too young to protect themselves in this fashion. Until they are ready, this is the way it is.
Preach it, Brother. My hands were trembling. :eek: But I am also non-violent. 
But Scylla, not every woman IS raped. Not every man IS a potential rapist (except in the most theoretical sense by which we’re ALL potentially capable of evil).
Our job is twofold - to keep them safe until we turn them loose, yes; but also, to let them develop the skills that will keep them safe later.
You’re building a house of cards with your 100% guilty pose. It’s like every other type of fundamentalism, and once she encounters a good man, she may decide that all of your warnings were equally false.
Read The Gift of Fear, teach her to be sensible and follow her instincts; don’t demonize all men. What does that make you?
If I’m a dad with an attractive young female daughter I would be watchful and wary about strangers. If I don’t know you reasonably well your good intentions are (quite frankly) irrelevant to me as a father, weighed against my concern for her safety. People who will not approach children carefully in social settings, and insist on seeking out and engaging children without being given some tacit permission to do so by the on site parents or guardians of the child, are not obeying modern rules of conduct, and are thus (to me) highly suspicious at the worst and annoying at best. Obviously this (at least for me) does not include people the child runs to or into, or otherwise approaches themselves.
Your not paying attention. I didn’t say my daughter was “hot.” I said she was beautiful. There’s a difference. People that confuse the two, as you have done, are what concern me.
I suspect that there is only a very very small minority of men or boys who represent this kind of danger to my daughter. But there are a lot of people in this world and it is statiscally a virtual certainty that she will at some point encounter the attentions of some of these.
I guard against them. I deter them. It’s prudent.
I’m kind of suspicious of the motives of people that have an issue with this.
I get the impression that, deep down, you are suspicious of everyone.
Agreed. And if Scylla can’t tell that I’m being sarcastic with all the “hot daughter” cracks, how can he possibly tell the intentions of a “dangerous” male?
Don’t be coy – what is it that you suspect them of?
I disagree. But that is a matter of opinion, and definition of “rape”. If you define “rape” as “taking advantage of a drunk woman who paws him and says fuck me! even though she is not really giving informed consent” then yes,most men are capable of that. But not all- I have turned down two such women, and I think a good number of Members here would too. But I suppose if I give you “most” as “all” for hyperbole and “taking advantage of a drunk woman who paws him and says fuck me! even though she is not really giving informed consent” as rape, you are not terribly far off.
What isn’t a matter of opinion is that every man is not a potential pedophile. Very very few men are wired that way, a normal man simply finds nothing sexually exciting about a girl that young, no matter how beautiful. There just simply is no sexual reaction at all, except of fear and revulsion if he was exposed to it. A normal man would get angry or sick if forced into it, and he simply couldn’t get an erection.
Oh, come on, you’re just saying that! That’s what any XY person would do–you’re lulling us XX’s into a false sense of security and then you’ll POUNCE!
(humor, folks, humor! Please don’t kill me…) 
Yes, I know, but seriously, getting drunk with a bunch of men and no one to keep an eye on you is not a good idea. Even if the guy has the best intentions in the world, if he’s half-drunk also, remeber his judgement is also impaired.
No. But lots of women get raped by people they thought they could trust. There’s a two-edged sword here.
Yes. I agree and I said as much earlier. She needs to acquire the skills of good judgement in this.
I sincerely doubt my daughter is very much aware of the the social dynamic that goes on around her at this level between myself and those that approach her. I’m not sure what you are envisioning me doing, but it’s a pretty subtle give and take in most cases.
Example:
My daughter has young Billy’s toy that she found in the sandbox and is playing with it. Billy goes to retrieve his toy and my daughter fails to surrender it. Billy goes crying to his Dad. Dad brings Billy towards my daughter. His eyes send mine a message. This message says
“Our two children are engaged in a mild childish conflict that while annoying requires adult intervention. I am approaching your daughter with my child to handle this in an appropriate fashion. I seek your tacit permission to do so.”
My eyes respond with this message:
“Permission granted. I apologize for the brattiness of my offspring, and appreciate your forbearance. I will continue to monitor the interraction in case things escalate and you require further permissions or an intervention with my child.”
Now that seems like a pretty long conversation to have with a single glance or two, but that’s how it translates.
If the situation were reversed, I would not approach another’s child without this permission. If the permission is not sought from me than I am not a happy parent, and am likely to intervene.
Here’s why:
With the permission Billy’s father is going to say something like “Billy, do you want to say something to Scylla’s daughter?”
Billy will say: “Scylla’s daughter, may I please have the toy back?”
My daughter will look at me. This look will say “Father, though this toy is not mine, it has grown near and dear to my heart. There are rules and precedents known to children and under those rules I am now entitled to hold onto this toy.”
My return glance to her will say: “That may be so. But this matter has passed beyond the jurisdiction of the the Children’s Code, and is now subject to adult jurisdiction. Surrender the toy to Billy, and apologize for having taken it.”
Billy will accept the toy and they will leave. As they leave Billy’s father will send me a glance that says “Thank you for your assistance and permissions. That was a satisfactory transaction on my part. Are you in agreement?”
This is the way it works.
Almost everybody unknown to me seeks the Permission Glance before approaching my daughter. I always seek it before approaching somebody else’s kids.
If a kid approaches me I seek out the permission glance of the parent. That parent is usually looking at me and easy to find. If I cannot find it, I am alarmed.
This is the way it works. If you follow this, nothing really noticeable to the children or an outside observer is really occuring. If you break the rules, that’s when suspicions rise and things get noticeable and more overt signals get sent.
Those signals get sent to two groups. Those who are oblivious, and those who are acting innapropriately.
I’ve read it. I love it. I am teaching her this. I am also being sensible and following my instincts.
Duh!
Maybe their motives are that they’re really insulted that you think they’re rapists, and furthermore that if that upsets them that’s their problem?
Agreed. We are talking about a very small minority. The problem is that they don’t have “pedophile” or “molester” tattooed across their foreheads. They look and act just like you and me.
If you wish to molest a kid, you generally don’t advertise at a playground. You hide your intentions, and you seek legitimacy. You seek to appear normal and safe. You use camoflage.
So, I watch for signs in the breaking of the camoflage. Who is looking to long? Who seems to interested? Who seems furtive or nervous? Who is watching to see if I’m watching? Who just seems a little off.
On those occasions when I sense something, which is not often, I become more vigilant and look harder. Most of the time I am aware that I’m not going to be infallible and perfect and I seek to create a deterrent by showing obvious vigilance.
Other times, there are people that I don’t suspect of anything bad, but who I don’t interracting with my kids. For example, if Billy’s father in the previous example, seems irate or angry as he approaches my daughter he will not get the permission glance. If I do not like the way he is treating his child he will not get the permission glance. If he seeks to approach my daughter without it under these circumstances, I will go from subtle to overt and if he does not catch my signal I will intervene directly with him.