Monty Python`s LOTR

Dear Sir,

I wish to complain on the strongest possible terms about the song you have just posted about the Uruk-hai who wears women’s clothes.

Many of my best friends are Uruk-hai and only a few of them are transvestites.

Yours faithfully,
Brigadier Sir Charles Arthur Strong (Mrs).

And now…
the naughty bits of an orc

Someone should do the Cheese Shop sketch. I’m not talented enough.

Gondorian beaver cheese?

No, no - don’t tell me - I’m keen to guess.

Aw, the Gaffer’s eaten it!

Great job! What about the line…

Frodo: All right I’ll give it to you but first I must ask "How do you make an an Urk-hai cross? By stepping on his corn.

One Lembas waybread without so much rat in it later… <ding>

Frodo: Appalling!
Sam: Oh, you’re always complaining…

Fortunately for the fellowship, Balrogs do not so much fly as plummet.

Sam: Why are the Balrogs up in the tree?

Frodo: They thinks they’re birds? You see Harold? 'e’s the instigator of the group…

And what are the implications of Balrog aviation?

  • Half time score -
    Sauron: 2
    Fellowship: 0

It’s spelt “Frodo Baggins” but its pronounced “Throat-wobbler Mangrove.”

Faramir, apparently your Brother died.

How to protect yourself against an orc armed with fresh fruit.

What about pointed sticks?

where’d everyone go?

Gandalf (to Balrog) : Ok, you attack me.

Balrog attacks Gandalf.

Gandalf (to fellowship) : Now, I pull this lever…and a 16-ton weight falls on him.

Frodo: What if you don’t have a 16-ton weight?