Albatross!!
Does it come in chocolate?
[dress up like a woman and screech]
Oh, intercourse the penguin!
[/dress up like a woman and screech]
It’s time now to play: FIND THE FISH!
Oh where can that fishy be?
A fish-fish-a-fish-fishy rrrrooooooo…
Most common question I ask: “What?”
Most common question I get: “Are you really hearing impaired?”
(shyly replying to this thread, she’s new here)
Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries
Of COURSE we’re French! Where do you think we got this outraaaaageous accent?
You say “cheesy” like that’s a BAD thing.
** CHOCOLATE? ** It’s a bloody seabird!
How do you know she’s a witch?
Ranger Jeff
*The Idol of American Youth *
She’s dressed like a witch!
Run away! Run away!
I almost soiled me armor…
LONESOME POLECAT
+++++++++++++
When the pin is pulled,
Mr. Grenade is no longer
our friend.
If we took the bones out it wouldn’t be crunchy, would it?
Mock Frog?!?!?! We use no artificial additives of any kind!
WARNING: I cannot be held responsible for the above as apparently my cat has learned to type.
Isn’t it awfully nice to have a penis?
Isn’t it frightfully good to have a dong?
It’s swell to have a stiffy,
It’s divine to own a dick.
Fron the tiniest little tadger,
To the World’s Biggest Prick!
So three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas,
Hurray for your one-eyed trouser snake!
Your piece of pork, your wife’s best friend,
Your percing or you cock.
You could wrap it up in ribbons,
You could slip it in your sock.
But don’t take it out in public,
or they will stick you in the dock,
and you won’t
come
back.
Oh, thank you very much.
SanibelMan
“A wise man will not leave the right to the mercy of chance, nor wish it to prevail through the power of the majority. There is but little virtue in the action of masses of men.”
– Henry David Thoreau
When I’m wearing the antlers, I am dictating.
I haven’t seen Holy Grail in a while, but wasn’t it “watery tart” instead of “strange women”, or is that a different line?
voltaire:
quote:
I keep a copy of []The Holy Grail around as a test. If they bring it back and say, “Well, that was weird!” they’re haters.
If they don’t bring it back but start saying stuff like “Strange wimmen lyin’ in ponds, distributin’ swords is no basis for a
system of government!” they’re lovers.*
I haven’t seen Holy Grail in a while, but wasn’t it “watery tart” instead of “strange women”, or is that a different line?
Dennis (Michael Palin) had three lines in a row like that:
Dennis: Listen, strange women lyin’ in ponds distributin’ swords is no basis for a system of government! Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony!
Dennis: Oh, but you can’t expect to wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you!
Dennis: Oh but if I went ‘round sayin’ I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they’d put me away!
Some things in life are bad, they can really make you mad.
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you’re chewing on life’s gristle,don’t grumble, give a whistle,
And this’ll help things turn out for the best;
And always look at the bright side of life.
Always look on the light side of life.
Ranger Jeff
*The Idol of American Youth *
Riders In The Sky
It’s only a model
We’re Knights of the Round Table.
We dance whene’er we’re able.
We do routines and chorus scenes
With footwork impeccable.
We dine well here in Camelot.
We eat ham and jam and spam a lot.
We’re Knights of the Round Table.
Our shows are formidable,
But many times we’re given rhymes
That are quite unsingable.
We’re opera mad in Camelot.
We sing from the diaphragm a lot.
In war we’re tough and able,
Quite indefatigable.
Between our quests we sequin vests and impersonate Clark Gable.
It’s a busy life in Camelot.
I have to push the pram a lot.
Well, I object to all this sex on the television! I mean, I keep falling off!