When I was a young whipper snapper, knee high to a grasshopper, my old ma told me that if I was really good, I might grow up to post on the Straight Dope. And here I am, decades later, in the ‘4 digits club’.
But the rich smorgasbord of my life hasn’t been completely dedicated to the Dope. Between dropping my pearls of wisdom in to your waiting laps, I’ve done my bit to enrich the world.
On the plus side, I’d say that my giving young Pablo his paint-by-numbers kit must be judged a success. My, you ought to have seen his eyes light up when he saw it. I’m also proud of the tank driving lessons I gave the Chinese army. You probably have seen the fancy braking manouveures they used in Tiananmen Square. Yup, I taught them that.
I’m not so happy with the results when I told Adolph to get out a bit and visit some other countries. Still, I think the jury’s still out on that one. One that I will put my hand up to was suggesting that the Texas School Book Depository would make an ideal place to have a rifle target shooting range. How was I know to know that some fool would practice on a moving target out of the window?
Ah well.
But no party’s complete without a joke. Bob Monkhouse, a popular but uniquely awful British comedian said: “They laughed when I said I was going to be a comedian. They’re not laughing now.”
The drinks are on the table, and the party hats are over there. Enjoy yourselves!
I didn’t know so either Nine, and I’ve been here for a longer time than you, It’s a stupid ruling that just serves to squash the party atmosphere of the SDMB. Why don’t you just get a kitten or something, and then the thread will be allowed to continue forever…
Just post a pic of the old girl, and you’ll be right!
And if she’s really old and has incontinence problems like old pussies do, you’re onto a real winner in the thread stakes** Nine**! Dopers love that stuff.
