Or a phone booth. 
“Uh oh fart. Uh oh fart.”
“Did you fart, Ray? Did you fucking fart?”
“Fart.”
“How can you stand that?”
“I don’t mind it.”
“How can you stand it?”
“Ten minutes to Wapner. We’re definitely locked in this box with no TV.”
Eine kleine furzmusik?
I’m sure if L. Tom Hubbard reviews the scene he can determine who the culprit is by examining everyone closely… Here you can see Bill’s (extra #6), head, go back and to the left. Back and to the left. Back and to the left.
Pffffffffft!
What’s scary is that he may actually believe that. And he may have convinced himself that he never has gas, the same way he’s convinced himself that he’s no longer dyslexic, because Xenu took care of both those things.
Not the worst time for a fart by any means.
Unless the culprit squints and hikes up one leg, I don’t see Grissom and the CSI Fart Squad nailing down the perp with the film footage.
“Wait…there! Enhance it! Enhance it!”
pounds floor with fists
Stop! gasp Stop! My sides hurt! I’m going to piss myself! Stop!
holds sides and laughs helplessly
If any of the crew members are $cienos, they’ll be forced to undergo an auditing session, and no way is someone going to get out of that without confessing that they were the one who farted. Let’s hope the farter wasn’t a lowly $cieno who tried but couldn’t hold it in.
I hate the idea of this movie anyway. Cruise isn’t doing it because he admires the characters (unless it’s for Slithy Tove’s reasons), but because he wants to do an end run around the German government and win the hearts and minds of the German people, because Germany has long had $cientology’s number on being a creepy brainwashing cult.
This could help explain why he was so virulently anti-smoking, particularly in his Fuhrerbunker; once enough methane builds up, lighting up could spark a disaster.
Not really, though, as the Mythbusters team proved.
I’ll buy that. But if he wanted to make a movie about heroic anti-Hitler Germans, why didn’t he make a movie about the White Rose, with Katie as Sophie Scholl, instead of about a bunch of self-serving junkers? Great story, wouldn’t be a dry eye in the house. Oh, but Tom’s too old to play any of the male leads, and he couldn’t wear a snazzy uniform.
I’d say Cruise was embarrassing his religion, but I don’t that that’s possible. So let him be a Scentologist if he wants too.
I thought the Mythbusters only proved that the fart gas would never build up to the levels where it would smother you…I don’t believe they considered what a lit cigarette might add to the equation.
Adam did show that you can light farts on fire, but it had to be edited out of the American version. You can see it on YouTube.
Kenny proved that in “South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut”. 
Ah, lieu, you’ve done it again. 
Brilliance, I say! Pure brilliance!! I say we should give you a minute of silence to honor your gracious self. (Please pass the beans).
Shouldn’t Tom Cruise have himself fired? I mean, after all, what is a fart but the noxious emissions of an asshole? As I see it, he’s one of the worst offenders around.
My Katie does not pass gas, not even in her currently brainwashed state.
I love the self importance of this comment (bolding mine):
M-kay… Stauffenberg and his co-conspirators were indeed non-Nazis, but until 1944 they’d fully participated in the Nazi takeover of France and the battles that killed many Allied troops and locals in North Africa and Italy. Like General Armin von Roon in Herman Wouk’s Winds of War and War & Remembrance it’s interesting to note that they became Hitler haters about the time Hitler started losing the war and enacted the plot to kill him only post D-Day when it would have been very advantageous in negotiating a favorable peace with the Allies. (At the time of the July plot, the Allies had not yet liberated Paris or crossed into Germany, but it was pretty evident to the non deluded that they would be doing both soon, BUT at the same time Germany was still a strong enough fortress that, especially with Hitler gone, the Allies would probably have given them generous terms for surrender.)
Long way of saying, just because he tried to kill Hitler doesn’t mean he was a saint or even anti-evil. He was a Machiavellian opportunist who could have blown Hitler to kingdom come if he’d been willing to die with him, but instead wanted to be Cromwell to the Nazi’s Cavaliers.
In addition to which, Hitler’s flatulence was a matter of record (stress, vegetarian diet, ulcers, etc- bad combo). Had it been DeNiro he’d have appreciated the authenticity the fart brought to the set of a movie about Hitler’s court. (The scene of Hitler’s barge hovering over the pit where they threw the conspirators and Stauffenberg’s gold bikini clad last minute desperate attempt to strangle Hitler with the chain that connected him to Hitler’s throne is said to be reenacted with incredible realism, incidentally.)
Never mind.
“OK… now zoom in on that guy’s ass… Hey! Get that smirk off your face! The only reason I’ve been doing this for the past five hours is to see who cut the cheese!!”
lieu reminds me of why I keep subscribing to the Dope- where else do you get intelligent fart puns about 20th century history?
Plus the Dope’s a great substitute for sex- lots of willing asses and it goes down several times per day.
As for who’s playing Hitler, I think it’s a computer animated dachshund now that original choice Don Knotts is dead and Danny Devito couldn’t commit due to dietary reasons.