We’ve just been mentioned on telly!
Why is there a penguin on the telly?
Per’aps it’s from next door.
We must never forget that if there was not one thing that was not on top of another thing our society would be nothing more than a meaningless body of men that gather together for no good purpose.
If you complain nothing happens, you might as well not bother.
Well, there’s egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg, bacon and spam; egg, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, egg, spam, spam, bacon and spam; spam, spam, spam, egg and spam; spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam and spam; or Lobster thermidor aux crevettes with a mornay sauce garnished with truffle pâté, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam.
Sorry, loves, sorry, the show is too long this week and this scene’s been cut.
Who said that?
It must be a king.
Well, I didn’t vote for you.
I’m thirty seven - I’m not old!
Now, my good wife, whilst I rest, read to me awhile from Shakespeare’s Gay Boys in Bondage.
Is, ah, is your wife a sport, ay?
You are hereby charged that you did wilfully take part in a strange sketch, that is, a skit, spoof or humorous vignette of an unconventional nature with intent to cause grievous mental confusion to the Great British Public.
But it’s my only line!
Well, when is your next round?
I’ve got a triple fracture of the right leg, dislocated collar bone and multiple head injuries, so I do most of the heavy work, like helping the surgeon.
Are you rolling your own jelly babies in there?
That’s Mr. Jenkins - he’s another idiot. And so you see the idiot does provide a vital psycho-social service for this community. Oh, excuse me, a coach party has just arrived. I shall have to fall off the wall, I’m afraid.
I will not buy this tobacconist’s. It is scratched.