More of God's Greatest Mistakes

Can God make a stone so heavy that he cannot lift it?

Been there, done that.

Wow. I had never considered such a question before? Is it possible? Is it paradox? Does it imply a limit to omnipotence or an omnipotence that transcends logic? Think of the ramifications?

If God could do that, could he make himself forget that he had done it?
If the rock was too heavy for Him, could God create another being strong enough to lift it?
If the other being did lift it, could God make the rock heavier and squash him?
If God did that, which would be kind of mean, really, would he feel guilty?
If He did feel guilty, could he change the way he truly felt?
If He could change the way He truly felt, could he just give himself eternal psychic orgasms?
If God could give himself eternal psychic orgasms, would each one be as good as th efirst or would they get old after a while?
If eternal psychic orgasms get old after a while, could God just vibrate the Universe, you know, just until the right deity came along?

Damn – I think that would make me motion sick.

I hope He can’t make the rock.

Preach it, brother Spiritus.

Can He make a tomato too big for Him to eat? OK, well, then why’s He gotta eat, anyway?

Well, ya gotta love it. It’s like a Bible Thumper posting Pascal’s Wager.

Yes he can. And no he can’t.

And that’s the Gods’ honest truth.

Can Cisco make a post so ridiculous that everybody on the Board turns against him?


It’s okay, Cisco. We love ya, man. :wink:

Okay, how 'bout this. God makes the rock, and then moves everything else in the universe down, thus lifting the unliftable rock. (If the rock was on a table before, and He moved the universe down, oh, say, three feet, the rock is now three feet above the table.)

Somehow, I doubt that God is overly concerned with our inability to comprehend His omnipotence.

Does He have to physically lift it?

He could just vaporize it and the rock would go up without the need to apply a muscular force and sweat on His clothes. Does it rain when he sweats?

By the way, how much does God bench press? What gym does He go to?

I always thought of this question as just our inability to comprehend omnipotence, of course i didnt make it up, but it is fun asking the question to people who have never heard it before. It’s usually something like:
“Of course he can! he can do anything!”
“wait a second, if he makes a rock so big he cant lift it then he couldnt do anything! ARRRRRRRGGGGGGG!!!”
Another way to look at it is instead of him making the rock so BIG he could make the rock stay the same size and just continually make it more dense. I suppose the rock would just keep getting heavier and heavier at some mind-numbing rate with the prospect that he might not be able to lift it one day, but surely whoever asked the question would be dead long before this happened and it wouldnt matter.
Its pretty funny. One devout Christian almost punched me when I asked him this one time though so be careful who you ask.

Blatant piece of quasi-witnessing, but it was witty, and poignant, enough that I think it’ll be acceptable:

A quick-witted Christian once, asked that, said, “Well, not really.” Surprised by this peculiar answer, the questioner asked for an explanation. The response: “One rock he created took him three days to move – the one at the door of his tomb.”

:smiley: :smiley: :smiley:

I disagree.

My, what a pithy attitude! :smiley:

Lets throw to the mix yet another hypothesis, just to keep this fine thread going.

Suppose that God clones Himself. As everybody knows, two Gods are better than one.

Might the two deities, working in unison, manage to lift the mighty massive rock?

You betcha.

Another important matter to consider: would Christianity become a polytheistic religion?

So it goes something like this:

God makes the rock so heavy he cant lift it, proceeds to clone a buddy for himself and together, they heave the unheavable, thus he made the rock, and with the help of his cohort (fundamentally part of himself) he lifts it, solving the age old riddle!! Good one quasar!! :D:D:D

Or, perhaps every time He feels like making “a rock so large He cannot lift it” a stellar mass somewhere in the universe contracts within it’s own Schwartzchild radius, and collapses.

It could happen.


quasar said:

Rhetorical question–how many Fathers, Sons, and Holy Spirits are required before a religion is considered polytheistic?

There is an actual answer to the OP, though it requires one to buy into the underlying belief in an omnipotent deity. The answer is yes, God can create a stone so heavy that He can’t lift it…but as soon as He decides that He canlift it, it is no longer too heavy.

(Don’t complain to me–it isn’t my fault.)