So my boyfriend and I watched “The Matrix” alst night. Absolutely amazing effects, but dear Lord–the dialogue, Keanu, the hilarious poses he strikes in battle…we were laughing out loud at several scenes that weren’t intentionally funny. About halfway through, I said, “Oh, man, this movie HAS to be on Mystery Science Theater 3000!” Bri and I were stopping and rewinding some of the more hysterical scenes to do some of our own banter–frick, it was funny. This movie MUST appear on the show! And if MS3K has gone off the air, it needs to come out of retirement for this movie!
Not to mention The Phantom Menace. Man, that thing was painful (if however neat looking).
What are your nominations?
(And BTW, what licensing/copyright/blah blahg blah laws would need to be bent to get a movie on that show, anyway? Why nothing from the last 5 years?)
The remade version of “The Haunting.” The wife and I actually started doing the MST3K schtick near the end, and it worked to a T. We had each other in stitches.
“We are here for this – to make mistakes and to correct ourselves, to withstand the blows and to hand them out.” Primo Levi
Nah, I’ve always thought The Godfather lent itself more to a Rocky Horror Picture Show style audience participation thing. I could dig up my chalk stripe suit and body armor and bring my props: piano wire, revolver with no serial number and tape on the butt, fish wrapped in newspaper, oranges.
Deep Blue Sea, oh and definitely the remake of The Haunting! Saw those both the same weekend. I actually kinda liked The Haunting, but Deep Blue Sea is now my permanent vote for worst movie ever. It will take some work to top that puppy.
Rather, I was in the position of a spore which, having finally accepted its destiny as a fungus, still wonders if it might produce penicillin.
–Ayi Kwei Armah
Thank God I didn’t shell out the dough to watch this debacle in the theater. About ten of us were sitting around just ripping the film apart in MST3K style when it came on video.
It’s like the director/writer couldn’t decide if they wanted an ALIEN theme or a campy theme or a early twenty-something I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER CAST theme. Instead, it just sucked.
Whichever that one is where Johnny Depp’s daughter gets kidnapped by people who want him to kill someone (the mayor?). Yes, I know I can look it up on IMDB, but is that movie really worth the effort?
I don’t know if any of you caught this. Two of the last three seasons that MST3K was in production, they would do a special in which they would show trailers of that years releases and have their way with them. Tom Servo would act as host (in a tux, no less) and other characters would come on to join him and Crow.
While they’re releasing video tapes of MST3K episodes, I’d like to see them toss in these two specials as well.
enemy of the state
That would be really funny.
My brother and I do this sort of thing all the time, turn the volume down on some flic and talk for them. We usually end up laughing ourselves hoarse.
I’m gonna miss that chump when I move away…
Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.
Meet Joe Black is full of pregnant pauses that would make it easy to fit in comments. And imagine what Claire Forlani has to say to the other people at the birthday party as she and Brad Pitt walk back to it at the end.
“Hi, I have two pieces of news. First, the guest of honor is dead. Second, I’d like you to meet my new boyfriend. He was killed in a horrible traffic accident a couple of days ago, but it’s all right because he’s all better now.”
The Thin Red Line. “And so now we know the truth. Hiroshima happened because the narrator would not shut his friggin’ hole!”
Universal Soldier 2: The Return.
The Ninth Gate. I was making fun of it as I watched it. MAN, that movie sucked!
Eye Of The Beholder. “Filmed in Confuso-vision!”
Body Shots.
Romeo must die. A fun, cheesy movie that would be so easy to make fun of. “Ya know, China really should have gotten a budget before remaking the Matrix.”
Congo. Terrible movie based on an equally terrible Michael Crichton novel. Fake styrofoam and fiberglass scenery, and ape costumes so bad you could practically see the zippers. Not to mention horrible acting.
Dad and I were considering going to see Mission to Mars the other day, so he went on the net to look up some reviews after I said I’d heard it wasn’t that good. He mentioned that one of the reviews he’d read said it’d make a perfect MST3K movie.
Easy. Redneck Zombies. made in MD/DE for about 39.95. Actually worth watching. These rednecks get into military toxic waste. Actually very gory and very funny. Filmed with a regular video camera.
Sex is like bridge: If you don’t have a good partner, you better have a good hand.
– Charles Pierce
