Congrats, Hokienautic, if you’re still reading our Boards… and, by the way, this is clear evidence that, although Cecil doesn’t post much, he does read the SDMB from time to time.
That’s cool that Unca Cec’ still pulls a question off the boards now and again. But a little more background is in order. The board thread is from February of 2004, so I am wondering what prompted The Master to hop in the Wayback machine and pick that particular thread? Or has he been pecking it out on the Underwood for two years?
I’ve been sorting the mail for Cecil for several years, and I still have no clue what he’s going to jump on, or when, or why. Sometimes he goes on a kick of responding to the most recent emails; sometimes, he goes looking through the backlog. He’s an eccentric genius, he gets his moods, what can I say?
In a Frying Pan we fry, we use oil, and fat i.e.: cholesterol.
We are killing ourselves with our food more than we are killing each other with guns.
Murder Rate has got to be lower than death from Heart attacks. That does not even bring in the deaths from diabetes and other complications brought on by being over weight .
I used to live in Trinidad and Tobago, where the two main ethnic groups are Indian and African. After repeatedly seeing articles in the paper about men beating women to death with a “bilna,” I asked one of my (African) co-workers what this was. He told me it was the Trini-Indian word for a rolling pin. He said, “Is Indian men does beat they wives with a bilna.” So of course I asked him, “What do African men use to beat their wives with?” He thought for a minute and said, “A rolling pin.”
All of this has reminded me of a country song I heard back in the seventies, with the following refrain:
“With my big iron skillet in my hand,
Gonna show you how a little woman can whip a great big man.
If you live through the fight we’re gonna have when you get home,
You’ll wake up and find yourself alone.”
I don’t think that anyone looking for a suitable object to throw at somebody in a fit of temper is going to spend much time evaluating its aerodynamic properties. They are far more likely to grab a projectile that is close at hand. If the thrower is in the kitchen, he or she is hardly going to take a trip to the study where the African spears are kept in a glass cabinet then come back and throw one of them at the spouse.
Furthermore, aerodynamic considerations become less relevant the closer the weapon is to its target. The Guevara frying pan is fully effective over a distance of 12’ and I’m sure I could hit a stationary spouse with it over this distance.
Unfortunately I don’t have a cite for this assertion. However, purely in the interests of fighting ignorance, I intend to buy a dozen blow-up dolls from the local pornographer and hang them from the washing line in my back garden. I plan also to purchase several frying pans of varying size and weight.
Then, one afternoon when nobody is around, I intend to have a lot of fun with these dolls. I will report on my experiences at a later date. If I fail to do so it may be safely assumed that I have been detained by the police, and that I am being interviewed by them yet again regarding my current obsession with bizarre sexual practices.
hey, boys and girls, are we talking about teflon frying pans, or iron skillets?
‘Cause nowadays, most fryin’ pans are lightweight aluminum-and-teflon jobs. Not like back in the good ol’ days, when real men smoked Marleboro around the campfire, and they used a real, old-fashioned, black cast iron skillet.
Now, if you knock somebody upside the head with a skillet, you’re gonna hit him hard, and maybe kill him.The sheriff 'll send out a posse of cowboys to chase you and hang you from a tree.
But if you hit somebody with an aluminum/teflon jobie bought at Bed Bath and Beyond, then you’re not gonna kill him. Maybe a bump on the head, but not a murder. So you won’t be included in the murder statistics. You’re more likely to get sent for counselling in anger management.
(disclaimer: I’m not denying the seriousness of domestic abuse. I just don’t think that a frying pan is likely to be the weapon of choice in the murder statistics.)
Couldn’t agree more. In all the domestic violence murders I have seen over the years, a frying pan has figured in exactly none. Most of them involve guns. Many of them involve stabbings (usually kitchen knives, but at least one with the stem of a smashed-off wineglass). One was from a box of tiles which somehow fell on his wife’s head - repeatedly - he tried to pass it off as accident - we were wondering if the box was springloaded and kept jumping back on the shelf and falling on her head again, or if somehow the safety was off - sorry, morgue humor. Same disclaimer as chappachula above.
Probably the most horrendous DV murder I have seen was many years ago in Memphis. Wife versus husband after long history of husband beating on wife in episode after episode of domestic violence. He’s alcoholic, too, and in his fifties, and she’s in her twenties. No idea why they married…
Anyhow, he comes home drunk and beats her and then passes out in a drunken snooze in bed, and she sits there nursing her injuries and thinking: That was the last time. And she gets a big cooking pot (no frying pan) and a five pound sack of sugar, and she puts the pot on the stove and heats it up real good, and she pours in the sugar and stirs it with a wooden spoon until it all melts and you’re starting to try to figure out if it’s in the “soft ball stage” or “hard ball stage” depending on whether you’re making fudge or hard candy. And she picks up that pot with potholders on the handles, walks into the bedroom, and dumps it all over him.
He lasted two months in the burn ICU before succumbing. He said while he was still conscious that he didn’t want to press charges. But the police pressed them after he died of the burns, because it was homicide.
