… last year, the Government spent less on the Ministry of Silly Walks than it did on National Defence!
You try any of that here young man, and we’ll slit your face!
Well, never mind. I’ll just take the Lord Lieutenant in Nylons, then, and these two copies of Piggie Parade. Thank you.
Listen…chaps…there’s still a chance. I’m…done for, I’ve…got a gamy leg and I’m going fast; I’ll never get through. But…some of you might. So…you’d better eat me.
No, no, I mustn’t. It makes me throw up… oh, I’m so bleeding happy.
I’d like to welcome the pommey bastard to God’s own Earth, and remind him that we don’t like stuck-up sticky-beaks here.
This man commands a cwack legion!
He wanks as high as any in Wome!
Now will you please tell me what in God’s name possessed you to paint this with three Christs in it?
Michelangelo: It works, mate!
Pope: Works?
Michelangelo: Yeah! It looks great! The fat one balances the two skinny ones.
I’m a qualified brain surgeon! I only do this job because I like being my own boss!
Look, we are not Tudor persons. We are the police.
Toledo Tit Parade?
Sure is. It’s real Hawaiian food served in an authentic medieval English dungeon atmosphere…
I know what literature is, you Dago dustbin.
As the horrendous Black Beast lunged forward, escape for Arthur and his knights seemed hopeless. When, suddenly, the animator suffered a fatal heart attack…
Reg: There is not one of us who would not gladly suffer death to rid this country of the Romans once and for all.
Dissenter:Uh, well, one.
Reg: Oh, yeah, yeah, there’s one. But otherwise, we’re solid.
It was a day like any other and Mr. and Mrs. Samuel Brainsample were a perfectly ordinary couple, leading perfectly ordinary lives–the sort of people to whom nothing extraordinary ever happened, and not the kind of people to be the centre of one of the most astounding incidents in the history of mankind … So let’s forget about them and follow instead the destiny of this man, Harold Potter, gardener, and tax official, first victim of Creatures from another Planet.
The one I was really after was Arthur Hotchkiss’s Devonshire Country Churches.
Good evening. It’s just after eight o’clock, and time for the penguin on top of your television to explode.
My Lord of Warwick! Raise high the drawbridge. Gloucester’s troops approach!